Private school education - Is it really worth it?

[Mememe1234]

My husband and I earn a good living which is well above the average however we both come from humble beginnings. I was raised by a single mum so money was always tight and my husband was raised by mum and dad who worked in admin and as a tradesman. This means that we have always had limited financial means.

However now as adults we have worked incredibly hard to improve our financial situation and both degree, master degree education, living in an expensive part of the UK etc... Some of our neighbors come from vastly different backgrounds to us, private school educated, parents with high profile jobs etc...

Now my neighbor and i have this on-going conversation about private school. She has no doubt that her only son will go to private school whilst my eldest son is currently in state school. I'm pro state school however i have looked into private. We could afford it but it would mean using a huge proportion of our income etc... We also have two kids so having 1 would be a lot more affordable.

For anyone who has kids in private school, what is the reason you chose it? I know its got smaller classes etc but i could hire a private tutor instead which would be even more focused. I personally benefitted more from private tutoring when a kid as large group setting was challenging when i wanted to ask a specific question and be heard as I've always been more introverted.

The cost of private school is £24k a year. With two kids its £50k including lunch and doesn't even include summer holidays, inset days, half terms etc... The thought of spending that much money makes me feel a bit sick.

Now tell me is it worth it?

Research findings

https://www.ucl.ac.uk/ioe/news/2019/nov/rich-resources-private-schools-give-pupils-educational-advantage-ioe-research-shows

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/03054985.2019.1669551

Not necessarily so. It depends on what you do with your "more money".

It entirely depends on your child and local state schools. For both of mine, it is worth every penny.
Oldest has SENDs that are addressed well in our “caring ethos“ Prep, but would not at all be addressed in local state schools. Putting him in a state schools would deprive him of an education, its as simple as that.
Youngest would be ok academically, but is a gifted ballet dancer. A private school is a much better place for him. Our local schools are not exactly supportive of boys doing anything else than football or rugby….

@Mememe1234 You DC sounds happy and thriving, so why change? You can make the decision later if need be, depending on available options. Your DC is already immensely lucky (Privileged? - loaded term) to have educated, successful and well-informed parents What you could do is make sure you don't vote Tory at the next election, to give the state sector the best chances!

Yes, some move on to private sector.

In general case it is so, don't think state sector yiled better efficiency per £

So then they will be fully aware of what you class as "best practice".

I have one ds. He's a 'maths head', maybe a little bit of a nerd.

He doesn't like football which set him apart from the other boys at his 120 pupil state primary school, and it didn't help. He ended up being a bit of a loner. In year 5 he went for a taster day at the local 1600 pupil comprehensive school and didn't like it. I wasn't impressed either. I thought it disorganised and chaotic.

We applied for and he was awarded a scholarship at a small independent school with a strong maths/science department. He's happy, growing in confidence, doing well, going into yr 11 and on track for 8s & 9s at GCSE. As a single mum, even half fees are a big stretch for me but only three years to go. 😳

The school has been great. Good pastoral care. Lots of encouragement.

This study does not conflict with my position that private school is not worth the money. The average grade outcome is not in question.

Is sending to private school the only way to achieve a good (relative to potential) educational outcome or simply one very expensive way? As a parent it helps to understand why those in state schools who achieve good (relative to potential) outcomes do so.

Deciding which is "better" involves you deciding what it is you want your children to get out of education. All 3 of my children went to different schools because they were very different children with very different needs. One school was private; one a pay-what-you-can-afford (outside of the state system), and one was state. They all then went to the local sixth form college after GCSEs. They all got good degrees, one has a post-graduate qualification, and they all have good jobs now.

But - the one who went to a private school got a distorted negative view of her abilities because she was surrounded by "golden" children who belonged to the National Youth Orchestra/Choir/played hockey for the county etc. - you get the picture. One was bullied relentlessly by bitchy girls in her state secondary; another ticked along fine in hers but found it all very boring and regarded it as a total waste of time - she went through the motions in order not to finish up in a "dead-end" job.

I now have GC at different schools, both state and private. The state children are hounded by Ofsted and the national curriculum strait-jacket; the ones in the private school have so many more opportunities - for example, one expressed an interest in playing in a jazz band (she had the relevant skills) and in the end one was formed and there were teachers capable of arranging the music, or the school had the means to buy these in. No way would this have happened in the state system.

I would look at some private schools and see if any meet your expectations and wishes. State schools now are underfunded and over-micromanaged to a stultifying degree. I am a school governor and know this! What those in the private system are gaining is the freedom of that school to be imaginative and extend what is meant by education. There is also very clear discipline and academic learning is not seen as a sissy's pursuit - it is the norm.

But in the end it is horses for courses, and only you know what is best for your children. There are scholarships available at most private schools - some on the basis of need and others academic.

They are aware of it when they leave but time marches on. Obviously.

In addition changes can be one reason teaches wish to move to private sector. It is known to be easier due to smaller classes. There are also many private schools who make 'traditional' a selling point.

So you think that private schools don't continue to develop their staff and teaching methods?

"- for example, one expressed an interest in playing in a jazz band (she had the relevant skills) and in the end one was formed and there were teachers capable of arranging the music, or the school had the means to buy these in. No way would this have happened in the state system."

Of course it's very unlikely to have happened in a state school-there just isn't the money for that sort of thing. Parents can pay separately as opposed to it being part of the fees.

Private schools vary massively in terms of their offering, culture and cost. I do think you have to match up the right school for the right child. Personally, we use a private school for the vast range of extra-curricular activities on offer in school (logistics have a big impact with 3 children), smaller classes and convenience. We expect the very best and offering as standard because we are paying, but it's not our primary driving factor. Will the experience yield better results...it's hard to say. We are engaged, well off parents which is what children really need. For us it is totally worth it but as the state schools round here are good, it's only worth it as we can comfortably afford it. I know some parents make big sacrifices in terms of holidays, lifestyle, pensions. I just wouldn't be prepared to do that.
Go for a visit, get a feel and decide what it is you are looking for. That should help you make up your mind.

Best academic offering

Is sending to private school the only way to achieve a good (relative to potential) educational outcome or simply one very expensive way?

What is the measure of a good educational outcome? What is the alternative way? To find an unicorn state school that has 3x times efficiency to use the funding budget compared to an average private school?

The thought of spending that much money makes me feel a bit sick.

Now tell me is it worth it?

If the thought of spending £24k a year on private school for each child makes you sick, don’t do it. It won’t be worth it for you, you’ve stated many reasons why you don’t want to, or need to, and if you think your son’s school is great and he’s thriving in the large classes etc, why bother. I’m not going to bother trying to convince you as you already seem convinced. I doubt it isn’t a question where you genuinely are open to hearing different answers.

If you can’t see the value, it won’t be worth it for you.

Of course you might well end up spending almost as much money on buying your new house next to a great state school, and then tutors, activities, music lessons, sports clubs, after school clubs etc

But if you’re happier spending it that way rather than private, good for you.

This is a really interesting article! Thanks for sharing.

It’s only worth it if you can comfortably afford it. Not worth stress or arguments at home for example. I believe a stable home life also plays a part of confidence and academic success and all the other trappings that private educations gives you.

that said, my husband and I were both privately educated and so are our children and we are grateful to be able to do that: but we only did it once we knew we could easily afford it. Neither of us would cope with financial security very well.

I went to a private secondary school. My parents decided it was better than the terrible discipline in my catchment secondary school so they saved for me to go. It was fine, but I did feel a bit at sea as lots of people came from wealthier families. There were also many bright kids there so I went from being the brightest at my primary to very middle of the road, which was hard to accept. There was also a lot of bullying and zero pastoral care when I suffered a very traumatic bereavement (but I'm sure things have improved in 20 odd years).

All in all, it was fine and I got a good education, went to uni and am a professional. Fortunately I live somewhere where the catchment secondary is very good, so my child will be able to go there.

If you’ve got a spare £50,000 a year and a good local state secondary with a tiny catchment area, you might feel it’s less of a ‘waste’ to buy a house in that catchment area. Chances are it will be a far more expensive mortgage than a house in the catchment of a less good school but at least at worst you should get most of the money back when you sell (at best, you will make a profit). If you do this, be absolutely sure you are well within catchment, though - I know people who bought near me and then the catchment boundaries changed.

Of course, if all your local secondaries are dire and a good month is one where the police only get called for assault with fists rather than weapons being used, I think you need to grit your teeth and pay the private school fees (and hope your kids might be scholarship material).

Our Ofsted Outstanding village state school didn’t make the effort to get to know either of our children. They refused to accept that our elder boy is autistic and the younger was bored rigid rather than some sort of devil-child. We moved them to a small private school which looked after and supported our elder son wonderfully well until it became apparent that he needed to be at a special school. The first time they met our younger son they realised that he would benefit from being on an accelerated learning programme, and his behaviour improved instantly. Our younger is an actor, singer and dancer and at the private senior school he attended now he can be who he is and nobody bats an eyelid. However some of his theatre friends attend the local comps and they all fiercely hide their hobbies for fear of being picked on.

This is just one state school and two private schools. As so many others have said, there are vast ranges of quality in both sectors. But for us, going private has been best for our children.

Many state schools genuinely are good or excellent.

The question is whether private school is worth it educationally.

Let's say private costs £100k (that's pretty low actually) and it gets your kid from 3xB in not amazing subjects to 3xA in good subjects, plus good friends, plus outside interests.

Is there another way to get there that costs less? My view is there is.

If you want the social exclusivity, obviously only private can provide that.

You have to discount bullying, it can happen anywhere.

State issues primary
Never seen senco
Not pushed with reading
Struggled with maths in y1 despite clever and capable and felt useless at it.
Not pushed for ks1 sats as that affects schools progress for ks2
Never had 1 piece of homework marked (maths online/ sats workbooks marked by classmates
Could easily have moved from met to exceeding
Poor pe. Every single child doing well at sports day is from sport outside school. Even clubs after school are low quality. LEaving kids doing no extra curriculars overweight and slow at running etc. Our pe is sometimes forest school so no sport
Swimming : even before covid dc would have only had 12 school lessons.
Post covid they are testing so many kids will have 0 school lessons.
Despite sen no transition to secondary.
Dc1 went from exceeding reading at ks1 (almost full marks) to meeting at ks2 so little progress.
Without the pressure on state of ks2 sats.the school would have made no effort. And many children would be.at completely different level.
As 60 kids they mixed classes from reception and then had no control of the kids and it being overwhelming.