My DD has bulimia.

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As the title really. My dd has bulimia. I found out on the 5th November 2013 and she's been in a eating disorder unit since.
Currently, she weighs 3st 4 and last Wednesday she had a nasal-gastric drip inserted as she wasn't eating.
I am looking for advice and hands to hold please. I don't know if I'm posting this in the right place.
How can I not blame myself?

Sorry to hear your appointment was cancelled, Bun. I think it would be worth going for a few times before you decide about it. It can be tough at first, before yiu get to know each other, and rhere can be many misunderstandings. I decided early on that when I felt they were undermining my parenting (not my authority, don't mind that, I mean making out I didn't do my best or I don't care well enough for DD) I would say so. This really helped, they backpedalled furiously and used more affirming and supportive language after that.

Zing, you are at that lovely stage of house moving. Have you made a floor plan of the new house on squared paper and cut out scale drawings of the furniture? I love it when you move somewhere bigger and it all fits! (Happened for first time with this house).

Love to both you and your SD, and to you and all your brood, zing.

I'm here Zing whenever you need to talk xx. That's wonderful news about the house move.
It's a shame it was cancelled as I wanted another chance at it. I spoke to a nurse about it and she's told me to tell the therapist when I don't like something as it should help.
I've seen DD today and painted her nails pink for you Zing. I can take her for a walk outside of the unit on Monday, not for long but it'll be good for her. She can see the dog and pop home to pick a few more things up that she wants.

She can pop home!!!!

that is just excellent news! really proud of her, she's making such a great progress!

(Thanks for pink socks/nails, so sweet of you!)

is it difficult to schedule another family consultation?

I don't suppose her returning home has been mentioned yet, but it's something I really hope will be on the agenda soon.

yego

yes, definitely surrounded by several copies of the floorplan and sheets of info, furniture measurements etc!

I really feel drained after all the excitement yesterday and all the planning and today is bittersweet (I have a thread going about our Pink Day) but it's all good.

Nothing yet about coming home properly but coming home for an hour is wonderful. She is still far too ill to be treated as an outpatient.
It isn't hard - we have family therapy weekly but it is a pain when it is cancelled suddenly.

oh, yes, it's tough when you build up to it and it's just cancelled.

one hour at home is just brilliant.
I bet she'll find it strange - like a mix of known yet new somehow.
I wonder what you will do - take dog for a walk or just sit & chat?
I guess maybe you'll just play it by ear, see what she fancies most.

Either way I'm excited for you.

It will be up to her. I suspect she will want to walk the dog.
She needs to get some more toiletries so we may nip to the supermarket.
It depends how she feels.

have a great day TeenBun I hope you'll enjoy a bit of freedom today!

I've just got back from taking DD back to the unit. She wanted to walk the dog so we did that and she got a few more things to take with her. She says that an hour out has made her feel refreshed.

oh that is so lovely to hear!

amimals are such good companions when recovering from illness, I bet she was happy to see her dog!

And of course just going for a walk with you and chatting must have been very relaxing!

I bet you feel happy too.

The dog was very excited to see her! Animals are wonderful companions most of the time but especially when ill.
It was relaxing. She got a few odd looks because of her ng tube but most people we saw smiled and spoke to her.
I'm happy tonight.

(happy hugs) ! xxx

Fantastic! Well done, Bun it must have been hard in some ways too, but best to dwell on all the many positives.

Hope all goes well today.

good luck for today Bun

how's it going YeGods?

Things are looking up, thanks Zing.

DD is being sensible about GCSEs and revision and not trying to make herself conform to someone else's (my) idea of 'good' revision, but doing bits and pieces and then dealing with anxiety with relaxation and distraction instead of (over/obsessive) work. I am so impressed.

She's also spending time with the few friends who have stuck by her and supported her, which is a massive step and she's confronted countless social anxieties to do so, but is rewarded by good friends. I will certainly support those girls and offer them a roof and meals any time they need it. They have had their own troubles to deal with and have still stuck up for Dd (as she has for them).

Looks like her family 'therapy' is petering out. No real psychiatric support to speak of. (The prozac is helping, but a GP is meant to be overseeing it now. ) DD is managing well for now. Will see what the future brings.

I'm starting to get an idea of what mindfulness is and stop fearing the worst. Looking at my own mental health and so better able to be supportive (or just listen).

I'm glad your dd is doing well Ye. Good luck to her for her exams. I am happy for you that she's spending time with her friends and overcoming her anxieties. That is wonderful.
Sorry her family therapy is petering out. I'm glad her Prozac is helping, could you ask for a therapist/psychologist to oversee it instead of a gp?
Another gain this week, 4st 6. The increased feeds are working well.

really happy for both of you.
onwards and upwards!

4st6 is a good increase, especially with the activity of a trip home. Double bonus.

There isn't a psychiatrist available anymore. The last one retired and there is no replacement. Not sure if it is down to funding or lack of available psychiatrists wanting to fill the post. Probably a bit of both. (Don't think they're paying enough).

Today has been good. I'll do a big update tomorrow, I am exhausted.

We had family therapy on Friday. The therapist listened to me and took my side of the story. She didn't mention exh or why I hadn't seeked help sooner. I might have told a nurse if she did that again I wouldn't be happy. She listened to DD and I know what DD wants to do to get better again. It was helpful.

So glad the therapy has had a redirection and is forward thinking now! Wonderful that you and DD both spoke and felt listened to. (((Bun)))

Weigh in tomorrow. I took dds boyfriend with me today. He seems to miss her - I am impressed that a teenage relationship is lasting through this.
I hope he sticks with her, she truly adores him and him her.

It's great to take someone to see her. Important thing will be whether he can give her the space and independence to exercise her own control over the ED and eat plenty without helping the ED make excuses. Very hard to do.

Hope all goes well at weigh in. She is gradually approaching a safer weight. Good that it is happening at a safe slow rate that her body can deal with.

Sorry for not updating sooner. She hasn't gained this week - 4st 6 still. She is heading towards a healthy weight though.