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Original poster

can anyone hold my hand about to take my first ADs and very scared

153 replies

43mumof2 · 18/07/2015 09:51

doctor wants me to take them for y anxiety and depression , but im so scared about taking them ...anyone can help me through it , hold my hand ...shes prescribed citroparm (cant spell it ) not sure weather to take day time or night ?

OP posts:
EmpressKnowsWhereHerTowelIs · 25/07/2015 16:57

You're lovely, 43mum, and you deserve to be happier. Keep talking to us x

Original poster
43mumof2 · 25/07/2015 20:33

awe thanks empress , im just back from a lovely day out with my DC was my eldest 15th ....went shopping and then dinner tonight just 3 of us , as DH didnt want to join us all day ..his loss ...

so was lovely to get out and laugh with them for a while Smile

going to take my pill tonight ......so hope will be ok and will feel ok tomorrow .Hmm

how are you ?

x

OP posts:
EmpressKnowsWhereHerTowelIs · 26/07/2015 07:44

I'm fine, glad you had a good day yesterday. How did you sleep?

YouFargingIceHole · 26/07/2015 08:17

That sounds like a lovely day. So glad you were able to get a break (hopefully) from all the worry. I hope you're feeling ok today.

Original poster
43mumof2 · 26/07/2015 09:32

feel rough as a dog this morning ...and didnt sleep to well ..... when i feel like this i doubt i can carry on... slightly upset tummy to this morning to , making me worry , plus think i have acid reflux think i had this before tablets , yuckie taste in my mouth at times and could gag a bit ...sorry TMI ....
looked things up and convinced i have stomach C now as well as Bowel C ...

just feeling sorry for myself , sorry guys .. x

OP posts:
EmpressKnowsWhereHerTowelIs · 26/07/2015 21:29

((((((()))))))

I'd honestly stop looking things up... I've been down that route! How are you feeling now?

temporaryusername · 26/07/2015 22:45

I think it is a bit trial and error when you take them, I have found sometimes found they interrupted sleep a bit, but mostly not. Even when they did, that wore off after a while. If you're getting unpleasant nausea or other symptoms your GP may be able to give you something to help with that while you get used to the meds. Hope it is going ok.

Original poster
43mumof2 · 27/07/2015 07:17

i didnt take tablet last night iv felt so rough in tears most of yesterday Sad , iv got a doctors appointment later today will talk things through with her , i just feel awful , please dont think bad of me , i just couldnt carry on ..maybe theres another i can try , thank you for all supporting me x

OP posts:
LosingNemo · 27/07/2015 17:53

How did it go with the doc?

Don't worry about being judged, I think everyone on here would sympathise with your symptoms and your anxiety. I hope that you feel better after talking to the doctor Flowers

EmpressKnowsWhereHerTowelIs · 27/07/2015 18:26

None of us are judging you, you're doing exactly the right thing! Let us know what the doctor said.

mjmooseface · 27/07/2015 18:37

I'm still here 43mumof2 :) I've been following the conversation along. I'm sorry you're having such a tough time taking ADs at the mo. But well done for persevering. I've taken 10 consecutive pills now and am feeling a lot better. I had two consecutive days of bad headaches but paracetamol cleared them right up and I've not had them since. I feel fresher and more awake in the mornings. I have cleaned the bathroom properly - something I hadn't done in actual months! And cleaned the kitchen from top to bottom. I have felt more energy in my body. I have felt a bit calmer. I still feel a bit anxious and gets knots in my tummy and my appetite hasn't been the best. I'm mostly craving sweet and chocolatey things. But I'm keeping on!

How did it go with the Dr today?

temporaryusername · 27/07/2015 19:01

I hope the doctor's appt was helpful. You could always try something like Sertraline instead. It often takes people a while to find the medication or to get used to them. Sorry you're feeling so upset, you'll get there Brew

Original poster
43mumof2 · 27/07/2015 22:25

thanks everyone , Flowers still felt rough today but better than yesterday ...the doctor was lovely suggesting i take half the 10mg would be one option and build myself up to higher level ...or to try another type ...
im feeling low for stopping letting myself down ...but i felt so awful ...i never want to feel like that again ..... Sad
i just dont know what to do at the moment ....im feeling like last week was a nightmare and the thought of going through it all again is so scary ...but i know my anxiety is still there and will surface its ugly head again soon ....

thanks for listening to me and support xx

OP posts:
Original poster
43mumof2 · 28/07/2015 07:38

feeling utterly awfull this morning , so anxious cant stop crying .... i cant seem to get perspective ...could this be the ADs as im not taking them ...i feel so awful , i dont get ant peace only when im asleep ...Sad

just want this all t go away , sorry just dont know what to do x thanks for listening x

OP posts:
Original poster
43mumof2 · 28/07/2015 08:55

maybe i should try a different one ?as some just dont suite everyone , this one is generally very good for most so, so dont want to put anyone off trying it , and i shouldnt dismiss all of them should i as they help a large majority of people ...its just that first hurdle iv got to get through ....and with my anxiety thats such a scary step ..
but i do know i need to ...to get well ....

OP posts:
temporaryusername · 28/07/2015 22:51

You don't have to take any of these medications. It is your decision, no-one will force you to and you should be able to access talking/behavioural therapies without taking the medication. Personally I do think you should take something, because while they are not a cure and are not always the right long term choice, ADs can be a massive help in getting out of the place you're in now. If you choose not to take them, that is going to potentially make things harder for you.

It is a difficult irony that your anxiety is focusing on taking the medication. You have already managed to take a few days though, which proves you can do it. You did really well, don't be too swayed by a setback. Maybe this drug wasn't right for you, or maybe the side effects would have passed. Maybe the symptoms were very influenced by your worry about the drug.

Do you think that whatever has been going on, a fresh start with a
different drug could make you feel more confident about trying it? I know it is really hard, but you're right about that first hurdle. What most worries you about the side effects?

Original poster
43mumof2 · 29/07/2015 07:56

it was feeling so sick with them that i couldnt cope with i couldnt eat , i got panic attacks like i wasnt in control , i am frightened of going through it again to be honest Sad
some people dont get any at all and i know are very good on citalopram , so im not knocking the tablets , but perhaps they just wernt right for me ...the thought of another week or longer i just couldnt cope with , i couldnt function very well at all .
i know i need to take something but which ones from here i dont know ..i will recover from these and see my doctor again for advice as i know its not going to go away these feelings for long

a bit calmer today at the moment , practicing breathing and trying to keep calm .
trying to help a little ...

OP posts:
EmpressKnowsWhereHerTowelIs · 29/07/2015 08:28

I know some people have said citalopram doesn't work for them, so I think asking your GP for something else is definitely a good idea. I'm glad you're feeling calmer today x

Original poster
43mumof2 · 29/07/2015 08:55

thanks yes iv seen a few threads on here also stating that , everyone is different ...i just couldnt carry on like that i felt so awful , the doctor said another week and would have got better , but sometimes it takes 4/6 weeks and thats all the school holidays , i dont want the kids to see me like i was for all that time , so yes will see doctor and get more advice on what to try next , x

OP posts:
temporaryusername · 29/07/2015 16:38

Yes, and mention the nausea to the doctor, she may be able to give you an anti nausea medication to tide you over. It could be panic related, but if so placebo effect may still help. Never turn my nose up at a good placebo Smile!

Give yourself a little break and then see her about something else...Sertraline perhaps.

Bellini12 · 29/07/2015 17:29

Hi 43. You sound just like me in the beginning. Terrible nausea, weight loss I couldn't afford, panic, exhaustion. It was just awful! I went down to 2.5mg and still got all these effects. I'm sure that amount would hardly register with anyone else! It took me 5 weeks to build up to 10mg. With each increase I felt dreadful but it subsided after 5/6 days.

It is not for me to advise you, but with hindsight, I think they did me more harm than good as I felt consistently rubbish. I believe I needed something short term but it wasn't CIT. Indeed, I had to take lorezepam (great, but bugger to wean off) and beta blockers just to get through that patch. You have done considerably better than me!

Bellini12 · 29/07/2015 17:32

I still find it hard to believe that for someone suffering from extreme anxiety, we are prescribed a pill that RAMPS UP the feelings of anxiety & panic (I'd only had one panic attack before I took the pills - on them I had loads).

Oh forgot to mention I was prescribed diazepam too!!

Original poster
43mumof2 · 29/07/2015 20:17

thanks temp , yes going to recover from these and go back to talk again as there may be other options ... just right now im so scared and still not feeling right ...
iv heard good things about sertraline ..

Bellin12 , yes think i caught your other thread the other day , yes does sound so similar , you did so well to get to week 5 ! sounds like youv been through it to ... i only managed day 5 and i just couldnt continue ... Sad i so wanted to but iv never felt so rough ..i was fading away in just 5 days , i hardly ate as felt so sick ...by the time i felt semi ok was late evening ...then was thinking id have to go through it all again the next day ...
and friday i had a awful panic attack was horrid i never ever want to feel like that again ...so i dont think this particular one was for me , sadly as i kmow it works for so many , my sister is on it 20mg and cant beleive iv had side effects ...and shes had none ...
i still now dont feel right , but better than i did ..just goes to prove we are all different i guess but am a bit scared to try anything els ..but i know i need help ....

what are you taking now ? or are you not ? x

OP posts:
LosingNemo · 29/07/2015 21:14

Just wanted to check in and say that I'm still here. Still rooting for you. I have total faith that whatever route you choose to take, you'll get through xxx

Bellini12 · 04/08/2015 19:33

Hey 43, just wondered how you were getting on and if you have been to the Dr to swap to another AD?

I'm doing well, I haven't messed around with my dosage so am staying on at this level (5mg/7.5mg alternate days). Luckily the symptoms have passed (for now until I drop again). It's actually the best I've felt all year!