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Anyone around for a hand hold, waiting to be assessed under MHA

298 replies

creamhearts · 21/02/2015 15:00

Title says it all, waiting to see if I will be sectioned.

Tried to kill myself this morning and DH had to 'save' me.

Cut twice this week needing stitches.

Everything is a huge mess.

Hate self.

OP posts:
MrsMinton · 21/02/2015 17:51

No you sound like you look after yourself. I dye my hair (bright pink) and get my eye brows waxed. I'd love to get my nails done. I'm not very good at spending time and money on myself. This year I'm determined to though.

I like chick lit and sci fi. But I would read a cereal packet if I'm bored!

Ok.

PenguinTuxedo · 21/02/2015 17:53

Creamhearts sorry to hear you are struggling so much, and feeling so low.

My best friend suffered from mental health issues, but he hid it from everyone. It only came out when he tried to kill himself last year. He spent 4 long months in intensive care, and when he was awake, he regretted his decision so much. He made a permanent decision based on temporary feelings. There was nothing so bad that we could have helped him through. Unfortunately, it didn't have a happy ending for him.

I can't help but think if he had been open about how he was feeling and gotten help at the time, he'd still be here now. So I think you are being so very, very brave. You're taking such a positive and big step by admitting, even to us, that you're struggling. You're getting help, and that's a huge step.

I have no experience of being sectioned, although I have had mental health issues myself. I don't think you should feel that being sectioned is you failing somehow though. If you were really unwell physically and had to be admitted to hospital, say with meningitis for example, you'd let yourself be admitted and accept the treatment and help without question. Mental health should be the same. It's still an illness, not something you can control. So if they offer you help, please accept it. I know it's easier said than done though.

You sound quite scared and anxious at the moment, but try and focus on the positives. You said your dh is really supportive - that is lovely that you have that. Hold on to it, and let him support you anyway he can. Flowers

Have you heard anything from the psychiatrist yet?

creamhearts · 21/02/2015 17:56

I cannot agree to be in hospital. It is shit and boring and I hurt myself.

But I hurt myself at home too :(

I am sorry your friend died penguintuxedo :( My thoughts are with you, I hope my post is not upsetting for you.

MrsMinton I am in awe of pink hair. I dye mine dark brown, very dull.

OP posts:
Lemondrizzletwunt · 21/02/2015 18:03

I too would love pink hair!

And cream, I love all those things too, especially reading and eating! Would like to take better care of myself though my legs need a serious shave, they are currently sporting their winter coat

Lemondrizzletwunt · 21/02/2015 18:07

Cream, spend the time in hospital perfecting contouring, giving me beauty tips, and dying your hair pink a la Mrs, instead of hurting yourself Smile

Loveisashadow · 21/02/2015 18:08

I've got dark purple hair. Cream, it sounds as though you need some very, very safe space at the moment. I think the mental health team know that don't they? I'm glad to see you are taking your meds though. I had Diapazem when I was at my worst...crisis used to tell me to take it every time I rang (!) I really feel for you and what you ars going through, this sort of illness is so cruel isn't it? Forgive me for asking this, and ignore it if you want to,but apart from not being here, when they asses you, what would you like? Sleep, a safe place, some ons to talk to, meds? Xx

MrsMinton · 21/02/2015 18:08

Cream I bet it's shiny lovely hair. Lemon I've hibernated my razor too.
Penguin. I'm sorry to hear about your friend Flowers

If you have access in hospital we can talk to you there. Or Ebooks or music. Hurting yourself anywhere means you need support at the moment.

PenguinTuxedo · 21/02/2015 18:08

Creamhearts it's not upset me, I feel it's just great that you are actually reaching out to people and talking etc. Something my friend never did. Also, if his story can help you or anyone in anyway, then I am happy to share it :)

If you want pink hair - why don't you go for it? Grin I'd be very jealous! I want pink streaks in mine, but as I work in a school it's not allowed, boo :(

Has your film finished?

PenguinTuxedo · 21/02/2015 18:10

Thank you MrsMinton

MrsMinton · 21/02/2015 18:10

Love your hair sounds lush.

creamhearts · 21/02/2015 18:16

Now watching Ghostbusuters 2 Blush

I had plum hair in my 20s but now prefer it dark. I am meticiulous about leg shaving though (although you can't do it in hospital :()

I don't want anything. I want to be left alone to die.

OP posts:
Lemondrizzletwunt · 21/02/2015 18:19

Can you wax or sugar instead if they section you? It sounds like not being able to take care of yourself would just make you even more unhappy while you're there...

MrsMinton · 21/02/2015 18:21

Double cheese!!

PenguinTuxedo · 21/02/2015 18:26

All I can say cream is that I'm so sorry you feel you want to die. I've been there too, and I remember how awful it was, the complete loss of hope or happiness and just wanting it all to end, and trying to end it.

Just remember that 'this too, will pass'. With the right treatment, help and support, I am so sure you'll feel better in time. I know you might not be able to believe this right now though.

Have you thought about getting a little bag together just incase they do section you? You could take some pampering stuff in, like nail polish etc (if allowed) and some books to keep your mind busy.

Loveisashadow · 21/02/2015 18:29

It must be a 20s thing Cream, I'm only 28. Grin
Well done for talking to us all still. It must be so so hard for you at the moment. I am waiting for my dd to come back from my friends, bit list without her, it's strangely quiet in my house!

I've never seen Ghostbusters Blush

creamhearts · 21/02/2015 18:31

I have stuff for the hospital, nail polishes, remover, a kindle, some colouring in stuff. Just don't want to go. Want to be at home and die. Waiting until DH is asleep.

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MrsMinton · 21/02/2015 18:32

Loveis I had purple when I got married at 29! Ghostbusters is great on a rainy day with a lot of chocolate.

You're doing great cream. Thank you for staying.

creamhearts · 21/02/2015 18:33

See I am 30 and so I am too old for crazy hair ;)

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MrsMinton · 21/02/2015 18:34

I'm 40...Grin

PenguinTuxedo · 21/02/2015 18:35

Have they still not called you back Cream?

Purple hair for your wedding must have been awesome MrsMinton!

MrsMinton · 21/02/2015 18:39

It matched my dress penguin.

Could you or have you eaten cream?

creamhearts · 21/02/2015 18:43

No no news :( Maybe they have forgotton about me

DH is cooking suasages and mash. Will try to eat.

OP posts:
MrsMinton · 21/02/2015 18:44

Mmm mash. Just a bit might help.

Maybe after tea DH could ring again. Although they'll probably turn up mid forkfull.

creamhearts · 21/02/2015 18:49

Probably,

Do you think if I lie and say things are ok they will believe me?

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Doggygirl · 21/02/2015 18:50

Hi Cream - sorry you are unwell.

I have bipolar and a whole shopping list of other MH issues.

It's a bastard :(