snowmash's cybergarden

[ThisIsANiceCage]

We filled up your thread, snowmash! So here's another one.

Neither weather nor circumstance seems to be cooperating at the moment, so I thought we could do with a virtual garden to sit out in.

shodatin has started work already:
"we don't lose anything to the frost here, and nobody thieves our daffs and precious bay trees. Most days will be sunny I think, but sometimes we have rain at night, particularly when we've done some planting..."

And I think it needs a summer house with a chiminea or the like to sit round after dark and toast our tootsies.

Hope today goes better, showmash. I wish MN still had those lovely daffodils or shamrocks to make you a posy. We'll have to make do with a virtual spray of bright yellow forsythia, which has come out a treat this year and at last has some light to glory in here. It's like your own personal burst of sunshine!

Pixie, there are chairs set out by the Moorish fountain when you need a break from your labours.

Hello again Pixie, are you still dashing about and being madly busy? Hope your DD2 is still keeping well after her hospital stay and all the excitement of twins' birthdays; that must have been some weekend, so will look forward to seeing you having a rest by the Moorish fountain (that is a good idea by the way and something I can visualise now we have sun).
Kizzie, sorry it's a difficult time for you and hope you have enough RL support.
Hope snowmash can join us by the fountain sometime; we do wonder how you are doing every day, and I'm still at the ready to send you something nice.

Kizzie, I'm really sorry you're having a tough time. Thinking of you and everyone else.

I saw consultant today, still voluntary so that is good. Increasing all the meds. Talked about other stuff too.

I want to say that I do want to interact on the thread, just not good mentally or physically (another pt hurt me).

Brilliant that you're still voluntary, snowmash, & that you talked about other issues with consultant. Hope meds increase will help you with this progress. (Really glad & relieved voluntary).

I remember that you said earlier in the week when feeling v rough that you weren't avoiding questions or ignoring us ( please forgive paraphrasing ) & to me you seem mostly pretty interactive ( increasingly so , even?) - thank you for prompt update on this morning .

Am I understanding you correctly though - did another patient injure you in some way ? Really hope you're OK - can we help at all ? Dooes any staff member know? Apologies if misunderstanding

Hope you have a peaceful afternoon after such a morning

PS snowmash- it must be quite bad for you to mention it at all , & especially so if it's left you feeling rubbish mentally and physically . So sorry xx

Hello snowmash, it;s lovely to hear from you again, but am now wondering what happened with the other pt? I do hope you're feeling more relaxed now, while the meds are being increased, and also hope it was a productive talk with the consultant. As hob says, it must have been bad for you to mention it at all, and we are all concerned for you.

Yes staff know. Other pt grabbed round my head and shook - problem as my chair holds my body tight so no free movement

Oh dear God , snowmash - horrified - You won't necessarily feel up to saying more atm but the ward really should have safeguards for you , being in such a vulnerable position - did something go wrong with their impressive precautions or are there few to speak of ?

oh snowmash - Im so sorry that has happened to you. and for you. I hope the staff responded fully.

And hope the consultant went ok. Great that you felt able to talk. Do you know what meds you are on?

Thank you for all your good wishes and sunshine. Especially from snowmash - how lovely you are to think of me/us when you have so much yourself to worry about. Dont worry I wont start moaning on here - plenty of other places for me to do that.

btw - i meant to say this about a week ago - pixie i have twins too. 11 now tho, big [gorgeous] boys x

Oh good grief! Poor you! Are you very hurt?

Must have been terrifying, and still very scary afterwards.

(((hugs)))

((((((more hugs))))))

That's such an achievement that you're still voluntary, after what you've been through.

Oh snowmash, I'm so sorry to hear about the other patient, and of course I'm hoping there was no damage done, although it must have been upsetting. Do you feel this episode was a one-off, and that you'll be safe in the future? I do hope so. Once again, is there anything we can do to help? (Apart from the prayers of course)

Hope you got something good for tea, snowmash.

Mine looks like being fishcake - tho not Pixie's exploding one! About to survey the veggie box for what to have with it.

Nothing really done to manage future risk :(

Got opiates and NSAIDs from dr (lots of muscles in tight spasm)

Really want to walk out

I'm so sorry this has happened to you snowmash, and not surprised you want to leave but please, please stick it out until you're properly recovered, and continue being voluntary while you possibly can. Staff must have been shocked and upset that this happened, more than they'd say to you perhaps, and I'm sure they are determined you won't be hurt again.
They do seem to have made up for your previous lack of painkillers, so it's just possible you've now got the right dosage.
Hope you had a good meal, whether hot or cold. I always have the same thing these days, but very varied protein mid-day.

I wish I could kidnap you and take you to a real garden. With lots of jasmine and no violent people.

Honestly tho? If you were out and having to organise and then swallow enough daily food, and muster the oomph and self-belief to haul yourself to medical appointments, do you think you'd manage that day after day? Without fail? Before admission you sounded like you were deteriorating really fast, partly because of such practicalities, and that it was a downward spiral. We were , it was so noticeable.

(((hugs)))

TIANC's right snowmash, we were all so worried about you. Still worried of course, but we thought until yesterday, that you were now physically safe and recovering under supervision, plus getting the right meds at last.
I think I mentioned my brother's stay in a psychiatric hospital because of his depression; life has been rather difficult for him since he got out and he particularly mentioned having all meals served to him and people around to talk to day and night as the plus points of being in hospital.
We do feel for you, and hope you have the strength to manage a bit longer
until you're really well enough to leave.

snowmash, have you any source of advice or advocacy on this matter? If you could face asking for a meeting about your safety requirements the hospital will surely have to comply , but you ought to be able to hand this problem over to a representative , as you have so much to deal with. I think you need a professional to give them a warning.

Agree with shodatin that the staff are likely to be very shocked by this incident - but maybe you feel they have little say in the ward conditions .

You are absolutely amazing to have gone through these hard weeks & I pray this awful difficulty doesn't make you derail your recovery . The other ladies speak such good sense on this. I'm worried for you that if you leave before you're fully ready , you may "go backwards" & maybe need readmission for longer than if you stay now.

Please think about whether someone from a MH organisation can advise you, eg MIND can give you legal advice. ( I'm sure you know this) - or do you have a solicitor you could have a phone chat with?

Sorry to go on and on
Prayers are with you
(we do indeed wish we could kidnap you and bring you to sit watching the stars tonight)

( Or an organisation the Care Quality Commission- but can' t work out from their site whether they deal with hospitals - or an organisation / charity related to your disability, if you don't mind the suggestion ) . Sorry, you've had enough to think about today. You don't have to try to deal with this yourself , or to leave the ward yet - there are strategies they can implement- maybe they can be legally required to provide extra staff cover ... sorry if this is overkill

Have to go now, so will wish everyone a good night, with extra thoughts to snowmash and prayers to get through this difficult time. Night all.

What a day. Hope you somehow get a bit of shuteye despite it all, snowmash. Wishing you the strength to keep on.

Night all. Take good care of yourselves.

Night all you lovely people ( ahem ) . As TIANC says , wishing you the strength to keep going .

I know you may feel too tired and sore to make any " big " statement to the staff about this for now, but can you tell them you want to get independent advice about your safety & in the meantime you want to eat your meals away from the dining room & not join in group activities under the current conditions?
You said the ward was in crisis ages ago , for a couple of weeks at a time, I think? - I think they'd be on very shaky ground claiming you were refusing to comply with your treatment. You might be v worried about that, though . Who can enforce the correct procedures, I wonder...hope we can support you with this . Apologies again for all the interfering talk.

( Kind TIANC - I know nothing but inflict it relentlessly on others ( PS lots of anti cuts stuff going on here & many coaches / trains booked for Sat , plus a cyber march for those unable to get there ! shall I go to the other thread for this)
Peaceful night all ...& we must implement shodatin's comforting parcel ideas

Morning all. Hope you got some rest, snowmash.
Sunshine here