I agree with you Fluffy - I too find it naïve when posters frequently urge people to go to A & E and ask for the "duty psychiatrist" - really? Don't think such a person exists - certainly not in the Mental Health Trust in my area.
My experience of suffering a severe depressive episode that landed me in hospital for 3 months started with a visit to the "Out-Of-Hours" GP and my friend with me. I remember having my head on his desk saying "I just want to die" and looking up to see him engrossed in his lap top.........he then asked my friend if I was suicidal and said if I was he couldn't treat me, I needed to go to A & E, said he's send them a fax - so we went there (it was 8.00 p.m. on Sat before Easter Sunday 2010) and a horrible receptionist saying to my friend in a bored voice "how long has she been like this..." I was then seen quite quickly but this was part of the triage system to see if I really needed the "crisis team" and he obviously thought that I did, so I waited and waited and waited and was vaguely aware of people with cut fingers etc sitting around. At 11.00 p.m. I finally saw the "crisis team" which was a CPN and a doctor (I found this out later as they didn't introduce themselves) and wouldn't let my DP or friend come in with me. They were only interested in whether I was a suicide risk (which I suppose is fair enough) and during the long wait my anxiety had subsided a fair bit, SO they sent me off with 2 x 2mg diazepam, and said someone had to collect some more from the hospital the following day - and to see my GP when they opened on the Tuesday after Easter.
My DP went to the GP surgery at 8.00 a.m. as soon as they opened but no one was allowed in until 8.30 a.m. and by the time he got in they said there were no appointments left. I have no idea what he said but about 9.00 a.m. a lovely young male GP came into my bedroom and knelt down by the side of my bed and held my hand. I was wailing that I was "so sorry" etc and he was telling me not to apologise. He prescribed more diazepam and said he's get a CPN to come out and assess me later in the day. He phoned later and said there was a change of plan and the consultant psychiatrist was coming out the following day.
Well HE came.........he was a large rotund man who didn't look at me at all, just sat asking questions and writing everything down. I was sitting shaking by the side of him and he ignored me completely - and I learned later had no eye contact with DP or my friend who were there at the time. He then said I needed to be admitted........and asked if I'd agree, which I did. I then spent 3 months on the "older people's ward" as I was 66 at the time with nurses and nursing assistants who were mostly very bored with people who were mentally ill and rarely talked to the patients or offered any comfort at all. The staff nurses busied themselves in the office and with meds and the nursing assistants sat amongst the patients but talked "around" us or over our heads. I was twice told by one NA to "pull myself together" and another one told me to "cheer up" - one or two were ok but in the main they were totally uncaring. BUT the conslt psych was a nightmare - the weekly reviews were a Q and A session between him and me........the rest of them (nurse from the ward, OT, CPN and GP on placement etc) all sat around and didn't dare speak. Everyone was afraid of him, and I felt very intimidated by him. When he was on holiday and another psychiatrist chaired the review the tenor was wholly different, with everyone feeling free to talk openly.
I was discharged after 3 months though not completely recovered but the bright spot was I had a lovely CPN for a year, and when she left the area she passed me on to her colleague who was even more lovely and has been hugely supportive to this day.
Sorry folks - I don't know what brought that on - just ignore me! I've even heard posters advising others to "go into hospital" for a while for a "break" like it's like booking yourself into a Travel Lodge. I know that MH services nationally are really stretched because of budget cuts and patients needing IP care (and I use the term loosely) are having to be transported miles away from their home area - just what you need when you're an IP! This damn government keep yabbering on about MH services having parity with physical health while at the same time slashing the MH budgets. And it's not gonna get better any time soon. There's someone on another thread who is bipolar and needs to be an IP because of SH risk and there are no beds.
I certainly don't think your posts should be deleted Fluffy sad as it is to know that you are suffering so much. I think the difference is that people know you're in hospital and so are being kept safe (if nothing else) even though I know you've said before you don't want to be safe. Hope things get better for you.........life has dealt you a shit card for sure.