Binge eaters accountability thread

[LucyLatimer]

A thread to check in and say how we are feeling with no judgment. Taking one day at a time.

I didn’t even have a wedding becausr I was so embarrassed by how I look 😢 we just did a registry office with two witnesses and took one photo which absolutely breaks my heart when I look at it.

That's really sad. We are our own worst enemies sometimes.

Absolutely. Hope everyone has had a good day today.

Good morning. I am back at work today and I will attempt to have 3 meals and nothing else. I will think about them when I get to them and stay busy and out of the kitchen. Let’s see what happens and see if I can start to build a new habit and deal with stress as it happens. Hope you all have a good day, and come and chat if you need it or if you don’t. @PashunFroot i really identified with what you say about wedding photos, I did the same thing and never felt confident to be looked at.

Bookmarking to come back to later. A lot of what has been said on this thread really resonates with me, I just have to get up and get ready for work at the mo!

Reassuring to read other people are the same.

I'm at work today but not teaching until the afternoon. There's always chocolate in the staff office and I tend to eat a lot then replace it. I'm bringing my breakfast and lunch and made sure it's food I like. I'll see how I go, not making myself ridiculous promises as I hate myself if I break them 🤦🏽‍♀️

I usually do intermittent fasting as it makes me feel less bloated (not for diet reasons just makes me feel better) but not been doing it recently as I've felt like crap but then I'm in a viscious cycle of making it worse! I need to try to get back into it as it does make me feel better. I only do 10-7 so nothing extreme...,obviously cos food is life! 🙄
With regards to clothes, those who bought stuff that fits then now, how do you cope with looking different? I just don't know what to wear! Also did you through out your too small clothes?

I would suggest that you tak some snacks. Without snacks you are likely to feel like you are depriving yourself and when your willpower is low you may end up having a binge. 3 meals and no snacks sounds like a 'diet' to me.

I've gradually put on weight. I swing between a size 14 and a 16 but for me it's mainly on my boobs and tummy so some things still fit but I just don't look as good. It's always best to give your old clothes to charity. It will make you feel good to help other people out and you won't have the old clothes there damaging your self esteem. I look in the mirror and I don't particularly like what I see but I'm learning to accept it for now. I can look nice still, I try to dress nicely. I'm older now and I've had a tough few years with covid, living in a country where the airport closed and a military coup happening so it's not been easy. Once you start letting go of blaming yourself you may find a bit of peace inside which stops the negitive thoughts.

And I still wear the same style of stuff. Skinny jeans, t shirts, short shirt dresses. For holiday I've bought some jeans shorts as my legs are pretty good. I've changed my bikini to a tankini style, as the bra one I have is too small and gives me too many lumps and bumps. I do need to buy some bigger jeans. It feels horrible having to buy the next size up but I know that feeling comfy in them will make me happy and I won't be constantly reminded (by a digging in waist band) that I've put on weight. So it's a win win really. 🤷‍♀️

@BusterGonad we sound like the same shape. I am a tall apple too and my uniform is skinny jeans a vest and a T-shirt to keep the tum and boobs in check and even it out with skinny legs. I'm off of on holiday on Saturday, if the flight isn't cancelled and have bough some of the short kaftan dresses for a bit of a change on holiday, and a black tankini. Where you live sounds like it must be stressful in itself. What you say about being 'bikini ready' resonates, all of the magazine article and crash diets to always feel too squashy to wear a bikini. Anyway, this time I will go as I am and try not to worry. So this morning, I got up and had my marmite on toast and sat down to eat it, not doing anything else. Now I have hit my first danger time of day. I had what I wanted for, and objectively don't feel hungry. This is the time of day where I start binging, don't really what to get started with work and the week, feeling like a need 'something'... If I was talking to myself, I would say just keep busy until 12 and think about it then.

We do sound similar, keeping the boobs and tummy in check is all I ever do! Lol. I like to wear dresses that define my (lack of) waist! My flight was actually cancelled and we need to wait until 24 hours before the original flight to be rebooked onto another schedule. I do not know why they just can't book it now but there you go. At the moment, for me, a day of not binging is a win. So I'm happy to eat a few biscuits and a chocolate bar etc so long as I don't go into robotic mode and eat everything in sight. I find if I give myself permission to have 2 biscuits at 10am and another snack at 3pm I'm doing well. I always have a glass of wine in the evening too.

And I've left the 'stressful' country and jumped into the frying pan as I'm now in Egypt. But we move again in August and I'm hoping for a fresh start. 😊

I'm a medium height with HUGE (peri-menopause) boobs and big tummy, which I think is typical in binge eaters tbh

I'm Size 16-18 which is the biggest I've ever been. I struggle shopping because all the plus size models are beautiful hour glass and look fab (and are often like a size 12 anyway!) there's a lot of smock shapes and empire line in fashion and frankly they either hang off my boobs like a tent or I look very pregnant!

My legs are ok but jeans etc hard to get as my thighs and bum are 14-16 but tummy is 16-18. I like my skinnies too but big T-shirts are too tent like!

I'm trying really hard to accept my body but another issue is I have chronic pain and had to give up running 3 years ago. It's not just the shape it's also that I can't do anything with my stupid broken body 😭

I need some positivity but it's hard.

That sounds awful, I'm sorry you are going through this. I was diagnosed myself with crohn's disease, which was the start of my downward spiral, for two reasons, one I felt very depressed having a life long condition and two because I just couldn't tolerate my usual healthy foods like salad, and fibre rich vegetables and fruit. I felt very lost and sad and no one (husband mainly) really understood my feelings. For us with big boobs and round tummies I do find dresses with belts helpful and ones that are more fitted with darts. Which can be hard to get that will accommodate the boobs too. Shirts dresses are good because you can undo the top buttons and add a vest. I've found a few Mango dresses good too and a lot have elastic at the back so will stretch out for the boobs but hug your waist too. I never wear big t shirts, I always size down so they are fitted and I look terrible in maxi dresses. They make me look like a big fat barrel. 😂 I'm currently a size 16. I'm the heaviest I've ever been. My boobs are the biggest they've ever been too. 😂 I'm 5ft 10in so I do carry it quite well. At this moment though I'm just trying to manage to control my binging.

Not sure if this will help anyone but i have the Habit app.
I have habits listed as “no chocolate”, “no crackers”, “no cake” etc. Basically all the things I can’t stop eating once I start.
I also have “no junk between 4-5” and “no junk between 5-6” etc.
If I get to the end of the day and haven’t eaten one of those things I can tick it off. If I manage one of the hourly chunks without bingeing I can tick that off.
It feels like a small win and normally we only give ourselves credit for doing positive things rather than not doing negative things.

I'm actually wearing a shirt dress today 👍 my friend gave it to me though and she's always been bigger than me but now I'm wearing her hand me downs (or hand me ups?) I'm dead chuffed for her as she has diabetes so her weight loss is fab but it doesn't make me feel much better!

What I need is a lush shopping day all by myself or with a friend (I usually have teens with me 🤦🏽‍♀️) that I can try things on leisurely but the prob is shopping is one of the worst things for pain. So annoying! I think I'll do it though to make me feel better.

I think a shopping day will give you a boost. Take plenty of coffee breaks to ease the pain a bit. My son often comes shooing with me which can be a bit annoying but he's good company too. I think the kinder we are to ourselves the more chance we have of overcoming our binge eating. Ive just had 2 cadburys chocolate sandwich biscuits and I'm feeling content with that. I won't eat until lunch now. I'll probably have some Malteasers tonight and a glass of wine after my dinner and that's okay as I'm no longer aiming for perfection. Just improvement. 😊

Hey everyone, can I join?

I have such a ridiculous relationship with food it's unreal.

I was brought up in an overweight family, weighed 22 stone by the age of 20. Snacks were always readily available and we all binged, so none of us needed to hide it from each other.

Escaped to uni, lost 12 stone by changing my lifestyle and habits. I was a perfect weight for the first time in my life, and maintained a healthy BMI for a decade.

Then lockdown hit, I had nothing to do, nowhere to go, and I started binging again.

I know all that is over now, but I have 5 stone to lose and I just can't get out of the habit.

I can't get rid of bad food from the house as we have a teenager and DP who manage to moderate, but like the occasional snack.

Even if bad food is removed, I'll order something, or eat piles of toast.

I'm finding it so difficult and just 'need' to eat ALL the time.

I need to get back into healthy habits and get rid of this weight. I don't want to waste my 30s being overweight like I wasted my childhood and teenage years.

hi @LindaEllen food is the one thing that will always be around no matter what isnt it.. I also have a teen in the house, and so lots of snack food, but I try to buy the kind that I don't like that much. When the binge needs strikes, I will eat pretty much anything, which makes me feel bad as I didn't even enjoy it. Keep talking, my actions are better than my thoughts today but I am doing OK so far. It makes sense what many are saying that we need to try and back off from thoughts of diets and weight loss and get to a place where food is just fuel. Good luck

Oh I can empathise with many of you...I have the big boobs too, am perimenopausal (mid 40s) have chronic pain, and also have a bowel condition which means need to be careful with fibre in foods..

It's really hard. The diet sheet they gave me- low fibre, lists things which I would binge on such as biscuits, custand and jelly!

I sometimes go to an aqua aerobics class (but didn't make it today) which is kind of good as many there are overweight and it's pretty easy. Need to get back to that again. Or swimming.

I have found, I binge more when drinking (I like a glass or more of wine) not sure if others have found this too. And also with this diet plan which basically allows the sweet things etc it's not easy...

@Orangesandlemons77

This is one if the reasons I don't drink much! Prob only once a fortnight have a gin or cider!

Smoking is my other vice though Ive not smoked since November. I've smoked on and off since I was 15, I've had years breaks and still started again! It's one of the reasons I binge more at the moment 🤦🏽‍♀️

Are you on HRT? I need to persuade my doctor, he was very dismissive last time I mentioned in but my symptoms have ramped up so I don't think he can ignore it now. I'm hoping Hrt will help with the pain. I'd be so much happier if I could run, running used to be my happy place!

I'm not on HRT but I am on meds for depression (Prozac) I am considering HRT but unsure atm.

I happened to notice Prozac can be used for Bulimia, but it's not seeming to help with the bingeing.

I have co-codamol for pain which helps some

Joining!
I'm thinking about hypnosis!
I eat for comfort, a treat to cheer myself up, boredom. I could easily binge on anything really.
I'm a size 12 slowly creeping up to a 14. I have just joined the gym and been going swimming. Hoping will help.

I would also recommend Brain over binge - listen to the podcasts

Brain over Binge

It has helped me so much in trying to understand myself. I impose no rules and have gradually managed to get on top of my eating habits. As simple as it sounds I have stopped buying my trigger foods (crisps and sweet stuff) as i just cannot have it here without eating it. This is not a diet, diets are what led us to disordered eating in the first place. At 45 I have been tying myself up in knots over my relationship with food and needed to reagin some sort of control. It is not an easy path but I havent binged for some months now and feel so so much better about myself.