My heart is broken

[Wibhay]

I just had to have my beloved cat Rita pts. Part of my heart has just died with her.

its the "They are mine. go away!!!" look

oh bless they are lovely pictures!!!

Rainydaygrey - yes she did leave black hair everywhere!!!!
I don't want to go to bed tonight but I'm exhausted. I just took a hot water bottle with me and went and sat outside with Rita and just spoke to her for a bit.
So

Sorry to keep posting I just don't know what else to do with myself :(

Not read the full thread as I am crying too much.

Fucking animals.

They break your heart.

Again. And again. And again.

Get another.

Sorry ExitPurseudbyabear :( I think I've cried enough tears to cause more flooding in the uk :(
I never wanted this post to make people cry xxxx
I agree fucking animals break your heart. And I might be wrong for saying this but I've cried fewer tears at humans passing then this. Not that I don't care but for some reason animals hurt me more

it's ok Wib, i know how that feels. I paced, and cried and smoked and repeat. I was in shock the first day, cold and upset tummy. All part of it. It's two weeks tomorrow, and i can hardly believe it.

I haven't picked his ashes up from the vet yet. Can't face that bloody place again.

Mine was a black cat too, so handsome, and a total wuss. xx

Don't they just.

Don't worry about making people cry. it's brought tears of sadness to my eyes but also tears of laughter heating about the drive through!!

it might sound strange but reading a sad thread like this also makes me happy in a way because there's so much cruelty animals go through and although people are sad, it's so wonderful to hear from.people how much their pets are loved and had a happy life. they are all just so lucky.

it's lovely to hear and see so many well loved pets and the difference they made to our lives.if that makes any sense

Wibhay that is such a lovely story about how you and Rita found each other. Wasn't she a character! Love the photo of her with Christmas presents, she looks so proud of them.

I've just tried to go to bed and sleep and I can't :( every time I close my eyes I come over all panicky :( I'm so scared and upset.

I love reading your Rita stories - what a little star she was.

I realise it is of little comfort, but what a wonderful life she obviously had with you - adored, loved, needed. A real mutual love story.

The sleep thing is not surprising - I can't really sleep these days without a furry body tucked into mine. (I've mostly had Siamese and they always, in my experience, sleep in bed with their human.)

Maybe tomorrow, get yourself a picture frame and a little photo of her by your bed.

then you can talk to her and look at that beautiful little face every night.

I don't know how I'll ever get to sleep,I feel sick I'm just glad it's me in pain and hopefully not her

She won't be in pain.

If you can't sleep then don't. Just rest and read a book/watch a movie or something.

I take it you won't be working tomorrow?

I should be at work and if I don't go in I'll be in the shit as I was sick last week to look after Rita . I don't want to go in but the fire brigade are so strict with sickness and the amount of time you have off I feel my hands are tied

can you ask to be on light duties? or volunteer for something that ensures you won't be on a call out?

No they are very unsympathetic about that. It's just such a long shift 9am till 8pm and its miles away from my parents which is where I am currently. It sounds so selfish but I just don't think I can deal with everyone talking about what a fantastic Christmas they had. And a load of firemen aren't exactly going to be sympathetic over just a "cat" dying

Do you have a radio or anything which you could put on a timer to turn off after, say, 2 or 3 hours? Any times that I struggled to sleep, I used to put something on like radio 4, radio 3 or the World Service, anything which was quiet talking or music, set the timer, keep the volume quite low and lie in bed listening to whatever was on. To my surprise I usually did fall asleep eventually & the radio would turn itself off.

If you can't sleep it sounds pretty risky to drive all that way and then home again after a long shift.

Make sure you rest at least then. Difficult one for you.

if you do go, just make sure you take your breaks. give yourself some time alone.

sod their opinion. she mattered to you and sounds a better friend than that lot.

but if there's any way you can get day off. do.

I've tried the radio and listening to a podcast. I just feel exhausted but everytime I close my eyes I have these terrible thoughts and memories back it's awful :(!i feel so scared and lonely and panicky

I'm off to bed now. I hope yku manage to get some sleep. I'll be thinking if you tomorrow.

has been lovely to read your story about how you met. and the photos are adorable.

I'm so sorry you are going through this be kind to yourself and cry as much as you need to. x

You might be surprised how many people at work are sympathetic, anyone who's had a pet knows what it's like to lose one.

It does get better, honestly...I had one of mine PTS two days ago, we can be miserable together if you want?

Wib

What have you actually eaten or drunk today? (It's surprisingly easy to forget to get some calories inside you when you're miserable.)