Insomnia friends - I will sleep well tonight because I have told my unconscious I will

[BeckyBendyLegs]

And here it is!

Actually DH is coming around to the idea of ADs as he sees that I need a bit of a break from this stress I am putting myself under. But I've been skepitcal about them too for ages and ages (partly because I felt so crap taking fluoxitine). I've learnt a lot more about them though and recently found out my niece has taken and is back on the same sort you and CountryLover take as she says she has had big anxiety and insomnia issues. She also said, interestingly, she's never had any problems coming off them (one of my worries).

PST for last night: despite being totally hyper after watching the Big Brother (I know, deeply sad) first night I slept really, really well!' I was still watching TV at 10.30pm and DH kept saying 'you've usually been in bed ages by now!'

I feel poorly today though sore throat. I haven't been at all poorly since Christmas which I think is remarkable for me, especially given I have three bug magnets children.

I went to bed at 7 last night as I was so tired. I went up with DS who messed aroung till about 8 when we both fell asleep. Woke up around 5am so I guess i have had 9 hours which is good.
Am at home with DS today so have to be able to think straight and have energy for entertainment etc. Will prob see my sister later maybe go swimming or to the farm.
Sorry you are feelin rough Becky but good you slept well, what have you got planned for today?

Topsi that's a good night's sleep in my book!

I'm going to a friend's house for coffee this morning. There are four of us and we take it in turns every Thursday to host. It's one of the highlights of my week!

DS1 claims he feels sick but I reckon he's just concious that his friend is still off sick and he wants to be off sick too. He's eaten all his breakfast, bounced around the house being happy, made a lego helicopter and is now playing with his brother.

Ahhh time to go to school!

Actually I feel sick today sore throat and sicky. Yuck. I'm sure I'll be fine though.

willsurvive - my mum had restless leg syndrome which cause insomina for 13 years. (although the insomnia never made her anxious she just described it is annoying for having to get up for a couple of hours every night)

eventually she'd had enough saw a GP who diagnosed RLS and sent her for a blood test. her iron levels came back incredibly low. he said take iron tablets and once they're at a decent level the restless legs and insomnia will stop....AND IT DID!!!

she nows sleeps well but still takes iron tablets to maintain the correct levels.

it seems to much a co-incidence that you developed chronic imsomnia after having a baby where of course you lost a lot of blood. perhaps your iron levels have never fully recovered?

i know that it's not a magic answer or cure as it sounds as if you had a terrible birth experience which in itself would have caused some kind of post traumtic stress which in turns causes insomnia and anxiety. but this could well be part of the answer and some way to finding a solution.

i'm actually really excited for you!

ps getdown i know this seems like a crazy amount of money to spend but wouldn't it be amazing to finally get some answers and be given a solution.

becky sorry you're feeling rough today. i hope going round to your friends will take your mind off things. i know when there are sick bugs going round i'm really aware of any twinges in my tummy. it's horrible dealing with emetophobia as well as insomnia. i had both all winter. {sad}

but now my insomnia is better so is my emetophobia as i'm not so anxious all the time.

wow becky glad you had a good night's sleep, but that's annoying about your sore throat. Have you chased up your CMHT referral?

Hi topsi 9 hours sleep is fantastic, hope you are enjoying your afternoon whatever you decided to do,

countrylover - that is so interesting about your mum having RLS, and how it was totally relieved by iron supplements. I know my iron was very low after I had DD because I had a haemorrhage and lost a lot of blood. They only thought to give me a transfusion 5 days later! But after that I always assumed my iron was back to normal. I have never had it checked since.

I am still reeling from yesterday. I can't believe noone in the NHS has asked me about RLS before. But then, I can't believe it is my only problem. It couldn't have been RLS that landed me in hospital. But you're right countrylover it could be part of the picture... very interesting.

My head was so full of stuff last night. But I did manage to sleep which was amazing. Woke up at 2 but that is fairly normal for me these days and then got back to sleep again.

I am still worrying about the money. DH said he is going to sit down with me and show me his magic finances spreadsheet and prove to me that we can afford it. Thing is, I know we could technically afford it, and if I knew it would definitely sort out my problems then it would be worth it. But it may not...

CMHT appointment tomorrow. Gulp. Help. What should I say? I feel fine again now! How can I go from being in the depths to totally fine in three days?

Excellent, you have your appointment tomorrow!!! YAY! Honestly, this is the start of getting better for you becky I really do think it is.

Is your DH coming with you? He will be able to back you up by saying from an outside perspective exactly how it affects you.

Just say it exactly how it is... You wondered if you had PND, but it mainly manifests itself in insomnia and anxiety. The anxiety eases once you've had a good night's sleep, but you go downhill again very quickly and are caught in a vicious cycle. You wonder if ADs would help you and could they recommend one that helps with sleep?

What time is it tomorrow? I am really pleased for you.

Good luck for tomorrow Becky, they will prob ask you lots of questions. In those situations I try and just let it flow and not to be self concious about how I am answering. Who are you seeing?
I saw an SHO who said mmmm... alot then couldn't make a decision without talking to the consultant. They offered me yet another type of AD which I hadn't tried before. Said no thanks as i had started on my St Johns Wort by that stage. They refered my for some therapy though which was a good thing.
GetDown am dying to know what your blood results say about the iron levels.

hi topsi yeah me too, will be interesting to see what my iron levels are like. I just assumed the transfusion would have sorted it out, but I never had it tested afterwards.

I don't feel like I did when I was anaemic though e.g. I am not often dizzy, breathless etc. so I'm not sure they are low. Also I eat a lot of broccoli so surely my iron should be fine?

What did you get up to this afternoon topsi - it has been really grey and windy here so not ventured out. I had a friend visit who I was hospitalised with in the mother and baby unit. It was really good to see her, haven't seen her in about 6 months.

Totally know what you mean about the SHOs. I saw one a couple of times and she was RUBBISH. Clearly a trainee with no expertise whatsoever in mental health. She just kept saying "do you feel sad a lot?"... that was about her limit I think!

GetDown are you going to try the Magnesium? It would be a quick and easy thing to do that might help.
I took DS swimming with my sister this morning. Which was nice.
Then went to Tesco where DS climbed ontop of one of those trolley/car things, and fell off while we were standing in the que. I hate those situations where you feel every one is looking at you thinking 'she shouldn't have let him climb there in the first place'. I hate taking DS out to places like supermarkets or resturants because I feel i have so little control over his behaviour. We were out of milk though so it was an emergency.
Have you decided what to do about the sleep training thing yet?

Hi topsi yeah I should try the magnesium. Am a bit nervous though because my MIL bought me some magnesium spray a while ago and I came out in a rash and it was sore and red for a while. Maybe the capsules will be ok though.

Glad you enjoyed swimming. I always get really stressed out taking DD swimming - I think it's all the faffing around getting changed, lockers, getting dried afterwards etc. I ought to take her more regularly really. It's nice to go with someone though as then it doesn't feel so stressful

Don't worry about what happened in tesco. I know it's embarassing, but honestly people shouldn't judge. Anyone who's not had kids just doesn't understand, and people that have had toddlers, know just what they are like. Try not to let it stress you out. Hope he is ok now though?

Don't know what to do yet about the London sleep training thing. I feel really reluctant about the over night sleep study. The doctor said it's basically useless if you don't fall asleep. I think the chances of me falling asleep attached to all those wires / monitoring devices etc. and knowing that I was also being videoed would be very slim. So it could all mount up to a very expensive waste of money! He said, oh you will fall asleep in the end. Err, no I won't! I have gone whole nights where I've not slept at all before

He he, telling an insomniac 'you will fall asleep in the end' what is he like?
Is the sleep training just one night, in one of those rooms that you see on TV where you have wires attached to your head and all? Have always wondered how anyone sleeps like that.
I wouldn't worry about the magnesium, it was probably the sprey you were allergic to not the magnesium itself. Never heard if it as a sprey before.

The appointment is 12.15pm. DH is working from home but is going to look after DS3 so I can go by myself (double, triple gulp). DS1 and DS2 are at school and nursery all day.

Laughing at the 'you will fall asleep in the end' comment. That's soooo funny for the likes of us guys!!! I used to wonder how people who went to these sleep clinics managed to sleep attached to all those wires, etc.

I hope the magnesium works for you GetDown I am sure it has helped me sleep deeper than I did before I tried it. My sleep was non-existant or really, really light and ineffectual before I started on the omega and magnesium. I felt knackered even after a relatively good night's sleep in terms of hours.

Topsi I know those supermarket moments all too well!

I like these comments that medical professionals come up with... one GP I went to about my insomnia just after I had DD said 'oh no you will go mad if you don't sleep', which was helpful!

at Arcadia - I know that is exactly the kind of helpful comments they come out with.

One time in absolute desperation, basically having a panic attack after night after night of no sleep I called the out of hours mental health helpline.

The woman on the end of the phone just said "oh dear, have you tried a warm bath?"

It's a good thing I don't swear!

I know! and the same GP when prescribing me some sleeping pills after a couple of nights where I thought I hadn't slept at all said (thinking aloud!) 'I'm worried they won't work, I'm worried that nothing will work'! Cheers mate!

And this sleeping in a sleep lab thing, I'm not so sure, in that CBT book you recommended it says that people tend to sleep well because they don't expect to but I'm not so sure about that . If it was that simple you could try sleeping on the kitchen table and sleep well because you weren't expecting to!

Have been following this thread - interesting to hear about your experiences in full and really felt for you GetDown, it sounds terrible, but if you can get through that you can get through anything. Also interested to hear about your appointment; is RLS stress related?

Good luck with your appointment Becky it's hard but you have been up and down so long it is a roller coaster and must be wearing you out.

My sleep has been gradually improving really since the initial problem (having DD etc.) but I'm sure the vitamins etc. have helped (thanks Topsi). Am now back to 'normal' and sleeping 7 or 8 hours a night (sometimes more) but am feeling really tired. Do you think it's just because my body is finally relaxing? Or may be because I ran out of Vit Bs?

Oh but I'm still on the Nytol so technically not completely over it yet. That must be psychological now as my body must be completely immune to it.

I'm going to swear in a minute if DS2 doesn't eat his cucumber! He told me how much he loved it yesterday. Pah! Children and their changing eating habits.

GetDown that is tragically very funny. That just about sums up our crap health system really.

Arcadia I think you and I have both come sooo far. I remember seeing your initial threads and you replying to mine too back in January. Although I still have major wobbles every week or so, I feel so much better than I did in those days.

I am imagining us all now trying to sleep in the kitchen. He he he! Very funny. We don't have a kitchen table as such, a breakfast bar thing, very comfortable, not!

GetDown I feel awful, I was just going over what I wrote just now in my head and realised it comes across as really very insensitive. I sometimes let my mouth (or fingers in this case) run away ahead of my brain. I think what I wrote, above, was really out of order. Soooo sorry. I didn't mean to belittle your harrowing experience of having that woman respond in that way to you at a time when you were in great distress. Sorry

no, don't be silly becky It is tragically funny in a way. Just that she had so little comprehension of what I was going through and that the suggestion of a "warm bath" would solve all my problems!! Ha! I wish!
It would have been hilarious if I'd have stopped crying down the phone and said "oh yeah! Hadn't thought of that!"

It helps to talk about what happened to me, as I'm sure it helps you too to talk about what you've been through... if we can laugh along the way, so much the better

I do have a bit of a reputation for foot in mouth disease!

good luck with your appointment tomorrow becky....

will check in tomorrow to see how it went.

x

Thanks! I'm very, very nervous esp as DH isn't going to come too. I feel really fine again now so worried I'll come across as a fraud or something 'you're not really in need of our help, there are people much more in need of help than you' etc.