Being Mentally Normal: The Theory and The Actuality

[Mitchy1nge]

we must be on part 11 or something by now?

Yes, but only superficial stuff. I know it's me causing the issue, she had no idea beforehand, but she is still angry and generally just unhappy with me.

Thinking of you, caulk I hope they ring soon if they haven't already.

Yep, they rung about ten minutes ago. They reminded me to look after myself and to contact them tomorrow and someone will come out if I would like that to happen.

I've hesitantly said "No, I'm fine," but also very aware that I'm not, so I'll see how it goes.

That's sad about the friend :( I guess she has her own stuff which may all impact on your current relationship, but I'd like to think I wouldn't abandon a good friendship like that
The crisis team sound a bit shit. I'm trying to remember if I ever called them, I don't think I did, but I once had someone come round (after the GP was concerned, I think) and ask me lots of questions (many of which were whether the dog (who was shut in the kitchen) was safe!)
When do you next see your therapist?

I hope you cope overnight.

I'll see her tomorrow. In the past I has a week of visits from htt and I had three visits to the crisis team place after coming out of hospital, but that's it so I don't know masses about what happens.

I'm pleased you are seeing her tomorrow, it sounds like she's very good for you. I curse my therapist sometimes, because she makes me work hard, but i know its good for me

I'm still struggling with not sabotaging. OH is away now until friday and I resent it, but needs must. There are lots of things in our relationship that need addressing, but there are better ways..

hope you are ok caulk (and everyone) crisis team were shockingly unhelpful when I called them for #2 once, never called for self but have found them nice and helpful when they are involved, bringing drugs to me, chatting shit etc

Monday not off to a great start, #3 missed transport to school and I'm still groaning and feeling sick and had to cancel running group. Maybe will be up to a little one by myself later.

What's happening in the lives of my mentally normal peer group today?

can only remember one question from today fully enough to reproduce

a bipolar 1 patient in a severe treatment resistant depressive episode is going to have ECT, they currently take olanzapine fluoxetine lorazepam and zolpidem (and probably others I have forgotten), which med should you discontinue before ECT?

Zolpadine or olazipine I think, but only because Ive never been on them so haven't read the info thing.

nah it's lorazepam cos it's a bit anti-seizure

there were more interesting qs but have forgotten them

how's Monday so far caulk?

There have been better Mondays.

I've ignored two phone calls but I'm about to force myself downstairs for coffee because caffeine will help more than answering the phone.

How is the general sickness and pain?

I think it's going away, porridge with berries and almonds seems to have helped. I think it was the tramadol, maybe veterinary preparations are different somehow

teen has a head full of snot so she can stay home and do the horses this afternoon, we will start again tomorrow (am always Starting Again Tomorrow)

Starting again tomorrow is much better than starting again next week.
I'm busy not ringing the ed people or the health check people back or getting angry at the friend for moving my car.

Woke up at a reasonable time today (a miracle since I was round at Mavis's playing cards until 11pm). Then rolled over and fell back to sleep.

I should get out of bed and go to my support group, shouldn't I?

On the plus side, I think I have finally managed to communicate to Mavis that, while she may function fineish on four hours' sleep a night, and considers five a lie-in, I can't get out of bed on less than ten hours when I'm medicated.

On which note, does anyone have any experience with requesting stimulants from psychiatrists? I am not sure how to broach the subject with mine in a way that doesn't seem like recreational drug-seeking.

I told mine that I was too drowsy on mine and sleeping too much, and he said to try taking them earlier.

I already take mine as early as possible, because I was struggling to get to sleep. But that might be because when I started on them they had that odd slightly agitating side-effect, and they are a bit stimulating for a few hours. Strange combination of stimulating and sedating

Did you make it to the support group?

Did/are you going Enpoid? I can empathise re: needing 10 hours sleep. What are you doing instead, Caulk?
Starting again tomorrow sounds good, mitch

I'm trying to get going on the maths, 10 days til an assignment deadline.

I had a visit from the crisis team, who said to have warm drinks, watch "untaxing" TV and have a warm bath to relax if I needed to.

I've also sorted out an ed appointment thing, realised I'm Too Fat to go there and had a cry about how shit it all is.
My life is thrilling right now.

Is that all the crisis team does? Even I could tell someone to do that and I'm not trained in...crises...

I'm sure you're not Too Fat. Honestly, when I was there there were people of many different weights and weight is a rubbish indicator of severity anyhow. My friend died from heart failure, brought on by bulimia and she was within the normal BMI range
hugs

I've taken DD to soft play and out some stuff in the attic and sorted DD's old clothes out. Just trying to keep the motivation going so I don't crash
I texted therapist this morning, but she hasn't replied. Trying to tell myself she hasn't seen the message/is shit with her iPhone (she's about 103, bless her), not that she's Fed Up of me. Even though I'm very fed up of me right now

Enpoid, what sort of stimulants were you thinking? I've had Ritalin before (man, that was Good Stuff, I could do the jobs of three people)

Well done for texting. She will have just not seen it yet.

Made it to support group. It was helpful, actually. It's a bit weird, though. Everybody tells me they think I'm bipolar - family, partner, other service users with BP, other service users with PD - except my psychiatrist, who remains astonishingly noncommittal Dunno what to think any more Can I have a diagnosis of Recurrent Depressive Disorder with occasional hypomania?

WRT stimulants, I was wondering about methylphenidate, dexamphetamine, or modafinil. Unlikely to get any of them, though.