morning all , thank you for messages , i went to the BBQ was very anxious must have changed about 20 x before leaving the house , but it was plwasent evening, some lovely mums there who were nice i was the quietist there but that was ok , late night for me in bed at 11 ...
my DD was so pleased i went as well she said she was so happy i came and meet all the other mumsn so i was glad i did it .
im debating to take a tablet now ot tonight again now ....i want to and i long to feel that feeling of an alarm being switched off , im on constant high alert ...and constantly tired and low ...tearful and just rubbish, so your experiences and advice is so very helpful and giving me hope that i can feel better ..
so i have to work tomorrow so do i take tablet now or tonight ?
god i long to feel normal ...
i really noticed last night how poorly my head is and how all these people were enjoying life laughing , drinking , knew so much more than i do about every day events , go on holidays , social events , loads of stuff ..
and stood out to me how iv spent so many months ...years locking myself in my head of negative thinking and anxiety , iv lost perspective on real life ...a life of fun ...
does that sound familiar to anyone ...nust get out of the house , this house is suffercating me ...or im letting it ...