Autumn days in the village with lots of support for all kinds of MH problems - depression, anxiety, OCD, psychosis etc

[fluffydressinggown]

Shiny new thread. xx

Oh no - it sounds like so many of us are struggling today, me included. It's been a nice warm sunny day here and I've sat in the garden this afternoon which was nice but not so good when you feel flat and empty. SO thinking of everyone and glad for those who are having a better day.

Keema I'm still wondering about you?

Painkillers aren't even touching the sides this time

(((( NN ))))

Have they got a plan, victrix?

Hi violet :) welcome!

Spidey surely they can't fine you the £60 for nursery?!

Feeling rubbish this evening as I'm getting a sore throat/ear. Time for damage control.

DS enjoyed his party (his birthday was a month ago - end of August - by the way! We are just really disorganised... from now on we will do his parties at the end of the summer term instead). I am socially exhausted from it though. TBH I'd thought parents might not stay but as they did I was making a bit of small talk (in between watching the DCs climb of course) which I find incredibly hard.

I hope the soreness goes away quickly, fuzzpig. Glad DS enjoyed his party

Snowy I think their plan is keep chucking painkillers at me until they work

The only upside is they might be able to do my op this week if there is a space available

I hope they get a space, victrix It sounds like you need it

I typed a long post but net glitches and its gone. Panic attack is now it's slow one that makes me feel woozy and detached and awful its been building gradually for a couple of hours it's just ramped up it could be like this for hours yet before it starts I hate it I know its a panic attack the counciller said it was when I desc it but I think im going to die.
There's nothing that'll stop it when it's like this, everything that helps the quick ones does nothing fit the slow onese

((Spidey)) panic attacks are horrible, look after yourself x

I don't see myself going home any time soon, surely it's better for them just to whip out my gallbladder while I'm in here anyway??

ive been an idiot.
i emiailed our chief inspector saying i would pay for therapy for one of our problem people.

i know its going to cause me grief.

i need a hole to hide in. ive fucked up here and in real life. fuck fuck fuck.
i darent look at my emails.
im an absolute idiot idiot.

i really want to just retreat from life. i cant cope.

Something have you just sent it? If you use outlook you can recall unread messages x

no.
its on our own systems. it gone and there is nothing i can do.

i know she would benefit from what im suggesting. i just know im going to get into trouble.

ive said nothing to anyone else and gone directly to the CI. but he is going to htink im tapped.

i feel so convinced that i would put my money where my mouth is....i just know its going to land me in the shit.

Maybe they will just think you were being thoughtful?

I didn't finally calm down until about 1am. Luckily I slep and when I woke up i was feeling much better.
I'm not sure what it was, maybe a very long strange panic attack or something else? I'm seeing the Dr later so it'll be ok. I'm dressed ready for my first run, gotta take Ds to school at 12 and build up the courage to just go and do it.

vicar you have not fucked up on here. And I doubt you have irredeemably fucked up at work. As you realise, you have to cultivate professional detachment - you can't pay for therapy for all the sad souls you come across. I know what it's like, as I used to work for the CAB - but I had a very good manager with whom workers and volunteers could consult with for support if we became too engaged.

Open your emails - the reality can surely not be worse than wondering?

Thanks for the welcome fuzzpig, victrix, spidey and snowymouse! :)
Best wishes to everyone on here. :)

I have been feeling a bit better - yesterday I met up with my friend, and earlier spoke to my son's ex, who I hadn't spoken to for a few weeks. Hopefully I'll go and see her and my grandchildren in Nov.

Some books have arrived today about Al-Anon.

I think the Quetiapine is definitely calming me down. I've had a crazy few months of low mood and agitation brought on by stress. Aargh! But I think the Q may be bringing on the hot flushes that I thought I had seen the last of..hmm.

Shitting myself about seeing the doctor this afternoon.

(((( fluffy )))) Just be as open and honest with them as you can.

I'm glad the quetiapine is helping, violets

Oh (((( vicar )))) Do you get supervision for your difficult cases? Why do you think you've fucked up on here, I don't see it?

Good luck with the dr, spidey

Off to see occ health. Good luck to everyone else seeing doctors today.

Good luck mp

Thanks snowy, it's definitely making me calmer and I'm so relieved about that, though I feel a bit 'out of it'. I also take 2 x Zopiclone at night and I'd really like to get that down a bit.

Hope your day's going ok!

fluffy I've been following your threads, hope it's a helpful meeting with the dr this afternoon.

Good luck too at dr's spidey.

When I took quetiapine it helped me sleep as well.

I'm soso, still feeling knocked by last week.

Thinking of everyone with medical appointments today.

Occ health are happy for me to commence a phased return next week if I get the all clear from my higher authority. It'll be great to be back and apologies for my absence if any of you are my patients

That's excellent news, mp

Just seen Jr Dr staying on constants for now.

Really upset.

((( fluffy ))) Did they say how long for, or is it open ended?

Have you made any progress with the meds?