I am an Alcoholic

[ghengis]

Today I have finally admitted to myself that I am an Alcoholic.

I don't have booze first thing in the morning or (usually) during the day but I drink to excess in the evening and wake up in the morning determined not to drink that evening. Only I always do and now it's making me and DH miserable.

I could really do with some support and advice from any recovering alcoholics. Help.

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Pinetree and Ghengis ... just wanted to say how brilliant it is that you are posting ....
I am pregnant at the moment so am off booze but before I got pregnant I couldn't get through an evening without a glass or two ... It creeps up on you doesn't it? In the old days it was drinking at weekends only and then slowly but surely you find you are doing it every night.
I have a very close friend who went to AA 14 years ago. She has not had a drink in that time and she is convinced that AA saved her life. I think that you are both being so strong to admit this ..... keep posting and listening to C18's Dh who is being brilliant by offering that support ...
Thinking of you all ... xxx
PS ... Pinetree ... I am in NZ too, where are you? Are you a kiwi or an immigrant (like me!) ????

Well, I got through last night but it was so much harder. I feel cr*p this morning (itchy eyes, skin looks terrible, feeling nauseous) and my period has just started - thank you God!

I am terrified that I will fall off the wagon but by thinking 'in the now' I am coping. I am desperately focusing on C18's DH's comment about "keep it simple, nice and easy" and "welcome back to life".

Would AA help? I could go this evening but I am a bit embarrassed!

ghengis - go to AA. You won't know whether it will help you or not unless you go, and if it does help you, then how fantastic would that be?

There is no need to be embarrassed, it is an incredibly strong and positive step, and on a practical point - it is anonymous!

I think you are great.

Well done Ghengis, you're doing brilliantly. Pinetree how are you?

I know how you feel, my dh and I nearly always a bottle of wine between us in the evening and it's difficult to give it up. We are trying to have 2 or 3 nights off a week but it is so hard. And it's sometimes a struggle not to open that second bottle.

I admire you for what you are doing.

ps if you are finding C18's DH's comments so helpful and supportive, and he is basically giving you the AA's messages, then surely it is worth going to AA and listening to how it works, and getting similar support, directly? just a thought...

My S-i-l is an alcoholic (has not had a drink for about 5 years now) and she tried AA. She said that they seemed to be suggesting that you substitute god for alcohol and as she is in no way religious she didn't go again.

It may be that different groups operate in different ways so don't take my/her word for it.

In honour of Ghenghis and Pinetree - I didn't have a drink last night either!
My DP and I share a bottle a night, every night and now we've got to the stage where 1 bottle isn't enought and the 2nd one gets opened. So thinking about this thread I decided not to drink anything other than sparkling Elderflower water and very nice it was too!

Well done again girls. Hope tonight goes well. Like I said before take it slow, take each day as it comes, think about tomorrow, tomorrow. Just an hour at a time. Ghengis - Feeling shit is is part of the toxins coming out of your body. You may well get headaches too but it's all worth it. It's all the sh1t coming out, that's where it's supposed to be going - out of you and away.

look forward to hearing more from you.
lots of love to all people not having a drink tonight.

Well done Genghis (and Pinetree) and all the others who are thinking more about their drinking habits due to this thread - it's got to be a good thing. Out of interest, have you all drunk more since your DDs and DSs have arrived? It's definitely the case with me and DH - the stress of being parents eh!

Well done you two - when it gets hard just think about the positive effects it will have on not only your health but also the atmosphere of your home and how having you back will feel to your children (I mean you back by you without booze).

I lived with my grandad when I was young and he was an alcoholic and I still flinch when I smell the awful acidy smell that drunk people give off - not saying this to make you depressed but just want you to understand how far reaching the effects are.

You are both doing so well and as with all things like this the old adage things will get worse before they get better probably applies but things will get better and hopefully very soon.

All my love and best wishes.

ghengis - Why not got to the AA meeting if you have the opportunity. If there's a chance it will help you through tonight then go for it.

I've heard about the religious angle to AA (as mentioned by SamboM) one of my Aunt's was put of AA for this reason. However, you need to make your own judgement on this so why not go and see what's what.

Good Luck.

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Well done Ghengis - and as so many have said, don't be embarrassed. If you go to AA everyone will be in the same boat. If you go and don't find it helpful you have lost nothing.

It may take up to 10 days to detox but don't despair - after it is over you will feel so great! You will have clear sparkling eyes and good skin, and you will be full of energy. It will be so worth it. Lots of love.

AA only requires that a person make the decision to believe that there is a higher power outside themselves that can suspend their compulsion for drinking. That "higher power" need not be God; it can be the 12-Step Process itself, it can be the support offered by the meetings you attend, it can be the collective consciousness of the AA groups around the world. It can be a fuzzy green stuffed frog that lives on your child's bed; whatever. It can simply be the belief that there are bigger forces in the world than you. Second step is mostly about having faith that if you're willing, the desire to drink can be lifted. Step 3 is about being willing...

There are an AWFUL LOT of resolute atheists in 12-step programmes around the world.

Okay, I'm going to go. I arranged for my DH to be home in time to allow me to go and he was gobsmacked when I told him why. He asked if things were really that bad (!) and, having thought hard about it I know that they are. AA might not be appropriate for me but I won't know til I go. So I'm going!

Good for you Ghengis, I really hope it works for you.

Thanks SamboM. I'm terrified!

You will probably find that it is full of lovely warm people like yourself - they won't be monsters you know and you have admitted it to far more people on mumsnet than you will at your AA meeting.

The best of luck. xxx

(Will be thinking of you whilst also thinking of Jemma and Bunny!!)

Brilliant, well done Ghengis. I hope it goes really well. I'll be thinking of you...

Blimey - go girl! Well done Ghengis - that's amazing. Suck it and see aye, and lets us know how you get on. You're doing so brilliantly, I think I speak for all posters on this thread when I say we're really proud of you.

Let us know how it goes, Ghengis.

Good Luck! Surely everyone is embarrassed 1st time. If it wasn't really hard to go there and say it, then it wouldn't be so effective, I guess (you know, like you know you really meant it when you find it hard to say I love you for the first time).

Agree, Twinnies.

Good luck Ghengis!

Pinetree, how're you doing?

Oh well done Ghengis and I hope it goes well tonight.