Disown by mum friends who I have known for 20 years due to my gender critical view.

[rouxelitee]

I am a bit sad today because I have been disowned by my group of friends who are mothers. I have known them since college. All of us have children, mine is a toddler.

One of them is a paediatrician. Let's call her JY. She supports the trans-movement for children. Recently she has shared an article with the whatsapp chat group on sexual and relationship saying that this should be how children are parented. https://www.nspcc.org.uk/keeping-children-safe/sex-relationships/
I didn't agree with the gender and identity section and I called it out. I said that affirming children in this matter will make things worst. The conversation escalated and she basically cautioned me that this is hate speech and if a doctor have the same view as I do, their license will be taken.

Fast forward to today, my partner and I are have been researching on local schools and their policies on the same matter, preparing ourselves for when our child is of school age. We found out that this school in Leicester has the following policy.

7.3 In accordance with the Equality Act 2010 we will not inform a parent or carer about a student being Trans or gender questioning.
7.4 Confidential information will not be shared with the parents and carers without a student’s permission, unless there are safeguarding reasons for doing so.
_
https://www.newcollege.leicester.sch.uk/force_download.cfm?id=3190

I felt that this is such a massive red flag, that I need to warn all my friends to look into their school policies.

JY then said "Much as I value our friendship, I do not have headspace to engage in these issues. I'll bow out of this group." A few others followed and quit the chat group.

They will possibly not talk to me ever again. I am very sad and I feel very alone in this matter, and that my partner and I and alone in this battle alone trying to protect our child from the state, the school and dangerous ideology.

I guess I just want to not feel like a crazy person shouting on top of my lungs "please look into this, this is bad".

Thanks,
roux

oh here you go. Let’s all play the gender critical “nothing is transphobic” game while you say all kinds of deeply offensive things about trans people. Thanks but no thanks.

What have we said on this thread that you think is offensive about trans people?

as above 😂

So, no receipts then?

You do realise that other people can read this conversation, right?

but ok I’ll bite. Here’s one - the first post I clicked back on in the thread.

“Wearing a skirt is what makes someone a woman.”

Also lots of references to people with dicks having feels…
I’m sure you’ll say another in a minute- I’ll be sure to point it out to you.

What makes someone a woman?

Do you think biological males should compete in women’s sports?

What is gender?

Why is it offensive to talk about wearing skirts? Many trans women express their gender identity through wearing stereotypically feminine clothing.

Many of them also say that they are women because of how they feel inside.

I've no idea why they think that what they are feeling is what it feels like to be a woman, but there you go.

Sometime women wear skirts, sometimes they don’t . Sometimes trans women wear skirts, sometimes they don’t. Trans people do not believe that putting on a skirt makes them a woman. This is an ignorant and offensive thing to say about trans people.

So what is it that they believe makes them a woman, if it has nothing to do with clothes, feelings or biological sex?

What do men think does make them a woman then?

calling trans women “men” is offensive to trans people.

Calling them women is offensive to women and yet they persist.

Trans people don’t know why they are trans, any more than I know why I am neurodivergent . They just know that they are.

no it isn’t and this statement is transphobic.

Knowing you are trans is not the same as knowing you are a woman. Being male and trans is clearly not the same as being female and accepting that you are female.

Sounds like you were being preachy and goady @rouxelitee. I'm not surprised your friends have chosen to disengage.

They didn't disown you. You are not being oppressed for your GC views.🙄

Yes it bloody well is offensive!

We are being told that we don't have a right to define ourselves in a way that doesn't include them. That we have to accept being defined as whatever it is they want us to be defined as, so that they can be included, rather than what we actually are.

It's incredibly offensive and that's why so many feminists are angry about it.

I don't know what they are identifying with because nobody can actually put it into words, but I'm fairly certain that it has fuck all to do with me, or with women in general.

If women asserting our right to define ourselves in a way that doesn't include the opposite sex is transphobic, so be it. But in that case, supporting "trans rights" is misogynistic.

Knowing you are trans is not the same as knowing you are a woman.

This statement is nonsensical.

For a trans woman it is the knowing that they are a woman (when they were born male) that makes them trans . This is what being trans is.

We are being told that we don't have a right to define ourselves in a way that doesn't include them.

Not at all. You can define yourself however you want. You just don’t get to define them

What's the word for adult female humans, Tandora?

We used to have a word for ourselves. That word was "women". They took it and used it to describe their identities, without asking us whether that was OK first.

So what's the new word for adult female humans?

No one is stopping you from calling yourself a woman. Your status is not under threat.

Status? Status as what?

No, nothing is stopping me from calling myself a woman.

But what is the point in calling myself a woman if the word no longer has any meaning?

Words are supposed to describe things. My intention in calling myself a woman is to describe myself as an adult female human. Female, not male. If the word "women" now includes male people, what is it describing? And what am I now inadvertently calling myself when I refer to myself as a woman? If "woman" is now supposed to be an identity, I need to understand what that identity is before I go round calling myself that.

So what the fuck is it?

If you can't explain what makes a trans woman a woman then I am not going to accept that they are women or refer to them as women, and it's as simple as that. I will continue to use the word "woman" to mean adult female human, and "man" to mean adult male human, which means the word "men" is clearly inclusive of trans women.

Only men can be trans women so...