The lonely journey of anxiety - loosen the tight grip of fear. Support, friendliness thread.

[Aintgotnosoapbox]

Hello. I have been suffering with various forms of anxiety over the last year, and have had the tight grip of fear - at times all pervading and almost existential, at other times just transient and anticipatory, which has led to a lot of feelings of being closed up, strained, and losing connection with others. When this happens I get a certain type of chest sensation which feels like pure fear. Sometimes, I am tired and can't tolerate it. Other times, I feel free and in control of it .
My antidote to all of this is connection, mindfulness, self care and various other techniques I have learned along the journey.
What I have also learned is that anxiety states are very lonely fearful places to be so I would really welcome anyone , whether well emotionally, psychologically, mentally, or unwell emotionally, psychologically or mentally, to come onto the thread when they can with a hello, a message or a moan about their day, and maybe we will feel better and get better together.
I was given a lovely compliment today, that I have very good social skills, and make others feel better and empathise. I'm not perfect, in fact have had the most tremendous struggle recently, but am starting to feel alive again.
Come and join me in a path to wellness and connection. Life is short, let's beat this anxiety together.

I love headspace, though I haven't paid yet - have you subscribed taxi?
Just went for a beautiful evening walk :)

A beautiful evening walk sounds nice.

I've just had a hot bath. I feel quite relaxed. I rated my mood on my mood diary at 7pm and put it as a 5 out of 10. This is quite good. There was a time a few months ago that my mood was always a 1 out of 10 so I feel quite lucky to have improved so much.

I hope you all are having a nice evening.

That sounds relaxing calm, and you sound very calm and positive :)

I've been a bit too much ' in my head ' today , I hope that isn't a problem starting out as part time. It's a difficult balance to achieve between less stress and not too much unstructured time.

Anyway a relaxing walk in the evening sun was an amazing way to spend a Monday evening - how lucky am I 😍

Hi everyone, I'm feeling awful today, really down and anxious.
Not sure why I'm posting really.
I think I'm going to give the drs a call tomorrow and talk through the antidepressants again. I'm really struggling, and as one day comes to an end already have the heavy feeling of dread in my stomach in anticipation of the next.
Hope everyone else is okay.

Hi wizard. Sorry you're struggling. I understand the heavy feeling of dread in the stomach. I've just been talking to my partner about when I'm going to take DS for a haircut. I've decided on Friday. I'm already really dreading it

I hope you get a doctors appointment tomorrow. Trying antidepressants sounds like a good plan. I'm on citalopram. They have helped me an awful lot.

Take care of yourself tonight

Hi wizard, sorry you are feeling so low and anxious. Good advice from calm.
Sometimes it just descends and feels as if it won't lift- horrible feeling, but it will lift and you will start to feel better.
Take care 💕

Morning campers 😀

Wizard - how are you feeling today - Are you still thinking about calling the Dr. Hope you feeling better and slept well.
Calm- is there anything about the haircut trip that you can prepare for, or that is worrying you, or that we can help with?
Taxi - Thankyou for reminding me to get back onto headspace !
Velma how's things, guessing you are more settled? Hope so

I am feeling good today, am getting out and chatting to people which helps me - its as if I feel ' this is me' if that makes sense :)

Hi everyone,
I know I didn't reply last night calm & aint, but it was really lovely to read your messages - just to know someone out there somewhere is taking the time to read & reassure - thank you.
I'm really pleased to hear you're having a good morning calm
To be honest I had an awful nights sleep and seem to be in abbot of a slump at the moment - feeling sorry for myself really! Need to snap out of it. Doesn't help the kids are being a handful and the weather is miserable!
I'm going to try and get my drs appointment booked one day this week.

I hope you have a lovely day everyone

I'm sorry, I meant I'm glad your having a good morning aint! My apologies x

Hi Aint and everyone else on the thread.

I don't know what worries me about taking my DS to get a haircut. I'm just really scared and anxious about it. I've been trying to get DP to take him instead but he's having none of it.

I feel quite calm today and my mood is reasonable. I'm feeling hungry as I am on a diet and am not eating breakfast or lunch. I've got five stone to lose.

Hope everyone is ok today.

Calm - I've got three stones to lose. Going to start this week.

Good luck Aint. I'm gonna really try hard this time.

Checking in, I too have 2 stone to lose! I've really piled it on in the last six months or so, so much so that when I bumped into someone the other day she exclaimed 'you're pregnant?!' With a smile. I'm really, really not! I'm not sure who was more embarrassed to be honest, but I thought every woman knew never, ever to say that!
I've been putting off diet and exercise, how do you both plan to lose it?

Hi wizard. Sorry to hear you have weight to lose too. I plan to lose it by drastically cutting my calories, basically a crash diet. I know it's not a good idea and I wouldn't recommend it either. But it works for me. Today I had a couple of spoons of peanut butter for lunch and for tea I'm having a fish fillet and a few chips. I would love to look how I looked before I put all the weight on with the antipsychotics. I was a size 8. I would love to be a size 14 now. I'm size 18 at the moment. How do you plan to lose weight?

And sorry the woman thought you were pregnant, I always worry people will bump into me and say that!

Good luck calm, I hope you get to a weight you're happier with.
I just majorly overeat and snack constantly so I'm tying to just eat sensibly, cut portion sizes and I'm thinking of starting couch to 5k too.
BUT, I'm really lacking in motivation at the moment.

Hi all. Went to an activity tonight but had a slight problem, the person who introduced me to it and I became friendly with, was there , but I find she's not so friendly anymore. I genuinely don't know if I'm over thinking it, but I don't think so. She's very extrovert. This has happened to me before- I don't want her to feel I've latched onto her. It's a bit strange, because I see her, but she doesn't really talk to me if that makes sense.

Aint she was probably just busy so she didn't get a chance to speak to you. I don't think you've latched on to her. Are you going to be going again?

I stood on the scales this morning. I've lost four pounds. Which is good considering I drank 4 beers and had some toast last night.

I don't really snack or eat too much. My weight gain was purely from being on antipsychotics and possibly mirtazapine. I'm hoping to lose weight by simply coming off them. My goal is a size 14. Then maybe I can set another goal.

I hope you all are well today.

Hi all
I'm still about, but I'm in the lake district and have just picked up some mobile data so I'm just coming on to say I've not forgot you all.
I'm having intermittent low level anxiety feelings but nothing too debilitating.
I'm back home on Saturday so I'll be able to catch up then.

I'd like to join if that's possible? I've been struggling with anxiety and depression for a while now. I've been taking 60g fluoxetine for about two months and some days I don't feel too bad and others I'm terrified of leaving the house or opening the post. I'm trying to be kinder to myself but it's tough!

I am however envious of you being in the Lake District Velma - we were supposed to be going in July but my car developed a very expensive fault and we haven't managed it. It is however one of the very few places I feel almost completely calm.

Hi velma, it's nice to hear from you, I've been wondering how you're getting on.

Welcome Checked. I used to be on 60mg of fluoxetine. I did find it good but I sweated a lot as a side effect. I hope you are feeling calm today.

I feel quite relaxed. I was anxious earlier after going to the park with the kids (I have become quite scared to leave the house after stopping two of my medications). But the anxiety has died down thankfully. I still wish I had some diazepam to use when needed. That stuff really helps me.

Hi all, I recognise so much of what you are all saying. I developed OCD after I had my son. My mum died not long after that, and i also had PND. That's now almost thirteen years ago and I'm still struggling with anxiety. The constant exhaustion has to be one of the worst parts, along with what seems like an endless well of anxiety that comes up all day every day
In desperation, I've signed up to the Linden method. Kept to it yesterday and felt better, but today has been not so good. Need to keep at it, just find it frustrating that although the anxiety is less severe, and lasts shorter time, it still comes again and again. Such a horrible feeling
I've been debating going to the Dr again. And begging to be given drugs. But I'm so scared of feeling either in a trance, suicidal or them doing nothing. All have which happened before. Am waiting for CBT
Anyone else get really freaked out when people, especially men, shout? Twat next door shouted at their dog earlier, and it just made a difficult day worse. I never used to be like this, It's like I'm hypervigilant but also in a bit of a trance, so sudden noise makes me jump

It's the first time I've been to the lake district and some of the views are very grounding.
I've had a brief chat to my Dad about my anxiety and current topic of worry and he resoundedly said that he thinks it's an anxious thought not a true thought. His reasoning is that after being with somebody for 25 years without any other real issues you are a couple and for those that end up divorcing after being together so long is because the relationship has been wrong or flagging for years and he doesn't think that is the issue with me and my DH and that I shouldn't worry and just let the anxious incidents happen I.e.practice mindfulness, but in a no nonsense way from a nearly 70 yr old wise person. He lives his life by the saying of 'shit happens and you get on and do the best you can'

Thanks calm. I've been trying to go for a walk everyday as I'm not at work atm (summer holidays) and it does help.

I think sometimes with depression/anxiety it can twist what you think - almost that it's another way to torment yourself. But the motion of the water in the lakes is incredible. The most soothing sound and movement I think.

hello all, i haven't had time to read the whole thread but just wanted to pop by, tell you a bit about myself also share some things that have helped me - i've suffered with depression for a very long time, my anxiety got very bad around the time of my dads death, although looking back i realise it's always been there simmering away. i also come from a family with a history of mental health problems, both mom & dad suffered but many losses, traumatic experiences & lots of upheaval has caused major problems to my mental well being, over the past few years my physical health has been taking a battering as well.

as already mentioned here mindfullness is great but at my worse i've found that hard to do due to the incessant background noise going around in my head. when i start to feel anxious now i do the buteyko breathing method, it can be done quickly, it all relates to breathing through your nose & not through your mouth as mouth breathing/over breathing has been shown to cause problems. this is a good link about breathing correctly www.nopanic.org.uk/important-breathe-properly-help-anxiety/ i've noticed a reduction in my anxiety since i started breathing more through my nose & not my mouth.

another thing i found of great help when my anxiety was very bad was to have breakfast as soon as i woke up - i read an article that mentioned that anxiety can be worse first thing as blood sugars are very low, so it was suggested that you eat first thing, i never used to have breakfast, i used to wake up & go straight into panic, anxiety/depression mode, terrifying experience, anyways making that change helped. i also started to have a biscuit or boiled sweet when i used to get the regular middle of the night panic attacks, again because blood sugars drop low over night.

those are just a couple of things that have helped, also try to make sure you get plenty of sleep, if my sleep suffers so does my mental health, self care, getting out, eating & hydrating regularly all helps, easier said than done i know but try to be kind to yourself