Cybergarden: Spring into Summer

[Upwardandonward]

Here's a new thread for us.

Afternoon all - really , really sorry but am zonked by (nearly cured ) infection . A s to Afternoon Delight's name , phew , that film and song look romanticw - I thought it was something along those wicked lines , Showtime ,but was too shy to google it!
What a lovely image of you and Dh on boat in the sunshine , gossiping ( not the right word , as ever with me) .

Thank you for much better explanation of cybergarden , which is indeed a place for us to rest at any time of day or night , & invaluably cheering .

What a shock to develop disability at this time in your life ( always a shockof course) , with new child... so glad your DP is supportive with your depression , but really feel for you that he can't personally relate to the experience . I had a relationship years ago with someone who felt they hadn't ever had real depression (they had , but used unhealthy ways to try to bury it ) - it's a cliche, but with conditions & disabilities I have always found it's communicating the obstactles to others that seems hardest .
I hope you are both getting support ... is your health condiion covered by a local support group ? Would hope you could access some counselling to help with the grieving process & adjutments . I know support groups can be difficult to get to in any circumstances . I found it an be a stressful business dealing with reactions of extended family & friends .

Really relate to the childhood depression... was there anyone who understood at all ? Glad to meet you & would be good to share experiences . Right , sorry for al the questions - this place is also one of fun and sanctuary , & there will be plenty more time for talking .

Hope we're all OK with the heat today , & that none of us has put the Pooh Bear film on , which has made me sob hopelessly . Hope you've been enjoying your painting , Showtime You know I know nothing about printing, and Dh says he's not much more knowledgable... Thank you for the site - I've searched for sites to explain pc stuff, but haven't yet found everything I need

s and cloudy lemonade plus midge deterrent

I'd never connected you with a childhood depression, futuredream, and hope it might be helpful to know someone with this experience. Mind you, I'd not connected you with Pooh Bear either, and imagine you must be really down with some infection/virus if you felt weepy - can't remember anything unhappy in the book and not seen the film. Have probably seen more films on TV than cinema, as just not been interested in being indoors, back in the day when I had a choice.

Finished painting (two boxes to replace one which is daily drug-store and was getting crowded), and sorted some fabric for new craft I plan to start soon for Christmas presents (three cheers for internet!)

DP has now added his wisdom to that of Future's DH re your pic, Showtime.

He says you can investigate the resolution of the pic on Facebook by right-clicking and choosing "View image". This will give you a page with just the image, as large as your browser can make it. If that's tiny, or poor quality, that's what you're gonna get. But if you're happy with it, go to Save or Save As in your usual way and the image will be saved onto your desktop or wherever.

Good luck.

Oh Nilgiri, please thank your DP for picture advice. I did manage to enlarge the item to full-screen, (don't ask me how), but didn't know how to do the rest of it, or get it to someone else, but now I have a chance. It's actually a cartoon and might amuse cybergardeners, so will see about adding it to my profile page (tiny amount of technical ability acquired only recently). Pats on back to you for managing to post at all with different PC.

Even more thanks for description of honeysuckle in cybergarden, lovely memory and my present honeysuckle
won't be flowering un til Autumn. Been told that blackb irds are always latest chirrupers, but have never heard "mine" in RL.

Hope both AfternoonDelight and upward have had a better-than-usual day, and can look forward with confidence to the new week.

I guess I'm just finding things a bit more stressful as everything is happening at once for me. DS has possible Asperger's (I won't mention him again but it's a major factor in my current mental health), which they're taking their time about diagnosing. We're moving 150 miles away next month to be closer to MIL. I've started an OU degree to better myself while I'm ill. We're getting married in September. The depression has been kept at bay, but for the past few months I've been feeling it get the better of me and noticed my own mood swings.

Like I said before, DP is wonderful about depression, knows when I have bouts of it and tries his best to be supportive and help. For instance, today I had to go to the tip - we're having a massive clear out while packing - and he gave me a hug and told me to take my time and not worry about going outside. He knows that when I get bad all I want to do is hide away from the world. He's such a positive person though, it's one of the things that attracted me to him. It would be nice to speak to someone who knows what that gut-wrenching black cloud feels like.

At the minute with my back there's nothing that can be done apparently. I'm hoping that moving to a new county with a different local NHS system may help. At the moment they want me to go to a pain management clinic and look at the ways that I can manage my pain to get back to a "normal" life. I've seen so many different people in the last 7 months and all I can understand is that it may get better, some time, they're not sure when, and that my back will always be weak. Lovely.

futuredream I didn't actually realise until recently that I'd been depressed for as long as I have been. I recently got a copy of my medical records in order to apply for something, and a few of the earlier entries caught my eye. I then started to remember my mam giving me "happy medicine" and going to see a child psychologist called Maria. We used to make and do all sorts of things, and we'd chat while we were doing it. We even made a cake once!

Thank you for the wonderful welcome Nilgiri and Showtime

Ahhh, thank you for !

Children very welcome! Future just meant the most regular posters don't happen to have any - oddly for a place like MN.

Thanks for the AfternoonDelight, and I think futuredreammanaged a much better welcome than I did !
One of the reasons I have anti-depressants is back pain, despite years attending Pain Clinics, and it is more than likely they will be able to help you in some way, although waiting time can be six months. I moved to a different health area too, and really hope this helps you.

Sorry to hear that DS has possible Aspergers - I understand this can be difficult to diagnose, particularly at an early age, and you are no doubt still coming to terms with what this might mean in the future. It's good that you have help from your DP, and getting married is something you can really look forward to.

Am off for another early night; been too hot for about five hours and house temp is just over 20C - tiring.

Thhank you , Nilgiri - children very welcome !
at grown-out of sock and the illoicit payments Showtime has realised are required for best printing results

< cybergarden medal to Nilgiri for posting from hellphone >
Your craft projects sound excellent , Showtime (any piccies? ) and sorry for worrying you about my mood- doing OK , and agree about preferring outdoors -but the Pooh books have some very lovely poignant bits !

Ah , sympathy on back - my Dh has had pretty severe problems & it has been very scary , but would be really hopeful for the pain management clinic helping you (should hope so too ).Your DP sounds lovely , and congratulations on forthcoming marriage .S

What an enormous amount of positive change you have lined up thix year , but sorry you have the uncertainty re : your son's difficulties .Sorry if sounded negative earlier , bit feverish

Ah , excellent you received a bit of therapy as a chil - my Dm was shocked when I was prescribed valium at 8 How nice of you to say that about not associating me with such a past , Showtime ... am a totally different person last 8 years or so good job too as have received no mh services, and no one who knew me before can believe the change

Vast numbers of bees enjoying May flowers-several breeds

Aw, thank you all for being so lovely :)

It may sound strange but I'm really not bothered about DS having Asperger's - or at least, not bothered about the label. He didn't develop as he should growing up, he's only 4, but he is more like a 2 year old in the way he speaks and acts. Throughout all of the assessments we've gone through so far, everyone has warned me that it may 'sound bad' what's written about him. My philosophy is that nothing they write will be a surprise given that we live with his behaviour every day, and that the worse he sounds, the more help he gets. DP's brother has Asperger's and I saw the transformation in him once he started going to a school that catered to his needs. I am determined that DS will get that from the start.

Sorry to hear about your back problems Showtime - they really are a bugger aren't they? I didn't have a clue that my back was responsible for most movement in my body until it broke. I have asked DP for a new back for Christmas though

futuredream It turned out that I went through most of the services that the NHS has for children's mental health. They have quite a few - or at least, enough to keep you going round in circles for months trying to find someone "appropriate for your needs"

Right, must go to bed, I need sleep before I finish off my essay tomorrow. Goodnight all xx

Sleep well all.

Morning all, another sunny day here, but still not had uncomfortably warm weather. Woken in the night by a familiar rustling plus cold nose - beagle needed to be a bit warmer, and we know how much they enjoy other people's beds...
I'm sure the Pain Clinic will be able to help, AfternoonDelight, even if no cure possible, they can make life much better plus one can have access to latest non-NICE drugs as trial, so don't give up.
This seems to be a difficult time in your life, and am sure it will get easier as you get the right help for DS, but it does take time (and I know this from postings on MN ).
Best wishes for tomorrow's essay - excellent idea to get degree; what is the chosen subject? (No hurry here, as have a busy day and not feeling A1.)
Hope futuredream is feeling recovered from last week, and that everyone can find enough spoons.

By-the-way, today's temperature in the kitchen is 70 degrees old money, just right, with warmer places in sunny garden but not at all uncomfortable. Have to go to town (chasing messed-up prescription) and hope I can find a parking space not too far to walk).
Tray of s and cool drinks available for visitors to cybergarden, and would draw attention to early-blooming marigolds and California Poppies, self-sown from last year.

Evening all, and thank you for, Showtime , and for telling us
more , Afternoon Delight*- really touching to hear your Dh's brother flourished at right school , & hope for same for your ds .. This is a
lovely place to come when darker times hit

Sorry realised what I sounded like yesterday rambling about partners and depression - that'll teach me to post when feeliing odd

So sorry you're not feeling A1, Showtime, and hope your prescription
was sorted out . So sorry back pain is such a part of the package , Showtime, and hope pain clinic supportive and innovative .

PC totally frozen earlier when tried to post , so sorry ,and had to go to scary appt - went very badly in a scary way and I don't know how I'm going to get the confidence back to face all the medical appts coming up ... I'm sure we all know the feeling ! It always seems to happen when you're already at a low ebb . Am very shocked and puzzled as to what to do next , but MS Society & Patient's Association helplines so helpful .

Sorry , rushing but wil return

Oh Future, so sorry today's appointment went badly. After all your excellent work over many months building your confidence. Was this bad news, or the general Dealing With HCPs problem? (Don't answer if that's too intrusive.)

Mm, thank you all for cool drinks! Much appreciated, as definitely hotter here than Showtime's place. But fortunately not too hot, and glad to hear you haven't been overheating even with beagle blanket.

Hope Upward and Afternoon have also been enjoying the heat without completely melting.

at California poppies, which are stunning but became slug fodder last time I tried. Slugs of Doom have even had a nibble at the mint, but I've dealt with those ones. Bwahahaha!

Evening all, even though it's such a nice warm evening, I still need a so I've made some for you all

Future sorry to hear about your scary appointment. I hope you're feeling ok, I know I've had a few scary appointments in my time - usually when a HCP is clearly having an off day or says something tactless that I then overanalyse. It was like that when I got back from an appointment with a physio who told me my back would "never be the same again".

Thanks for asking about the degree, Showtime . I really wanted to do something positive with my time off, and I was going stir crazy tied to the sofa, barely able to move, so it's a Business Studies with Accounting degree. It comes with an accountancy certificate built in, which could be done from home if my back doesn't get better. I've always liked the idea of doing it and being ill was the best kick up the ass I could have asked for.
Loving the poppies, I just can't wait until we move, I'll have my very own garden that I can fill with flowers!

Feeling a bit more upbeat now that essays have been sent in, although of course I'm now stressing that I haven't done well enough. Will be closing my eyes and counting down the days until I can lie in a lounger in my own garden, MNetting with a lovely in my hand :)

PS Nilgiri if you find a way to get rid of slugs, let me know. The ones here fly in the face of salt, and find slug pellets tasty grub! We increased our population the last time we tried them!

So sorry to hear about today's appointment, futuredream, and I well know the shaky feeling that follows a disappointing interview which does indeed hit one's confidence. At least you managed to get through it, and the following appointments probably won't be as difficult when you've had time to recover from today.

Thanks to everyone for various s and cool drinks. We've had a slight breeze off the sea, so very nice weather here, just own temperature gauge a bit off.

Shame about the California Poppies Nilgiri, slugs here seem to go for the Shirley variety, buds leaves and roots, and having lost the lot this year and last, I bought another one
[italics here] from local shop, now very precious. Even worse, a Cardoon (present from friend) has been repeatedly nibbled despite broken egg-shells, copper wire round edge of pot plus cut-up pan-scrubber scattered over surface - the b's become a conversation piece....

Thanks for telling us about degree course, Afternoon, which does seem a very versatile and practical qualification, particularly if you prefer to work
from home. Having a new garden will be fun too (particularly if DP's happy to help with heavy stuff),
and I'm sure we'll be able to help with seeds/plantlets when the time is right.
Need to walk round a bit, but will be back before bedtime, and hope we're all having a relaxing evening.

Internet being delivered byte-by-byte by carrier pigeon this evening, so apologies if I disappear abruptly.

Afternoon, you are a woman after my own heart with your tea habit. Lying in a lounger in your own flower-filled garden sounds fabulous! When the house-move reaches the Arrrghh stage, that'll be a great thought to hold onto.

Showtime, sorry you're having to move around for comfort. Hope you had success with pharmacist and are now - or soon to be - stocked up. I suppose time will tell if this one is more reliable. And how dare SoD nibble your magnificent cardoon! Is the one you acquired last year? (If flakey memory serves.)

Alas, Afternoon, the battle between Good and Evil against slugs about as successful at mine as chez vous-meme.

Sorry you're having internet problems Nilgiri - is your own gadget back yet? Must be difficult & frustrating.

I have all prescriptions now, thanks, also given copy so I can change pharmacy if required, and saw a new pharmacist today so am guessing previous one has left.
DB tells me all Alliance/Boots shops in his city have E.European staff, some with very poor English indeed, but I have choice of pharmacy owned by some GPs as alternative to the three chain shops.

Cardoon is second one (own memory v. flaky indeed).

Sorry have to give up and go, but hope everyone has a good night and not too hot

Own machine probably won't be back till weekend. Shouldn't complain, at least I have this secondary device.

Glad to hear positive news of pharmacies.

Wishing us all a cool night's sleep.

btw , am quite amazed at there having been much in the way of children's psychological support as was refused anything and schooling v disrupted ... was probably quite a bit later than my schooldays !
Very sorry you had such a severe time with back , and that you've been
needing to move around , Showtime So relieved prescription sorted out , & hope you weren't totally exhausted by errand as you weren't feeling great yesterday , I think

< lights cybergarden filigree lanterns for moths to enjoy>

< gleamiest of medals to Nilgiri for determination to post >
< helps fairies with the washing -up before catching up further with thread >

Hope you're feeling recovered from yesterday's meeting, futuredream, and wondering if possible to have company for next interview (have often wanted recording device).
Many thanks for all the housekeeping in cybergarden.
Bought filigree lanterns for DS's garden back when new on market, having enjoyed them so much and needing something packable, so glad we have them here.

anyone?

Sorry about the internet trouble Nilgiri - I hope you get everything sorted. I'm actually feeling a tad guilty because I've just taken delivery of a brand new laptop courtesy of DSA. I had a wonderful woman come round to the house just shortly after my studies started, she introduced me to all sorts of technology that can help me with my studies, but my current laptop couldn't hack the software. I have a program to type as I talk, another to read documents to me, a dictaphone, a scanner, and all my textbooks are coming in ringbound format. This will make it so much easier when I'm having a bad day, I can lay on my bed and just speak to type an essay or have the software read out the text for me.

futuredream yes, there was tons of support that I remember, but I may have gone round the departments a few times. I was pulled out of school to go to a group therapy session, at least I remember that much!

Trying to have a positive day today, the packing is pretty much done, I've bought a massive pot of magnolia paint to restore the flat to its original colour . DP will be doing most of the painting but he's promised to put a chair near to some doors so at least I can feel I've helped a little.

Wishes everyone a pleasant day, enjoy the breeze in the wonderful cybergarden :)

Thanks for the AfternoonDelight, something I often forget through having water-glass alongside, and it's good to hear about the practical help you got when beginning the course. Also glad to hear that your DP plans to do most of the painting (and probably plans to do some more purple painting in the new house), although I've always liked Magnolia paint. Remember complaining to best friend interior designer as we looked at gaudily-decorated possible house and her saying not to worry, a gallon of Magnolia and it would soon look like home.... Hope it goes well, and quickly..

Having viewed slug damage yesterday, I bought a huge container of pellets, reverting to non-green habit out of desperation (had even poured coffee-grounds around patio pots, so can't imagine how they reached cardoon.)

AAfternoon all ,with very guilty apologies for slowness . Thank you for
s , AfternoonDelight , and for already being are brilliant company in cybergarden
< joins in mourning loss of purple walls >

Thank you , Showtime , Dh will come to appts , but he's had so many years of helping me with hcps I worry about his blood pressure etc if he comes to many more The main thing is , he's always on my side , which is the most helpful thing I could wish for .

Very good to hear of these adaptations , AfternoonD- you are so determined to plough on through the worst days .

Dh set up speech-to-text-software for me when it was fairly new , but I had trouble with that & dictaphone as not got perfectly clear speech - I keep wanting to try again

I was about to grumble that my cognition is too iffy to try to dictate writing as I can't hold the sense of more than a sentence , when it occurred to me -1st time in 20 years -that I could try dictating notes in text , to try to use them -thank you!.

Incredibly hard when have to stay reclined , but Upward and Nillgiri have found amazing sites with different supports , which I'm sure you 've tried ... can't find links atm

Feeling better, thank you kind Showtime & wouldn't have wailed
about it had person not been outrageous .
.
Oh misery at all these Slugs of Doom . Not so many here this year , but we do have snail trees , as Dh calls the brocolli plants < wishes SoD away from gardeners' pots >

Glad you all liked the lanterns- like it that you have good memories of them , Showtime

Hope a bit cooler where you are, Nilgiri , & that your detrermination to have a positive day pays off , AfternoonDelight .
< HF brings California poppies & new vial of cheering , reviving elixir to Upward >
mores