A teacher smacked my child

[Xmumof3xo]

I really need some advice I’m in the uk
My son is 7 he has a diagnosis on dyspraxia, he’s going for a ADHD and autism assessment..
So today I picked him up from school, he was quite upset, he has said his class teacher has smacked him on his hand twice, quite hard and it has really upset him, he was messing with some building cubes and the teacher became angry at him and did a “cross face”.
I have rang the school, I am really angry about this.
The school office said “I don’t see that happening”, I made it very clear as to why he would lie my son is a big believer in god and he doesn’t like lying, the head teacher came on the phone and said she’s going launch a investigation.
After everything that has happened with this school, the constant shouting at him, making him stand in the corridor door and the constant belittling I have no faith in them.
I have done a EHCP as the school has refused it 4 times, I have already changed his school as he’s constantly being bullied, he came home with horrific injuries in his old school and now the teachers are bullying him. Please help me, I am close to homeschooling him but he has made it clear he loves going to his friends and loves his routine, who else can I go to, I’m so scared of making his life harder at school but this can’t go on anymore, I am fuming, I’ve had so many meetings about the behaviour of his teachers, they say he’s “too sensitive”. Everything calmed down until today, but this time she has physically hurt my child and I ain’t letting it slip, he is not going school tomorrow until I am happy about the outcome of this “investigation”

Yep. Parents should be backing up the teachers not bullying and undermining them

You're so defensive. There's no need to be. I'm simply expressing an opinion about what might happen. To help you think of all eventualities. I'm not sure how much credence a 7 year old girl will give to the investigation. Depends how her recall is viewed by the school

I am an sen teacher and a few weeks ago a little girl concocted a whole story about me hitting her, thankfully her mother knew she was at it. I was actually so hurt by the allegation as I am so kind and loving to my children. Children do lie, it’s not the first time I’ve known a child claim an adult hurt them. This isn’t to say your son is lying but let the investigation play out. The fact you don’t trust the school isn’t ideal because I doubt you will believe them if they say it didn’t happen.

Wrong. It happens, unfortunately. And you absolutely cannot know it didn't.

23 years as an educator and I know someone who lost her job for it. At a different school this week, a custodian lost his job for grabbing a bully. Sometimes the circumstances make it understandable, but it absolutely should never happen.

Of course you haven't done anything wrong by reporting your child saying an adult hit them.

The school will investigate whether the allegation you reported is correct.

You just need to leave this thread because it's just more bullying. Don't read anymore.

The impression you have formed is incorrect. In my experience (15+ years working with children) the only children I have met that did not lie were non verbal. It is a damaging and inaccurate myth to perpetuate that autistic people cannot or do not lie.
People with autism are individuals and there is simply no one size fits all that says “they can’t do X” or “autistic people are Y”.

Particularly when the boy’s mother announces how she and the 7 yo girl have a daily discussion on her sons needs

Babe? 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Im sure your son only ever sees you acting as a civilised human being then

What an ignorant comment.

Several people have argued that no teacher would ever hit a child because it would end their career. The comments here suggest otherwise. When adults are automatically believed over children, accountability becomes unlikely, and that dynamic is exactly how many individuals and institutions have been able to harm children without consequences, the Catholic Church being a well‑known example.

The truth is that many teachers are not trained to work effectively with children who have special needs. I don’t think this is entirely their fault; teacher‑training programs should have a more rigorous selection process, and the training itself needs to better prepare people for the realities of the classroom. Not everyone is suited to this profession.

My ASD daughter was physically grabbed by the arm and dragged back into the classroom in secondary school by a stand in bank staff teacher, after she used her time out pass to leave the classroom so she could regulate after becoming upset in class. Luckily it was in front of the whole class so other children went with her to report it to the pastoral team. I received a phone call from the school that day to say that the teacher was marched out of the school as soon as it was reported and likely wouldn't be teaching again and he certainly wouldn't be allowed back in that school.

Is it possible that other children witnessed what happened with your child? I do hope he's okay, my daughter was much older and was very reluctant to attend school again for a short time after.

Well I hold my hands up and say I'm wrong then. Yet in my own lersonal experience as someone with ND, with a child also with ND and a paediatric nurse I have never encountered any such behaviour. Maybe I'm naive, but I would always believe a child first and investigate second.

My son has Dyspraxia and often told me me he was shoved and pushed. This was in fact other kids brushing past him lining up, or easing him. To him, it WAS assault as he has massive sensory issues.

Ask him to show you what the smack looked like. Maybe was hit. Maybe he interpreted it as a hit.

I have had head teachers say things to me that would be carer ending for them. Just because they shouldn't, doesn't mean they don't.

But try to unpick it first.

@livelovelough24

Agree but I think it’s unlikely in this case. The post is very off. At one point OP states her child has the brain capacity of a 1 year old but then also states he doesn’t lie. In the context of this particular thread? unlikely.

Nevertheless, school will refer to the LADO.

So one of your patients says you smashed them on to a trolley and stabbed them? Clearly happened didn’t it? Bye bye nmc reg…

This is not a guarantee of the truth either.
I work in a school, all kids lie but I’ve never seen a teacher hit a child.

I've worked specifically with children who have autism for over 20 years (just retired yay!)
We have had children who cannot be left alone with staff... because they make allegations , sometimes serious, which then of course have to be investigated.
Often, as others have said they have misinterpreted a tone of voice, genture etc, because a lot of kids with ASD DO misinterpret sound, touch, gesture.

Others flat out lie (one child I worked with went home and told her parents the teacher had shut her in the cupboard... interesting as the only cupboard was up high on the wall!) others have made up stories of being hit. Children with ASD really can lie!

Cool down, ask for it to be investigated...it will be, as these things are taken very seriously.
And take him out of that school..., it sounds like there is terrible religious teaching if that's true about the lying!

I wondered about that too. A six-year old who was developmentally one would not be in a mainstream school.

Please don't suggest that I'm bullying the OP. I'm most certainly not.

"smashed them onto a trolley and stabbed them" - what are you actually talking about? Have you ever worked in a hospital? There would be witnesses for a start. Give over.

Maybe you’ve met some great liars @rainbows40

However, even if the child was known to be a notorious liar, this incident should still be reported and investigated as any other. Allegations of harm from professionals must be taken seriously every time.

Just so sad - poor distressed mum, poor ill child, poor harassed teacher, rubbish for all.

You are the one saying if a child says something happened it did, the child can’t lie…

I was actually referring to a child being lifted on to a trolley and blood being taken, but remember you are the one saying the child’s version of events is always the truth..

@rainbows40

You will not always have witnesses on shift as a nurse. I’ve been alone with nurses in rooms. As a paediatric nurse you are not the best qualified to comment on the behaviour of all ND children. They can and do lie. Respectfully you’re a nurse, not a psychologist. Also having one child with ND doesn’t make you an expert.

Yo are doing the right thing believing him . Has any if te other kids saw it ? If so go to the police too . That is 100% not acceptable