Liam Payne and why people only matter when it’s too late?

[Pomped]

I’m going through a very difficult time at the moment south my own depression and the news of this young man’s tragic death has impacted me a lot.

Reading the tributes to him, where were all these people when he was alive? It breaks my heart that if he were to understand the love and respect for him just a couple of days ago, things may not have ended as they have.

For me it’s one of the hardest things to reconcile. How do you access that love when you’re still here, battling as best you can but trying to be strong.

No suicidal thoughts btw - I’m just so sad and reflecting on why these things happen.

I agree with that

Couldn’t scroll past and not comment. Sorry to read that you’re struggling. I hope you can continue to be strong and get through this. If you have even one person you can confide in that is enough x

I was never a1D fan, never disliked them though and thought they were great on X Factor but Liam's death has hit me hard regardless.

I have lost a close friend recently so am still grieving for her so maybe I am feeling vulnerable but it just makes me feel so incredibly sad.

I 100% there are many other people to blame in some way for his death, not directly but the support is just not there for these young performers thrown into mega stardom overnight. Those who say they just want to be famous aren't necessarily right, they just want to perfect in front of people but a tiny % of these performers end up as famous as 1D. There is very little support in place, they have too much money, too much free time and some people are more susceptible to MH issues than others.

I was watching Mylene Klass on Loose Women on Friday and some of the things she was saying about her experiences were quite upsetting and it wasn't anywhere close to the scale of 1D. She has also been involved in making some big changes in the press over the years but there is a lot more than needs to be done.

I have a child who is a very talented musician, only on a small scale but he has already had a middle aged female stalker who we had to call the police about (they were absolutely not interested unless violent threats were made). We managed to hide it from him though as we managed most of the social media along with his PR company who were able to deal with it. We are also able to delete nasty trolls from his SM and block them from commenting further. How people cope on a big scale I just don't know.

There was a tweet shared by someone called Willow (handle is MattysBands) who a week ago said Take all of Matt Healys pain, triple it and give it to Liam Payne (or roughly those words). WTAF, this is the sort of stuff daily being said online, some much worse. This person then tweeted I'm SO sorry and retweeted the original post after Liams death. They have no remorse about what they said judging by further comments, in fact her post has turned into a death wish thread with people say 'do Donald Trump' etc. Absolutely shocking.

Liam was a father, son, brother, friend and was loved by so many, I don't believe he was a horrible person, he was an addict and that is NOT a choice. I have experienced two people close to me who were addicts, plus work in that area. It is devastating all round.

It is irrelevant whether it was suicide, whether he was high etc, his mental health caused his death in some way. There will be many people in the music industry knowing that they could have done more for him, they are not outright to blame but I am imagine it has hit them hard.

I thought Cheryl's post was perfect in the circumstances, I am glad she had the guts to say it also.

Why on earth should she not share her experiences? He had all the power and she was really young when the alleged abuse happened. Everyone has a right to share their side of the story. She is not to blame and it awful to have so many fans and random people blaming a woman for a man's behaviour.

What should those in the music industry have done that his family could not do?

Maybe we have no more young stars until they have had full mental heath screening? No alcohol supplied - ever? Keep people under close surveillance? It simply doesn’t work.

When people get very rich they make choices. Those who might become addicted do so. It’s trivialized and it’s called a “rock and roll lifestyle” it is seen as what musicians do. look at Amy Winehouse. Mama Cass, Jimi Hendricks, Janis Joplin, Jim Morrison and all the others. It’s those who are addicted to drugs and alcohol because they can be that suffer. If getting them to stop was easy, it would be done but self destruction is a MH issue and they need to want to recover. Parents, friends and the music industry cannot change them. They have to want to change. They could drop them but there’s royalties.

Why do we see it as ok to view Amy Winehouse drunk on stage? Why do we think Keef and Ozzy are the best? People adored the antics of Keith Moom. Why? Beats me - what have their friends done? Supplied them probably!

Surely this is exactly what posts like this are doing though? Blaming other people who may or may not have been around him for not being photographed with him and not being around him when he was alive, when no one knows if that was even the case. Celebrities are constantly flying around the place and have incredibly itinerant lifestyles. I sometimes don't see my friends for weeks and months on end because we live in different cities and all have jobs. It doesn't mean I don't love and care for them. Sometimes whatever you do it's not enough. Sometimes you have to look after your own mental health too and that may mean distancing yourself.

Also Liam could afford help. Not sure if he had professional help, but friends and relatives have no sway here. He has a dc but that didn’t change anything either. Wanting help and taking it has to come from within.