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Original poster

I cant stand the mess and i'm going to snap!!!

178 replies

zephyrcat · 18/11/2004 16:47

Please tell me that mine isnt the only house that looks like a compete shit-hole?!?! I'm sick to death of all the crap everywhere. DD's toys and clothes that she just dumps everywhere. dp's clothes on the floor that he cant be bothered to pick up and wash. No matter how many times i tidy it the house looks awful and its really getting me down. I dread anybody knocking on the door because its too embarassing to open it! I know you cant expect to have a toddler and an immaculate house but surely not this bad??? I dont know anyone else with little ones so i havent had any other experience of it. I've just filled a black bag with a load of toys pens figures and chucked it out and thats only one room!! Do you think it would be cruel to throw it all away? (obviously not all of her stuff!!)

OP posts:
juniperdropofbrandy · 12/12/2004 21:17

Wow, he's a clever wee soul Smile

albosmum · 12/12/2004 21:22

I think you must live in my house - feel exactly the same - I filled 4 binliners on sat - threw three in ds1 room and 1 in DH room. Intend to do same tomorrow - felt much better!

Keep doing the binliner thing!

happyspider · 15/12/2004 13:45

I completely agree with the mess is OK but filth not bit of this thread: our place can be a mess sometimes, but I could not stand dirt!

well... my question is now:
if you went unannounced to visit a friend/relative (in law) with kid/toddler , and you found a place in a mess, but bathroom and kitchen reasonably clean, would you think she's hopeless?
Just courious to know as this happens to us all the times and I feel just a fool always apologizing about the mess like I am some kind of earth mother who should always make her house look like something out of an ad!

happyspider · 15/12/2004 13:45

By the way, did anybody watch the programme last nigth about social services? there was this couple which kept their flat like a pit - crapping on the floor and all the rest and not taking the rubbish out for 4 years!!!- and their 4 year old was taken away from them as the conditions in the flat were a threat to his health, and all they kept sayng was: but we love him! - unbelieveble.

wrapmefestively · 15/12/2004 14:48

What????? You mean the parents were crapping on the floor rather than using the toilet???

Demented · 15/12/2004 15:41

It's smells I can't stand, a bit of untidyness fine but I hate anything that stinks. I had a friend in an area I used to live in who had hamsters, rabbits and cats who were kept indoors and her house didn't half honk at times, couldn't stand it.

Petesmum · 15/12/2004 16:36

Found some space & got our christmas tree up. One sucess! Not sure I'm quite as motivated to attack our "junk" room though - it's not harming anyone and I just don't have the energy.

OxyMoron · 15/12/2004 16:44

Haven't read all your replies, zephyrcat, but can completely sympathise. I had fantasies of having a tidy house by christmas, but there's not a chance in hell of that happenning! I'm a naturally messy person, but I do tidy up after myself. dh on the other hand is just messy and i can't tidy up after both of us. And i have a v. clingy 7 mo dd who at the moment won't even let me leave her long enough to prepare her food. And I go back to work in january, with still no sign of a nursery place. So my house is not even going to live up to the hell-hole standards i currently maintain. I usually hide when someone knocks on the door.

juniperdropofbrandy · 15/12/2004 16:57

No I agree about smells. I have two guinea pigs that live in and have to clean them out twice a week. But a friend of mine had one guinea pig in her house and I've walked in there and been almost knocked back by ammonia smells. I used to clean it out for her when I could, pick up her dog s:@t and clean her fish out. Her gp died quite young bless it but I couldn't do it all the time and feel a bit guilty. I can't understand having pets if you won't keep them clean?

I always have a clean loo, sink and bath and clean worktops. My floor's been swept today in the kitchen but I have to get down and scrub it tonight as it's in need. tbh that only takes 5 mins to do. I have clutter still in there but not as much as there was the other day.

juniperdropofbrandy · 15/12/2004 16:58

Oxymoron, you have a baby, so don't hide if people knock, give them a chore

happyspider · 15/12/2004 20:05

yep, wrapmefestively, they never used the toilet.
Apparently they forced the little boy to do the same in black bin liners!
The poor little soul really loved his parents and thought it was normal...

wrapmefestively · 15/12/2004 21:51

Were they a few straws short of a hay bale happyspider?

wrapmefestively · 15/12/2004 21:52

And were they otherwise kind to the little boy?
(you can tell that I am intrigued by this whole thing)

moondog · 15/12/2004 22:00

I worked with a family where all the kids crapped behind the sofa!!

Re the mess, just have a mad blitz (I do regularly and go berserk, throwing out everything)
Vet everything coming into your house with an eagle eye. If it will add to the clutter, DON'T let it in.

Ban outdoor shoes,pets,deepfrying and smoking in the house.

Open your windows wide for at least an hour every day.

Clean your windows. This makes SUCH a difference.

Never try to mask stale smells with air fresheners or those weird plug in things. Only makes it worse (rather like the girls I went to school with who would apply deodorant to steaming armpits immediately after a rigorous game of hockey.Yuck.

Oh! and don't crap behind the sofa..

wrapmefestively · 15/12/2004 22:48

I think maybe I have led a sheltered life....

moondog · 15/12/2004 23:08

Absolutely wmf! Haven't LIVED until you've met people who crap behind their sofa/into bin bags!

happyspider · 15/12/2004 23:49

This was quite a serious case, it was part of a new BBC programme on Tuesdays at 10:30PM called
Someone to Watch Over Me. Could not find the whole story, however this is a synopsy of last night stories:
""Each day, Bristol social workers deal with a huge range of referrals - from a baby with five suspicious rib fractures, to a four-year-old boy found living in appalling conditions.""

The four year old was removed from the flat and was sent to live around relatives, however the parents really seemed to love him and actually said that he was their only reason to live!

moondog · 16/12/2004 12:13

Yes,know it is no laughing matter really,but sometimes a joke is needed to carry one through some appalling situations..

juniperdropofbrandy · 16/12/2004 14:05

I've been to a friend's with some other mums this morning for a xmas get together, cakes etc.. and the hostess got the mini vac out whilst the kids had barely finished eating I thought a good friend of mine was going to internally combust

Mmmmmm now I know why mrs minivac has only visited me a couple of times

moondog · 16/12/2004 14:29

Afraid to say that at my worst I've been under the table with a pan and brush while people have been eating (until sisters pointed out that I was a sad sad little woman...)

juniperdropofbrandy · 16/12/2004 14:34

Do you need a new friend moondog?

Actually mrs minivac is very nice, we all have our foibles (well, apart from me of course )

moondog · 16/12/2004 20:49

Yes....I'm quite nice myself really..some say....

juniperdropofbrandy · 17/12/2004 10:39

I know you are moondog. You cook too so when can I come for tea?

popsycal · 17/12/2004 11:06

ho hum
can i join this thread again

after my brief domestic goddess phase, the house is a tip again.......

juniperdropofbrandy · 17/12/2004 11:09

Mine too popsycal. I had such plans for today though as DS2 is at pre school until 1.30 (party day)

Think I'd better turn pooter off and get a bit done, even if it's just one room. Fancy joining me popsycal? See what we can achieve and report back?