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Original poster

Need an outlet and people who understand

455 replies

Strugglingalone · 14/02/2020 19:37

Mumsnet keep deleting my threads and the last one had no reason whatsoever but the only way I am getting through at the moment is with random chat with people on here

Been struggling the last few days without a thread

OP posts:
bangheadhere40 · 25/02/2020 23:04

Hi, wanted to pop in and say hi to you both....

I don't think your care worker is doing a good job, could you go and see a new gp? Anything else you fancy chatting about?

bangheadhere40 · 25/02/2020 23:05

Oh and on tv the split is good

Original poster
Strugglingalone · 25/02/2020 23:14

She is brilliant, just bound by a mental health trust in special measures, before her I had had 13 care coordinators in 18 months, bar 1 other she is the only one who has really got me or stayed long enough to actually start doing anything - I really struggle to trust people and believe they aren’t going to leave, I know she is doing what she can but it’s just not enough, not when I am in tears like this every night but none of them see that, nobody does

OP posts:
icantstop · 25/02/2020 23:15

Could you call the Samaritans? Also there's a text service called shout, have you tried them? Text shout to 85258.

Have you been able to take your meds?

Original poster
Strugglingalone · 25/02/2020 23:17

Shout restrict me to one conversation every 48 hours and always end it early saying I need to get help - whatever I say to them

I text the Samaritans as struggle to talk on the phone but they give the same 4/5 generic responses and tends to make me more upset by not being listened too

I just don’t know where to turn now

OP posts:
bangheadhere40 · 25/02/2020 23:18

We are all listening...you can post here OP x

PurpleFrames · 25/02/2020 23:21

Hi Bang! 👋🏼 someone else recommended that show to me today, I'll have to catch up on it.

Struggling- that is appalling nothing less! I've had 4 in the same period and thought that was bad enough!...

Have you ever attended a&e at times like this?

Original poster
Strugglingalone · 25/02/2020 23:50

I would still say 4 in 18 months is bad I started kicking up a fuss about that point saying I had too many people, this one has been carefully chosen by the trust after I wrote a rather long complaint placed against NICE guidelines

I have been to a+e a few tones, it’s been recommended tonight but it will just make my anxiety worse, and often they pop there head in, day they are too busy and politely suggest you go home

Getting quite destructive tonight, not sure where to turn

OP posts:
Original poster
Strugglingalone · 26/02/2020 00:37

I don’t know what to do - crisis team are pushing me away, I’m in tears, scared of my head

OP posts:
Out4the · 26/02/2020 00:39

Hey strugglingalone just seen this thread didn’t want to read and run. Mental health problems are the worst. If u want to chat I’m more than happy to listen to what’s bothering you. Might not be able to help apart from a friendly ear. But I’m here and routing for you xx

Original poster
Strugglingalone · 26/02/2020 00:41

Thanks for responding, I don’t know what to do, no one will listen, I’m scared

OP posts:
Out4the · 26/02/2020 00:46

I have sent u a private message or we can talk on here the choice is yours xx

Myshitisreal · 26/02/2020 02:38

Just here to say hi, you're not alone 🤗. Split is a great show, I really enjoyed it.

Op sorry you're having such a hard time. Wish I had words/thoughts to help xx

Do you have anything you can do to keep yourself engrossed temporarily. Crochet, paint, draw, colour etc xxx

Original poster
Strugglingalone · 26/02/2020 02:53

I really can’t manage tonight, nothing is working

OP posts:
PurpleFrames · 26/02/2020 09:53

Morning OP
Sorry I didn't say bye last night I fell asleep mid message.

I hope you got some rest. What are your plans for today?

It's great tosee the support you've got on this thread. Do you feel like you need to contact the mh day staff today?

It's hailing really badly where I am- I actually quite like the sounds I find it relaxing. Does that sound weird? I guess it helps I'm tucked up in the warm duvet too

Original poster
Strugglingalone · 26/02/2020 10:09

Already phoned, they are in a meeting till 11:30, after about 3 tries I managed to ask to speak to duty (I really struggle to speak on the phone and the receptionist was male which mad it even worse)

Hail sounds nice, I’m curled in a ball, cried about 4 times this morning already

Only managed 2 hours sleep and the thoughts are just getting worse

OP posts:
PurpleFrames · 26/02/2020 10:37

Would you like to write what exactly the thoughts are saying? I can find at times it takes the 'power' out of them when it's zipping around inside my head.

What could we help you with until 11:30 when the meeting ends? Shall we watch the news or another programme together? Or compare boring breakfasts!?

Lobsterquadrille2 · 26/02/2020 10:46

Hi OP, I've just seen this thread and can completely relate to much of what you have described.

My breakfast was cheesecake. This is really appalling and I won't be sharing (either the fact or the remainder) with anyone else.

Our hail (Kent) was last night. I had to go to a meeting with soaking wet feet. Sunny and cold here today.

Original poster
Strugglingalone · 26/02/2020 10:56

I can’t share any thoughts otherwise my thread will be deleted

Not had any breakfast, don’t really eat when things are bad

Sorry

OP posts:
PurpleFrames · 26/02/2020 11:03

Oooh what flavour cheesecake was it?

I had jam on toast for the first ever time- it was lovely!

I would hope it wouldn't be deleted in the context of you not acting on them and us asking what the thoughts are. But it's your decision.

I'm watching the news as I finish my breakkers- it's all corona virus -rolls eyes-

Original poster
Strugglingalone · 26/02/2020 11:13

They have deleted my last 3 threads, this is my only outlet, I can’t talk to family or (lack of friends) so cant risk losing it again

I’m a mess after finding out samaritans text service has finished. That was my only lifeline

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 26/02/2020 11:15

Even thought the text service has finished, they still have an email service.

You can contact them at [email protected]

Lobsterquadrille2 · 26/02/2020 11:23

It was lemon cheesecake! I'm not even a cake person .... but it was lovely. DD made it last night. I shall attach a photograph if I can.

OP, fully understand your limitations with typing your thoughts. I used to find it helpful typing them into a Word document, with dates. Some years ago I was sectioned briefly and kept notes then, during and after. When this passes - and I promise it will - it can give you strength to look back on, when you are in a place where you want to remember. I hope that makes sense. Your 11.30 call is almost here. Hope it's helpful.

Original poster
Strugglingalone · 26/02/2020 11:28

The email is too slow, I needed the texts, I can’t speak on the phone and I find an email too impersonal, may as well be emailing my boss or a shop!

Really not coping today

OP posts:
Original poster
Strugglingalone · 26/02/2020 11:29

I doubt it will be a call at 11:30 that’s just when there stupidly long meeting finishes - finding it incredibly hard to speak on the phone today so not sure I’ll be able to get things across to her anyway

OP posts: