Upsetting to you does not equal hate speech. If you think there are comments that violate MN rules feel free to report them and let the moderators decide.
I have to say that there are posts on here which come very close to the Hate Act context of the overall Equalities Act.
No such thing as the Hate Act. If you're going to quote legislation at least get it right.
I understand that the OP not wanting to look after her disabled sibling/not feeling it is her responsibility, or responsibility to take on may be triggering to you as a disabled person who does need others to support and care for you.
I understand that to see others agreeing with the OP that she does not need to feel responsible for her sibling, or take on the care, would be triggering to you too, as you would not have wished for your own family to feel this way.
However, this is a public forum. Disagreement is to be expected. Disability doesn't mean you get to ban opinions that are personally triggering or upsetting to you.
A lot of us who have answered here are carers ourselves and our perspectives are equally valid. Nobody on here has said they hate disabled people or think they don't deserve care, compassion or support. The issue for OP's situation, as far as I see it, is not that her sister is disabled. None of us are suggesting that this is what makes the sister burdensome. The issue is that she is making herself a burden to her siblings by refusing to engage with care assessments, outside help, or any sort of future planning for when her parents can't take care of her any more.
I have been through this with my DGP. I can't describe how utterly helpless and stuck it makes me feel when she refuses everything, with the result that family have to turn our lives upside down to care for her, to the detriment of my own family, my job, any form of enjoyment I may have outside of my own work and home. Caring for someone isn't a default expectation, it's something that needs discussion, negotiation, mutual agreement and boundaries. None of that has happened in my situation and OP's sister isn't doing that either. It's not like her sister has had an accident, or something unforeseen has happened here. It's wilful engagement in manipulation, thinking that if no planning is done and all other help is refused, OP will have to pick up the care because poor sister, she's disabled and can't do anything for herself. Just because someone is disabled, elderly or ill, it does not give them the right to manipulate and emotionally blackmail others, or dictate their lives for them, or that they have an automatic right for their care to be provided in the exact way they want. Need? Yes. Want? No.
@llizzie - it doesn't sound like you have done any of these things, you sound very proactive, capable and determined to make your own choices about your care. Your example would be a great one for OP's sister of how things could be. But OP's sister isn't like you. She's been taught to be passive and has developed learned helplessness, thanks to OP's parents. It doesn't sound like she wants to become responsible for her own care and making her own choices. It sounds like OP would support her to do that and put it in place if she would engage. What OP is asking here is, given that her parents and sister won't engage, how can she disentangle herself and set clear boundaries. She's not asking how she could be of more help, as she's exhausted the options.
Most of us here who are or have been carers don't step back lightly - we only do it as a last resort, when we can no longer physically and/or mentally cope, or when we start to feel manipulated or coerced. It's not because we are awful, uncaring people and certainly not because we hate the disabled, old, or ill for being so.