Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mental health

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Original poster

Driving away

999 replies

Pumble · 28/12/2012 00:52

I don't know where to post this and don't know what to do. I'm sitting here crying again with my 5 week old dd2 and just know that the best thing I could do for both of my girls is to get in the car and drive. If dd2 ever goes to sleep that is what I must do. I won't be leaving them alone and it will break my heart but it's what will be best for them. They deserve so much better than the useless failure of a mother they have.

I don't know why I'm posting this. I guess to feel less alone

OP posts:
LittleBearPad · 10/01/2013 00:42

And to be honest, the best days are those spent in your PJs. Xx

Sunnywithshowers · 10/01/2013 08:58

Hi Pumble I hope you have a good day today :)

Greenkit · 10/01/2013 09:58

Hope you have a good day today Pumble xx

DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 10/01/2013 10:26

Popping head round door to say hi. Hope day's got off to reasonable start.

quietbatperson · 10/01/2013 12:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Pumble · 10/01/2013 21:11

Well, there have been ups and downs over the past 24 hours but I guess that that is to be expected and I am trying to focus on the fact that there have been ups which is more than there have been.

We all survived our trip to the doctors this morning, despite having to wait an hour to be seen. DD1 was an absolute star as there is not a lot to do in a waiting room when you're 21 months!! The doctor was good and I am seeing her again in 10 days to check how things are etc.

DD2 is definitely calmer still although evenings are definitely her grizzly time - not wanting to feed, just be grumpy - I remember these days so vividly with dd1 and know they don't last forever but when she's screaming away it's hard to remember that and not feel it's because of something I have done if that makes sense.

DH is back at work tomorrow which is worrying me a little as it will be just me and the pumbletts. He has been absolutely amazing this week - I'm not really sure how he is still awake and functioning as he has had so little sleep and done so much for us all. I do have a busy day with a trip to a BF counsellor in the morning to try to sort that out once and for all, and then I am supposed to be meeting friends in the afternoon. I don't really feel like seeing people but I know that it is good for the pumbletts, especially DD1 as they are her friends so to speak. I think tomorrow is definitely going to be a day where I need to take it one minute at a time....

Thank you for still being here for me to waffle on - its good to have somewhere to be.

OP posts:
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 10/01/2013 21:32

Can you play it by ear, see how the morning goes and then you don't feel compelled to stick to plans after lunchtime? Then if you're up to it, great, if not, never mind another day instead. At her age DD1 won't know she's missing anything. Nice for you to conk out with friends when you're in the mood.

(Remembers it took years for older DC to clock that "We'll see" meant not a cat in hell's chance).

Glad you have good rapport with GP.

Sunnywithshowers · 10/01/2013 21:46

Pumble it sounds like you're doing great. Big hugs :) xxx

TiddlyOmPomPom · 10/01/2013 22:44

I'm glad you're finding the doctor helpful, even if their waiting times aren't so great!

You're doing really well, xx

magimedi88 · 10/01/2013 22:47

Pumble - it's many a year since I was BF DS - but evening was his grizzly time until someone suggested to me to eat a decent amount of calories at tea time. It really helped. I had a cheese sarnie + some fruit at 4pm every day & the early evening grizzles really diminished.

Your DH sounds like a real star - can quite see why you are worrying about him back to work tomorrow but it's (I assume) only one day & then you have the week end.

You do sound so much better!!

(((((( x)))))

geekette · 11/01/2013 09:06

well hello there pumble. you sound quite positive. wonderful to hear!
waffle away and good luck with today!

ImNotCute · 11/01/2013 10:32

I found my first few days with both dcs to look after and dh back at work quite challenging. I think there was a mention earlier in the thread about just taking it an hour at a time, that definitely helps.

It's good you're getting out and about too, that also helps. But don't be afraid to pull out of stuff if it gets too much, people will understand.

You sound like you're doing really well and with a healthy attitude to what it will be like ie ups and downs, make the most of the ups. When there are downs just remember dh will be home again soon!

spiderlight · 11/01/2013 11:56

Just popping in to see how you're doing, and to ask - when you need to call your DH, do you shout 'Mr Pumble! Mr PUM-ble'?

Original poster
Pumble · 11/01/2013 13:09

I might start calling him like that!!! Smile

Well we have made it to lunchtime and are all ok. Stressful moments on the way to get to this point but out having lunch with the pumbletts and we're all still alive!! Absolutely shattered though. Hope they will both doze off in the car so I can sit in a car park and sleep too-wishful thinking?!

OP posts:
magimedi88 · 11/01/2013 13:22

Well done to have got half way through the day!

And it's Friday - I hope Mr P has got the w/e off.

Out of curiosity - where did the name Pumble come from?? Don't answer if it's too personal.

And I hope you've got the sunshine we've got here today - makes things a lot better.

Original poster
Pumble · 11/01/2013 13:51

I might start calling him like that!!! Smile

Well we have made it to lunchtime and are all ok. Stressful moments on the way to get to this point but out having lunch with the pumbletts and we're all still alive!! Absolutely shattered though. Hope they will both doze off in the car so I can sit in a car park and sleep too-wishful thinking?!

OP posts:
ImNotCute · 11/01/2013 14:07

Well done, I absolutely love it when both mine fall asleep in the car on the way home. I sit on the drive for a while and thoroughly enjoy the peace. Then if I'm unlucky they both wake up in a foul mood and I carry them wailing into the house! Fingers crossed yours don't do that today.

What time does your dh usually get home? You're on the home straight now....

quietbatperson · 11/01/2013 14:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sunnywithshowers · 11/01/2013 15:03

Well done lovely, you are doing brilliantly :) you sound so much brighter than you did at the beginning of this week. xx

DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 11/01/2013 18:59

hi Pumble glad you got through morning okay, hope DH not home too late from work, have a good weekend.

TiddlyOmPomPom · 12/01/2013 14:37

Hope your weekend is going well so far Pumble! If it isn't, come and talk to us about it.
Try to take your ADs at the same time every day if you can. Xx

Original poster
Pumble · 12/01/2013 18:07

Hi all. I'm doing ok. The pumbletts and I got to the end of the day yesterday and all survived. I did see the friends in the end which I struggled with a little but I know dd1 absolutely loved and it was worth it in many ways just to see how happy she was. Annoyingly the pumbletts fell asleep in the car but dd2 woke up every time the car stopped, even if I didn't turn the engine off and so no nap for me!

I got another decent (well as decent as you get with a 7 week old!) sleep and dh let me lie in again which is really helping I think. DD2 seems so much calmer now I'm off the nipple shields too which again makes it so much easier to think straight. It's so good to have dh home for the weekend though and I am putting the fact he is back to work on Monday to the back of my mind at the moment! I am taking the ADs at the same time (but that's because I keep forgetting and only remembering when I am in bed!).

I was feeling really proud of myself for not snapping at my husband for a few days but then did as he forgot to press start on the washing machine before we went out...!

I hope you are all having a good weekend.

OP posts:
ImNotCute · 12/01/2013 19:50

Good to hear you're doing well still. My dh got snapped at lots after I became a mother of 2 so once in the last few days is very restrained! Grin

I hope the rest of the weekend goes well. Just keep going and the difficult bit will soon be over. We're celebrating ds's 1st birthday this weekend. This year has gone so fast, even though at the time some days seemed painfully long.

Coconutty · 12/01/2013 19:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

magimedi88 · 12/01/2013 20:16

You sound so much better!

Little steps - an hour at a time.

Spring is coming, days getting longer very soon, it's the good end of winter now.

((( x )))