Help! Breakdown, homelessness teen daughter.

[Vstressedtenant]

I am experiencing another breakdown. I have called crisis team and they are seeing me tomorrow can't see me earlier.

I'm scared. I may be going into hospital which I haven't before. I don't know what this entails.

My daughter has nowhere to go she is 16. We are a tight unit and have been let down by almost everyone else. Her father hasn't seen her in 5 years. But I suspect that's what everyone will tell us to do. He lives hundreds of miles away so it would mean her leaving school and friends and all she knows and me and I am scared he will turn her against me and I'll never see her again, never have the relationship with her I have now which frankly is the only good thing in my life.

She is an amazing person and doesn't deserve to have to deal with any of this.

I can't stop crying, shaking, can barely breathe.

Can anyone tell me what hospital is like (for mh reasons) what would I be allowed to take in/not allowed as I cannot be without my phone as I cannot be out of touch with my girl.

Can anyone please advise or help? I'm drowning here

Is your daughter with you at the moment? When is the landlord due to come?

Hugs Vstressed

I totally understand what you mean about the jump between crisis care and outpatient care.

Sorry, not sure that was helpful. Sending

LL due tomorrow morning almost literally crapping myself!

Daughter here has upset stomach don't know if nerves or bug

Erinaceus yes helpful as feel like nobody in real life getting it at all apart from my daughter because she lives with me and she sees what I go through daily

Whereabouts in the country are you? Pm me if you want

Are you actually meant to have left tomorrow or are you just worried about the LL seeing the mess?

Your LL is aware of your anxiety problems isn't he?

Ok so you are not actually homeless, it's just that the landlord needs to come in and do a repair, and because it's a mess you are worrying about what the landlord will say, and because of your illness, you can't cope with being in the house when the repairs are being done? Is that correct.

If it is then I am sure we can help you with more advice knowing the full picture.

I'm scared of putting 'full picture' as very identifying!

I can't cope with what LL coming to do. But it has to be done.

(((hugs))) Vstressed

It's very very very unlikely that anyone will recognise you from this. Honestly. Your landlord included.

Even if by any remote chance they did, then if they were fully aware of all the areas this is causing they would probably be more sympathetic and want to help too.

How long is the job going to taken them to do. If your daughter stays with you and you stay in a different room from the workmen would you be able to cope?

Do you have anyone at all that can come and help fill a load of the clutter into binbags and give the place a quick wipe over. Could the two of you do that today.?

Stress not areas. Sorry

LL knows about health issues told them before I moved on but I don't think they understood extent. Were sympathetic until recently. Or at least said they were. But now understandably worried about their property. I cannot be here when work done and cannot leave and come back.

But why do you feel you can't come back? Is it because you are worried about the mess and how they are going to react. I can understand that.

I don't know what support services are available. Hopefully another poster will though. But there should be someone who can help by perhaps speaking to the landlord for you and clearly explaining how ill you are/have been. But that once this work is over you will do what needs doing to get the place straight and tidy. It might seem impossible right now, which will add to your anxiety. (I've felt like this and I know how tough it is to pull yourself out of a downward spiral) but once a bit of progress is made it really will help.

Is it a hoarding issue, Vstressed? Why are the landlords suddenly worried about the property when they've previously been sympathetic?
Would you qualify for a homestart visit, do you think...
Someone just to help you do one big emergency declutter?

There is a partly hoarding issue yes though only realised that today

Which does indeed sound absolutely insane

No homestart or similar here

ok, so the first thing is to get it packed up a bit. Don't stress about throwing things away yet. Box it up. It will look tidier and you will be able to tackle it bit by bit. One box at a time in your own time, but for the meantime it will ease up on the clutter. Get your daughter to help. If you can keep busy it will curb your anxiety levels too.

Designate a space that you are going to use to put the boxes and make a start with it.

I promise that once you start a little bit it will get easier.

You can do this! You can do it for you and your daughter.

Thanks to all SO SO SO MUCH

Daughter gone to get boxes

I have to go to work now so please don't think I've lost interest in trying to help.

I will come back to the thread tonight. I hope you have a better day today. I've been in a similar place to you so I do know a little of how it feels. But I'm better now and I know you can do this too.

Don't try to be perfect, don't try to do it all at once. Start slowly with something manageable.

This time next week it can all be much better. And it will be!!