Attendance of a child with diagnosed health conditions not good enough.

[EducationalWelfareMakeMeCry]

I am not handling this well.

This is not the first time this bunch have done this.

I took my child out of school for a spell to homeschool, as we couldn't cope with school and being hounded over attendance.

My child went back for year ten, and is ending that year now.

The lowest attendance level in the past was about 48%.

The more the pressurisation the worse attendance gets as it depresses my child. Their bullying and pressure is why it got so low in the past.

Left alone the attendance has been the best ever this year high 80's. I got a letter a few weeks ago and another today. They are on attack mode again.

They are abusing laws put in for truants to bully ill children so they can box tick. I am fuming. I told them to take me to court. The school seem to want nothing to do with it and it's all the LA now. School have been nice to my child since I told them we would be inviting the press to court if they take me.

My child has the same condition as a girl who appears in the Daily Mail health section today. She also has the same condition as the girl who has produced the Deliciously Ella cookbooks.

My child struggles to attend is in bed as soon as she gets home. Has her feet raised as they are so a hey this evening. She is exhausted and has no life outside trying to pass her GCSE exams and these shit heads are saying it's not good enough.

I am not paying g their fines and if she wants a day off she will. They are going to set targets for attendance without me. That's best if I go to the meeting I will go volcanic at them. What happens if I go to court?

These people and medical people have given me PTSD from all the years of hell they put us through. I can't go near them. I am fine intreacting with other people in society, I avoid these people who hurt us so I don't get upset/cry or get angry.

Engaging with them will be less traumatic than being taken to court. And even if it ends up in court your refusal to engage will go against you.

The article is horrible and tragic. But irrelevant to your problem with the LA.

I can hear the pain and upset and frustration in all your posts. I'm so sorry your DD is so ill, and good on her for trying her best. Don't let her down by going all conspiracy theory. She needs you to fight her corner like a parent should. Get someone else to do it if you can't.

There is nobody else.

I don't want anything to do with those smug superior robotic knobheads.

Oh it's idiotic isn't it? My son's school is meant to achieve the same attendance figures as regular schools. His is a special school for the most severely disabled in the local area, many of the children and young people have extended hospital days. All are severely disabled - often with severe health problems.

So I sympathise. Is there any scope for internet school or something for year 11 (e.g. interhigh)

She is actually happy at school and likes it there. It was a new school to us. Not perfect, better than the rest and good enough.

Life is hard enough without these people doing this to us.

We are better off on our own. They don't understand us or our needs and interventions before just make things worse not better.

They mutilated our bodies, minds and education through them not understanding our needs nor meeting them.

They can't help so I am not putting myself in pain and feeling ill to be spoken to like a piece of shit by a pen pusher.

You have my sympathy. I feel stressed enough when the school get on our case about normal childhood illnesses.

Yikes.

Go back to home ed if dealing with school makes you this angry, Ill and gives you 'PTSD' .
School is not compulsory.

Heels, last post acknowledgin you. Take the boots off and go do something nice.

I can't organise exams and assessments for gcse's due to depression and ptsd. I would homeschool otherwise.

I don't want to work with them. I did before and that's how I got ptsd. I didn't have ptsd before I engaged with them.

I also took advice from a private educational psychologist who worked with our family for years. The advice I received was we will never get fair treatment and for me to disengage. To get my child to sort their own health, for me to try to get well again I won't get well interacting with people who made me ill, speak down to us, have no clue how to treat us, dont have the child's welfare at heart only say they do and have their own agenda.

My Dd has the same condition, had attendance rate of about 70% years 7&8, then absent all of years 9,10 and 11 as so unwell.
Was horrendous time as was not diagnosed for a long time. School never gave us grief for her lack of attendance as our consultant wrote to them. Also I kept them fully informed, got work and eventually managed to get the council to pay for online education for her.
Do you have POTS specialist?

She was seen in Hammersmith Hospital, a report was posted out with a diagnosis and no pharmaceutical treatment. Just left to get on with it, under the care of a consultant who reported us to ss due to his lack of knowledge.

Ss closed the case as they have every time this happens.

I can't take them doing this to us any more.

You need to see a POTS specialist. My Dd also had tests at Hammersmith. If you go on POTS UK there are a list of doctors with interest in POTS. Most GP's and lots of Consultants have no experience with POTS at all.
You need a Consultant to back you to get school off your back.

I know nothing about the condition..So sorry for my ignorance...What does come accross in your post though is we a lot. I think for the health of your child can you protect her from the attendance issues.

Stressed33 seems to have a good idea of a way forward though.

I need them to leave me the Fuck alone and concentrate on truants not people who are ill.

They are making us illet. Stress be it physical or emotional makes me ill too, as dd inherited all this from me.

To be blunt I was relieved there was no pharmaceutical treatment for my child. They are off licence and the children are guinea pigs. As are we all as they have no fucking clue what they are doing with us.

I ran around spending time making myself in pain, ill and thousands of pounds before.

I am not doing that again so some fucking knob can tick a fucking box.

I completely understand what you're saying and why you have no interest in interacting with these people again, but could you print out some info on PoTS for them, and the diagnosis letter?

Here is something from BMJ Open, if you haven't already seen it:
bmjopen.bmj.com/content/4/6/e004127.full?sid=6f73580b-77f6-436e-95f3-4d9584836df5 and there are other articles in that journal too.

It's recognised as being like CFS but with heavier symptom burden, and that it's poorly recognised or understood by most medical practitioners; so even the fact that that is stated in that article should help the jobsworths understand that your DD is up against it in both medical and health terms.

I do hope that you can find someone to help you deal with this to get them off your back.

I sent articles and diagnosis before and recently. I will check out your link and see if I have sent that before. Thank you.

I just want to be left alone. They can't help us. My child does physio etc and drinks as per advice. There is no more to be done and I accept that. I am upset and grieve that is how it is. I really don't need extra pressure.

It's not just pots my child has. Pots is a comorbidity condition.

My child is happy. Much happier than before as I am not being pushed around. I am not passing on their pressure as I did before. I told dd you keep doing as you are, I know my child is pushing herself and when she has enough and needs time off she will and I will not say a word to her.

I choose court rather than running around after the medical profession this time.

I worked out part of why i goy PTSD was being pushed around.

I am choosing this time.

I am showing my childthis time I will not be pushed around.

I am showing my chillness this time you can stand up to anyone no matter who they are when you have done no wrong.

I have guilt from last time being so weak and pathetic playing their game like their puppet. I have guilt and anger I modelled that to my child. I hate myself for putting pressure on my child to go to scool to get those fucking knobs off my back. I hate myself for wrecking my relationship with my child because I was scared and buckled to them.

I can understand to a point your attitude, my Dd also inherited her illnesses from me. I just think that not getting her to see good specialists is making your situation worse.
We now have great team around Dd, it has taken 12 years of illness though to get it. There is treatment to help POTS.
I have never felt so helpless with my Dd's illness but I know now she is getting the best treatment and support possible.
I'm sorry to say this but you really need to get over your attitude, there are good doctors out there who could help you. I know you've had bad experiences, I fought for years to get my Dd believed and diagnosed, but I never gave up.
Go on POTS UK like I previously suggested, read the stories and find a good Doctor on there.

She has been to see all the top experts and she has been discharged. There is nothing they can do.

I am sorry things are so hard for you and your DD is so ill.

I cannot see how you will improve things for you or her is you are unable to engage with the school?
Can you seek help for yourself? Get some specialist help to manage your stress and how angry you are - it cannot be good for you to feel like this

Are you familiar with POTS UK?
Might they be able to help you get the appropriate support for your DD?

I agree it is unfair that you have to battle and fight for your DD but it's either that or leave her to it which does not seem right either.
You say she enjoys school and that's great. Forget about the attendance battle, don't take it personal, as is the way of the world now everybody has to jump through hoops incl the LEA and the school. Chances are they are not picking on you or your DD, but her condition, as you know, is not widely known about and they don't know what to do with her.

Seek help. It won't come to you I am afraid.
I really hope you feel better soon and that your DD will have a good school year after the summer.

Ok, I sent something to them. With some links, one bjm article kindly linked here.

I feel so much better. I have felt a victim for years. Scared and walking on egg shells. I feel I have left an abusive relationship actually.

I am going to get on with my life. I hope my child picks up my attitude. Maybe she won't take all I took. There is nothing wrong in standing up for what is right. I wish I had done it years ago. It's not right to punish unwell people for a shoddy system you put in place.

I guess nobody is going to offer any advice on court, just advice on how to be a good girl run around to please others, don't rock the boat. Well I tried that, it made me miserable, now I will try this.

I don't think anyone is advising you "run round to please others". My advice is to get a good Consultant to back you and the LEA have absoluty no case. I'm talking from experience, as I said previously my Dd was put of school for 3 years, we had no problems with attendance officers as it was all in writing from Consultant.
Her exams were done at home with an invigilator, again all that was needed for that was a consultants letter.
You may think you're doing your best for your daughter but until you find her a good Consultant you are I'm afraid letting her down.
As you know POTS is a chronic condition that needs medication and monitoring. We see one of the top paediatric POTS specialists in London and Dd will continue seeing her till she's handed over to adult care, that is what your daughter should be receiving. As said before you need to find new consultant and ask your GP for referral.

The trouble is you seem to have lost sight of the fact your daughter is really enjoying going to school. You might have to put your issues aside for her sake and try your best to work with them to support her so she can get the very best results she's capable of in her exams next year, not to mention see her friends and do the other things that teenagers do!

The more difficult and confrontational you become in your dealings with them, the harder it will be for you to keep your daughter in the education system that she's finding helpful. It is miles better for you to channel your energy into working positively with the school and the LEA rather than fighting with them every step of the way. I agree with the poster who suggested looking into getting an advocate who can help you put your concerns across in the most helpful way possible so hopefully you can come up with a plan ready for the new term in September.

Wishing you and your daughter all the best in what are clearly very difficult circumstances.