Stop calling me Mrs!!!

[everychildmatters]

Drives me mad.
Why the assumption still, in 2025?!!!!
Eurgh!!!!

Ironic that a later post highlighted that the sexism very much alive and well: women still aren’t considered to own their names. They’re always given to them by men.

And this is absolutely perpetuated by the decisions made by women to use Mrs and change their names on marriage, whatever the reason they do so.

If every woman stopped doing that tomorrow, other women wouldn’t be expected to.

@AmIHumanOrAmIAYetiStop shouting at me! You are just the type of insufferable woman I would never wish to talk to. A name is given to you. The vast majority of women get a family name and it’s a parent name, usually dad. I could not care less if you call yourself Ms Angry but this ridiculous angst and shouting is ludicrous. Every Ms I know uses a man’s name! Either dad’s name or husbands name with ms. My DDs use their names on their birth certificates and are Miss.

Every Ms you know uses their name, wherever it came from. Just like every Mr you know.

Are women expected to
I didn’t in 1998 and I don’t think anyone expected me to
although for some bizarre reason MIL double barrelled our surnames but she clearly made that one up all by herself

No one should feel compelled. There should be no expectation to do anything with our names or titles on marriage

I vote for a default
Mr and Ms ….keep it simple. Men and women then have equality

My surname was chosen by my parents. I didn’t have a say in that so I’m afraid using it as some sort of gotcha is a nonsense

You can be whatever title you like if you’re married. The old adage of everyone is Mrs is no longer the case
You can be Ms and Miss
No assumptions should be made just because you have a ring on your finger
( There's also no ban on any women putting a ring on any finger)

Why does it matter to you what title other women choose to use so long as people use your chosen title? It’s none of your business what I choose to call myself, any more than it’s my business what title you use.

Clearly demonstrated someone expecting you to have your husband’s name in some shape or form. I get this as well, despite being absolutely clear for 20 years that I don’t use any part of DH’s surname at any time. (Anything addressed to Mrs Hisname or Mrs Double-Barrelled gets sent back/binned.)

I’ve explained it in the simplest way I can. If you still don’t get it I’ll have to get the crayons out.

When I was married, I wore my ring for a while, then took it off. The ring is lovely - perhaps the nicest I've ever seen. I just don't like wearing jewellery very much.

Exactly 👍

You’re really very rude and you seem irrationally angry. It doesn’t affect you one iota what I call myself. It’s fine for you to not like women calling themselves Mrs, just as it’s fine for me to not like women calling themselves Ms. But the fact is that we live in a relatively free society and can both call ourselves whatever we wish. I chose to take my husbands name as mine when I got married and have never had any regrets about doing so.

All my original names - first name, middle name, surname - were my parents' choices. I can change any or all of them if I wish to, as long as it's not for fraudulent purposes.

No, after some thought I took my husband’s name.

All the fears of losing my own identity were groundless. It’s my name now.

agreed
doesn't change the fact that your parents chose them

I’ve never met a Ms and I’m not 100% sure I’d pronounce it right. I’m not young so maybe it’s generational.

I get it. It’s cool with you that women are expected to think about using a name and title to signal to the world that she is legally attached to a man, and men aren’t. They are far too important to have to consider such things.

Well, some of us can’t be arsed with that. So the options are that women push back, or men start identifying similarly, isn’t it? Why on earth would this be something to continue for future generations? Men aren’t complaining about it, so women have to.

🤣🤣 Women don’t have to complain about it. Most women I know really don’t give a shit and are worried about far more important things than this. I also know a number of women who are divorced or widowed and still call themselves Mrs 😆

Every woman doesn’t want to. I didn’t.

@330ml Not every woman (I didn't either). But still the vast majority.

Gosh. You really are a cheerleader for the patriarchy, aren’t you?

Telling women what they should be worried about now.

I’m from the uk and it does where I’m from.

Where?

Every Ms I know uses a man’s name! Either dad’s name or husbands name with ms.

By this logic it's not your husband's name. It's your husband's dad's dad's dad's dad's... name? Or perhaps there was an unmarried woman in the family tree, in which case it might be your husband's dad's dad's dad's mum's name? This argument makes no sense whatsoever.

Taking a husband's name on marriage is clearly not the same as keeping the surname you were born with. If you want proof of that, ask your average man if he'd be happy taking his wife's name.

I’m not telling women what they should be worried about - I’m telling you what I think and what most of the women I know think.