Parents of anxious kids/ teens support thread

[Stilllivinginazoo]

Hi
Welcome to parents of anxious/ teens thread.idea is to share tips and advice and listen and support each other on days things are getting tougher

Happy Birthday lil zoo !

I have only just seen this and have not RTFT due to laying in bed and reading this. My DS2 is really struggling with his anxiety at the moment. We have a "pre-assessment" meeting coming up in November for myself and DH to go to one meeting and DS to go to one for adolescents.

cantthinkofabloodyname welcome
How do you feel about things?was his anxiety a sudden thing or has he always been on the nervous side?how's it affecting him/you?have you other kids?
We are a friendly bunch.no judgement here

Thank you *Viking"

Philomenahope you got him settled early(and if you are already up that he's a little easier today)

Back to school here(except lil zoo who has teacher training)so best get up.i like to be fully on the ball before everyone's awake!!

bigbus I'm so pleased she gets a sense of achievement when she does things.ds doesn't,he just feels very self critical about what didn't do or that a basic tasks such a big deal for him..his dad's quite very negative person.i started pull him up on it(I don't mean critical of us just looks for worst case scenario in EVERYTHING .had text row last night because of him assuming how it would be today.hes convinced D's will spoil lil zoo birthday etc.as his upgrade phone is being given today(never did find where old one went)'m more hopeful tinkering with set it up and having that to distract will give us some leeway.he was also moaning how it effects his anxiety being around D'swelcome the club mate.suck it up and crack on!!!)

Hope those who have a school day don't have aterruibly bumpy start to the day!!!

Happy birthday little zoo

Happy birthday littlezoo! 🎁🎂🎈🎉🎊

Thanks guys!
Loved her gifts
(Ballet shoes as just started open ballet classes which were part of the gift.couple books and a my lil pony thing.ds got her a sister bag charm,dd2 a bracelet with her name on and dd1 cd,smellies and unicorn toe seperaters for when we are painting toes)
DS is now in borderline hysteria...think going to be an all but drag him to school😞it will only be worst it we don't even get to the door today

How did it go with DS zoo?

Philomena after total meltdown and lots cry and screaming at me we got to school.closed teacher training as he's not there full-time I don't get bloody messages for anything.grrrrrr

Oh no, poor both of you.

Philomena on plus I've pointed out relief felt walking home(after be angry himself hot so upset for nothing) will be same tom once he's done it and how quickly changed from can't breathe etc to start calm down(not fully as traffic etc still upsets him) proves it's not physical so silver linings and all that....

Trailing shops he was bit clingy gasping for air,but didn't keep saying have to go etc so I'd class it as a tried hard win..
He lost his mobile who knows how long ago somewhere in house and I can't find it anywhere! new one was due(upgrade)so it's luckily arrived and was given today,so that's helping distract him so lil zoo getting some attention(not as much as would like but dad gave her her tablet back for the day -was told not tilid Nov would we try again as has no self control when told to put it away n plays on it in night,lying it's been put away

I'm so lucky with mine, they've decided the tablets live in my room.

Dd2 is brilliant about put phone down at bedtime and leaving it downstairs,always has(can't get her off it in the day mind,but she's nearly 15 tis expected)
DS a bugger at night but that's cos don't sleep/anxiety I think.he gets off when told if has company/is downstairs!

Glad lil zoo had a lovely birthday! It's too bad there was no school but you're right Zoo - hopefully DS will come around that the symptoms are in his head .
Hope everyone has a relatively calm evening

DD was worried this morning, she's got a reading booster at 8, and she's worried about whether the teacher will come down and get her or she'll have to go up by herself. I said that the office staff will tell her.

Philomena hope things go well with the reading boosting!!
DS revving up,we leave in ten.ive given him his phone to play with(norm no tech first thing but he's ready so all we have to do is put on blazer and ear defenders!!)
Lil zoos day went better than I could've hoped for
It's freezing here,but disappointingly no frost.wouldve made for great views/ photos on the way to school!

I’m so glad to have found this thread. DS (13) has some intermittent school related anxiety. I am going to read the whole thread later and come back.

I specifically need to deal with Xbox and phone issues.

Hope you all have a good day.

seaviewbliss welcome
Minor victory here.ds did nearly 25 mins!!!
He took in a jewel beetle as a distraction and key worker was told if he found himself to anxious to write about his spider moult sighting he could talk about that,so he's still racking up time away from me/in school building

Not expecting everyday to be so smooth but nice to have at least an odd less bumpy start although I forgot lil zoo ment go dressed as a Victorian on her first day back.ooops epic mum fail

Oh, the amount I have to remember on Tuesdays now zoo:

Swimming kit
PE kit
Healthy snack

Did I mention that I have a shit memory?

Next Tuesday should be easier as DD will know what to do.

I've been frantically hunting around for DS2's Slenderman costume for tomorrow night, DH has tidied their room and I thought we'd have to turn it upside down. We have a fancy dress shop up our very long road, I rang them, they said they had one, I raced up there, the lady obviously hadn't understood me because they didn't, came back, found the costume! I need a !

Philomena what a kerfuffle!(sounds like my house)
Well attpts get D's do something like schoolwork has bombed out.that triggered panic in form "swirly tummyache" and full on panic attack as "makes him think about school"
Swings and roundabouts

He's now faffing on Pinterest after half hour in his room lay quiet watch documtary dvd.i really need clear up.have huge to do but will to live is ebbing away fast taking my motivation with it!!

Must get off sofa and start clearing up!!

Hi all. It has been enormously helpful to read your experiences. My DS has seemingly minor issues in comparison but still challenging.

I’ll get round to telling you about it but happy to be on this thread for now.

Glad you had a small victory Zoo

Phillomena DS has just announced his intention to go to a Halloween get together tomorrow so just trying to cobble something together!

Have a good evening everyone

Hi could I ask some advice please? My DD16 suffers with anxiety and I’m at a loss how best to help her.

She’s had a course of CBT and was put on beta-blockers as it got so bad during her GCSEs. She’s more settled now so I hoped she’d feel better but she tells me it’s getting worse although it doesn’t appear to affect her day to day life that much.

I have to be honest, a part of me thinks she’s labelled herself as ‘someone with issues’ a bit when in reality a lot of how she feels is perfectly normal. She wants to see the doctor again but I don’t like the thought of her relying on medication if there’s another way, trouble is I said this and she thinks I’m being really unsympathetic.

I want to help but a) I think she needs to help herself a bit and b) I’m not sure the problem is as big as she thinks.

Really welcome any advice as I’m not sure if I’m being unfair on her.

somewherenow welcome.i think we all have moments when we aren't sure what's MH and what just behavioural stuff
Does she practise any mindfulness or relaxation still?it's essential you keep doing these things long term
It's hard as they get older too as you feel like they're still your baby but at same time need take some responsibility for themselves.maybe accompany to docs and see what all the options are open to her?
Probably not the answer you were hoping for
Please feel free to talk to us any time you need to offload,if not on her I'm ok with pm me if you prefer
Seaview and to you also.offload things here and if you want a private chat pm me

We also take accomplishments however small.its good to share an achievement too!!

Tough day here.in trenches at mo so can't really explain....

Hope you're okay zoo.

DD started getting DS2 wound up again right before bed, she'd forgotten the routine of keeping things calm and quiet 3 hours before bed.

Seaview and somewherenow -Welcome .

Philomena hope the kids have settled for the evening.

ZOO I sound like a broken record but you really do have a lot on your plate. But Yay for the 25 minutes that DS achieved!. And you deserve a big bar of chocolate!

DS1 been off school for one full month now and still waiting for appointment with psychiatrist and school team.
Trick-or-treating tomorrow night and Halloween parade tomorrow at school and DS2 is being particular as usual.
Got doctor's letter today to return to work full time next week.

Have a peaceful night everyone