Emetophobia - my worst nightmare

[zonedout]

Ds1 goes to a school set on several different sites. Today one of the sites has been closed for deep cleaning due to norovirus wiping out hundreds of children this week. There are loads of siblings in ds1's building/class and 8 of his classmates were off today.

I am a single parent (really outing myself here!) and terrified of what feels completely inevitable right now. I was awake all night last night, waiting. Shall be doing the same again tonight.

You know, I feel like I have improved a lot with my emetophobia recently. I am no longer worried about the odd v. It's the awful, debilitating violence of noro that terrifies the life out of me.

The waiting is utter torture

I can hardly stand to go on the _Chat forum at the moment cos there is so many threads on the bug. I've had this bug already but I am still freaked out. My ds had a bit of diarrhoea last night and I was shaking, thinking that the bug was back. My nerves are shot! I read somewhere that this is the worst spread of the bug in 10 years :(

inneedof hope your ds has improved and you escape it

It does seem to get worse each year doesn't it?

Luckily so far there have not been many cases of it here, on of my fb friends posted about it a couple of weeks ago, all 3 of her kids had it at once and i freaked out as her kids got to my dd's school, luckily she kept them off school for quite a while so there was no major outbreak at school. I am hoping we can get through the rest of term without a outbreak but i dont think that will happen (people seem to get more sociable at christmas time so are more likely to pick these thigs up). I feel realy mean as i dont do any christmas activities with the dd's as i dont want to take them anywhere where they might pick something up.
Next week i am helping with the christmas fair at school so whats the betting there will be a outbreak next week and i will have to sit in a classroom for 4 hours makeing cakes with children whilst feeling very anxious?

santa i remember when dd1 was around 7monthe her spectacularly projectile vomiting pink porridge,raspberry puree in it> across from one side of the kitchen to the other

That sounds horrible marne. Yes clowns would be so much better to be scared of!

ds has had a piece of dried toast about half 11 and an apple at half 12. He is still complaining he's hungry and is bouncing off the walls now. I really really hope it wasn't a bug and dd won't come down with it.

marne i went to dd2 first xmas playshe had d and v 48hour later,i had just bum end but felt dreadful
i swore never do that again,and i havent

i feel like a wicked mum for not doing plays and assemblies but i physically just cannot enter a room packed full kids all close together in a smallish space

sometimes dp can go,the rest of the time i go over board with guilthomemeade cakes

innned that sounds very promising

i had a lot horible dreams this weekall vomit related

last night i dreamt there was a gadget you could put against the kids heads that could tell you when they been sick if it a bug/food poisoning or just random incident

if only!!!!!

That gadget sounds perfect

Most of dd's school had the bug last year around this time, luckily both of my dd's didn't get it (but i have to admit i kept them at home a few days). Our school is quite good and will send text messages out to warn parents to keep their kids home for at least 48 hours after d&v if there is a bug about and they will refuse to have kids back early but didn't stop the spread of it last year.

Dd1 and i caught it a few years back after a cake sale at the school, one of the parents thought it was ok to make cake whilst she had kids with d&v, we were both very poorly (i thought i had food poisoning until dd1 came down with it a few hours later) and it was the day before her 5th birthday party so we had to cancel.

I will be doing all i can to avoid it this year including giving them pro-biotics and reminding them to wash their hands, i make them remove there uniform as soon as the come in and bath them most nights. Still, i think if they are going to get it they will, however hard i have tried .

I hope so zoo have to take him to pick dd up and he will have to walk the 15mins and back. If he's fine after that I'll let him have a banana and rice for dinner.
I would love a device that ould pinpoint why they were sick. I wouldn't feel half as bad if I knew it was nothing I could catch.

inneed bouncing off the walls sounds promising, I hope it was nothing catching

Well, one hour till my GP appointment re: seeing her about this phobia. It's not my usual GP as she's away but it's another quite nice one. I'm taking Dh with me for moral support. I just am desperate for some help with this as I'm not coping at all. I'm also nervous about telling her about it, I'm not very good at talking about it and tend to forget everything and how bad it is . Usually I shy away from any anti anxiety medication as I'm scared it will make me nauseous or sick, but I feel so stressed and on edge all the time that I'm even willing and happy to take something for it.

In other news, DM looked after DD today and took her to the supermarket whilst I was at work - I know it's only little but I've banned us from going to the supermarket for fear of bugs (haven't told DM this so she didn't know she was doing anything bad). Now I've got another countdown for DD over the week end on top of my one from going to work this morning full of germy teenagers and a tummy bug doing the rounds

Anti-anxiety drugs have never made me feel sick, though i do have domperidone (sp) on hand just in case (you could ask for these?).

I always see the female gp and she's very understanding and happy to give me medication if i need it, i'm trying to get through the winter with out medication but i expect i will not make it .

I think i will put dd1 straight in the bath when she gets in from her school trip (i dont like the idea of her stuck on a bus for 6 hours with lots of germy children and she will probably be cold and wet).

So glad its friday so we can stay in for 2 days away from all the bugs (i hope).

Thanks Marne I'm shaky legged nervous not just from what the GP will say and do but also from catching something from going to the GPs

My order of this hand/surface spray and wipes arrived today - they are great. Used in the NHS for cleaning hands and surfaces and kill tummy bugs too. I shall keep one in my handbag and the other at home for emergencies to clean the house with if anyone gets the dreaded.

I hate going to the doctors too , i try and sit out of the way of everyone, dont touch the magazines and wash my hands as soon as i come out.

Dd2 has a hospital appointment next week to have her eyes tested, i'm dreading going, last year they had a sign up in the car park warning people about a d&v outbreak, i almost got in the car and drove off but i managed to go in and we came out bug free. Its hard with dd2 having Autism as she still puts everything in her mouth and always has her hands in her mouth, hopfuly her amune system is quite good from all the dirt she has consumed over the years.

Marne it's hard with my DD too but for different reasons as she is 20MO and seems to be attracted to everything hideously dirty when out and then sticking her fingers in her mouth .

I'll try and go in the GPs surgery a couple of mins before the apt and wait in the car otherwise in the hopes I don't have to wait long (they always run late though!). Our waiting room is more a thin corridor with a line of seats and everyone is quite close together and you can't escape ill people . There is a separate waiting room which is quiet but it means you can't hear your name being called and might miss your appointment (badly designed system!). Just madly crossing fingers she isn't running v late, don't think I can cope. I've already showered twice today including complete change of clothes and washed my hair twice, I shall do the same when I come back to from the GP and try to force DH to do the same . The washing pile is going to be very high!

Dh always moans about the amount of washing we do, the dd's have clean uniform every day and i make them change when they get in from school and after we go out.

I hope all goes well at the gp's and you dont have to wait to long to go in xxx

I am so sorry to hear how so many of you are really struggling with this.
I thought I was bad but I realise that actually, my phobia is not as bad as it could be.
:(
And I never thought I would say that!
I am quite strict re hand washing. If dc are ill then they go in the bath/ shower as soon as they feel able.
I am pretty meticulous in the kitchen too.
But they wear school uniform trousers and sweater for 2/3 days. New polo shirt every day and undies.
I wash bath towels after every use, and hand towels 3-4 times per week - which dh thinks is excessive :)
I hope it goes ok at the gp reastie x

Well, I don't think GP had ever heard of emetophobia. She sort of implied that I have to put my anxiety onto something to give it focus and me control and this is what I've chosen . She was very nice and non judgy though. She's prescribed me citalopram and is going to research a national NHS specialist centre for emetophobia near me in the hopes I might be able to go there (I took info for her). I have to go back next week when she's had time to see what options there are for me treatment wise and to see how I am. I don't think I'm going to get any proper help for months though and can't stand the thought of another awful winter, especially how bad the bugs are at the minute. I feel proud of myself for going to the GP and admitting how I feel and asking for help though. Oh, and she was running 45 mins late and had to wait all that time in the waiting room

It's funny re: behaviours as some things I do are really OTT than I think some people here but other things I'm more laid back about. Like I only change towels once a week (unless someone is ill or we have guests using the towels).

Sounds like progress reastie.
Well done.
I for one am proud of you x

Well done for going and talking about it.

I dont do the 'changing towels daily' thing, my house isn't clean and tidy (as i think it can be too clean).

marne i know someone with an autistic sonhe eats everything including grit in the play area at the park and sucking his hand when he has been playing in muddy puddles or ponds
ive never known him be sick in the 3 years ive known him

reastie well done lovely.at least the gp is looking for help for you
i took citalopram

in need as you havent posted for a bit assuming alls well at the moment-fingers,eyes and legs x it stays that way!

dds have had 2 major arguements today-a sure sight things ,forthem,are returning to normal
ds is powering up more slowly.ive spoken to gp and he is being referred to peadiatrician regarding his immune response,possibly with test

ive completely lost it this week,my MH is in shreds-place is a tip,depressions raging and ocd element of emet has made touching anything very hard

i got some rubbr gloves today and shall have to start pulling it back tomorrow

regarding uniform i spray it everyday with dettol anti bac as soon as dcs step out of it ,they go straight into pjs this time of yearuniforms are washed at 60oc and if im really stressed and have heard x amount people in the class are off it gets napisan added

Thanks for the support

I feel slightly like badvoc as in I thought I was bad but some of you have it much worse then me . We so need to switch phobias to clowns

ds is fine I think. Had a bowl of rice for dinner and an apple half hour after. He was still hungry so I sent him to bed and I'll let him eat normally tomorrow. Really don't think it was a bug now.

With uniform it gets washed when it's dirty most times jumpers last a wekk with a good sponging some nights. They do get changed every day after school and I wash on a 40.

Can I recommend 'halo' washing liquid for washing machines for everyone. It kills germs including noro and is non bio and super gentle (I have v sensitive skin and it's fine with me). It works out cheaper for us to use that than adding napisan or milton in every washing load and cleans well. I get mine from tesco. Don't let the packaging (which makes it look like it's a really cheapy product) put you off.

Erm...I am actually terrified of clowns too :(
(And frogs)

Will check that out reastie thanks

Oh i'm checking that out thanks reastie,

badvoc you just need spiders for a full house lol

Ha! Yes. Don't mind spiders, or needles or heights or any of what I class as normal fears :(