Class of '18 results day

[OhYouBadBadKitten]

[[https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/further_education/3313710-Class-of-18-nervously-waiting old thread]]

You know the drill though, that one needs to be used up first lowers glasses to give (behave Chocolate!)

Some of us already have btech results, some have unconditionals, but it's a nervous time for most. Lots of

mrslant imho it takes a while for the idea of supporting your child at uni to sink in, some people seem baffled by the parental contribution aspect and get irrationally angry/stressed by it. Perhaps he'll calm down, how mean of him though to put this stress on you. What does he think you can do to solve this except to declare father and son estranged? I know that even dh has felt quite cross with ds re: the money aspect of uni, it puts a strain on relationships if you think your child needs to work harder/grow up, but your ds is being very grownup, responsible AND works, so it is totally unreasonable of your ex..

If things seem wonky and there's no risk of dropping a grade I would definitely go for a re mark. Just so that there's no always wondering, it's something that can be put to bed. But it's up to them.

x post, MrSlant sorry I see he has agreed to pay a bit. But your ds won't forget this grudgingness, it will backfire on your ex.

MrSlant - i think my xh is planning something similar - just diverting his child maintenance from me to them. I shall be armed however with the data - how many weeks of the year are spent at university and how many at my home etc. Plus gthe fact that I buy most of their essentials.

No you were right first time nettles but I think he will now contribute a bit of the money he was 'saving' to DS1. It's no wonder I feel strung out when no one else has done any thinking about uni for my lovely boy. We'll manage somehow because we always do and looking at Student Room on the internet all the expenditure seems to be about 'pre-drinking' before you go to a club and that's not an issue. Paying for a new kayak on the other hand...

My ExH pays DS1 £300/term and that's it. More than I expected but less than I'd hoped. He will be paying nothing to DS2 who will be staying at home (with me) for his course. DS2 gets around £6000 which is the maximum maintenance loan for living at home so will be sharing that with me to provide his board and clothes. Plenty left over for 'pocket money.' I had so much grief on another thread for 'taking his maintenance' when I should be 'supporting him out of my earnings.' He'll actually have more disposable income than me and will be getting a bargain compared to DS1's rent etc. I will be losing child benefit, child tax credit and maintenance so belts will be tightened.

ExH has also got a bargain because they'd both have had the minimum loan had we still been together. And DS3 to go, just starting sixth form.

Boule he was just thinking about diverting all the money to him not DS but I think I've shamed him into being a slightly more caring father. I buy everything for my boys, I swear if he knew how much it cost to have three insanely sporty children ( goggles/trunks, trainers, studs, astro boots, spikes, rugby kit, club subs etc) he'd combust! Worth it though to have children who love to be outdoors and exercising. Dear goodness the amount they eat as well. Pfft, I'm happy to take the hit.

[googles kayak prices]

well, that is all very interesting.
I see you can actually build your own canoe from a kit!!!!

Oh jeeze Ellen 'taking his maintenance' I am with you completely, I'll be hundreds of pounds down and still trying to support him when he goes away. I do my best but it's not easy, thank goodness we have supportive threads here. As 'resident parent' I've had a lot of help that I'm grateful for but when you see how little support they get from the non resident it's unsurprising that we need it. Ex-h has given me the absolute minimum required and then lived his life not having to worry every month. Happy that it means DS will get a grant from the government but sad that it means I can't help him very much myself.

In my experience, going to uni and having your own money to budget with will make you realise if your nonresident parent is a stingy bastard who you're better off without . Uni teaches you an awful lot of self respect. You learn to value the people who are genuinely always there and always care, whether it's about your bad essay mark or your burnt shepherds pie, over the Disney dad's or the financial contributors who can't be bothered to pay real attention to your life.

Yes, he's a dick, MrSlant but we get by and I'm happier without him.

The DSs are still desperate for his attention and approval, unfortunately but that's how it goes. Unconditional love from me so they take it for granted but not so secure with his love so they try too hard. Frustrating but that's life.

I wish my boys were outdoorsy. They could be vampires they're so unfamiliar with daylight!

Dc got a lower economics grade (c not A/b) then expected and apparently it has dented his confidence as he wasn’t aware he had done badly. The marks aren’t even near boundary so it s not worth getting them re-marked. aQA charge around £40 per paper. Apparently you can get a clerical re-mark where they check every thing has been added correctly, no missing papers etc, so we are considering that.

Apparently other boards it’s cheaper now.

We did get a couple of his GCSEs re-marked and his maths went up a grade (and then we got the money back).

2 of DS results lower than expected, based on mocks/practise papers/questions and how he felt exam gone. In both cases, he thought he'd done well enough for B, expected grade was C and he got D. Very shocked and disappointed. However, he was still accepted on his course and so he's decided not to worry about it. (For what he's doing A levels definitely won't matter post degree).

average graduate salaries

Thought it was an interesting read.

I keep trying to catch up with the thread but never actually managing to post!
Raspberry I'm so glad your DD got a place sorted.
Lonicera we will miss you! Keep popping in to keep us updated on your DD's adventures!
Everyone - phew! We made it!
The last 2 days have felt like a whirlwind of celebrations, family, friends (and kittens! )

We seem to have either been out or had a houseful permanently since Thursday morning!

I hope all the dc (and parents!) have enjoyed the celebrations and also managed to get some rest. ( 2 undisturbed nights sleeps for me! )

I'm so proud of all our wonderful dc - and excited for the next chapter!

DS was out from lunchtime on results day until late last night. The bottle of champagne I'd been saving may have been drunk in his absence

I had a whole lovely nights sleep. It was wonderful! Weird, weird dreams though! All the stress has fallen off dd and she's been looking at the societies she's going to join. Some of them are hilarious, but perfect for her.

I slept really well until I suddenly woke up thinking it was a mistake and they just pressed the wrong button and DS isn't in after all, I don't make life easy on myself .

Do all unis do a 'welcome pack'. He's not had anything through other than emails yet and I'm desperate to get planning with him and also budget for all the kayaks books and boots and compasses he'll need.

Flatmouse I think the A levels have been harder this time. In ds1's case I was really expecting poor results, so perhaps that has disorted my opinion of his actual results which are at best mediocre (But We ARE VERY PLEASED with them) but I have now heard multiple stories of people who worked very very hard and thought exam had gone well and are receiving Bs instead of A*s, D's instead of B's, that sort of thing. I think the marking is much tougher and it isn't enough to slog your guts out in advance and know your subject inside out, have a tutor, do multiple practice papers.
Which is possibly why the universities have responded like sea anenomes, they now see that to get a C or a B doesn't mean that candidate doesn't know their stuff. It is more like the old days before exams were modular, linear exams were always much trickier because one poor paper would drag down your result and you had no banked AS to compensate.

Lobster how is the kitten?
Has it climbed your curtains yet? or fallen asleep in the bookcase

but I like the fact that they had that breadth of learning and it wasn't interrupted, whatever the result. It is just that we are still comparing our children's results with the results that people were getting 8 years ago, where 4 A's were normal in a bright student. Now they don't even do 4 A levels as a matter of course.

DD2 seems to have put the results behind her and is now focussed on going through the admin needed.

Does anyone else wonder if there is a factory somewhere specialising in producing non standard mattress sizes exclusively for student halls?