#makeithappen TTC through Donor IUI or Donor IVF or just undecided. All welcome. Thread 11

[kwick]

This thread is for anyone trying to conceive... or thinking about doing so through donor IUI or donor IVF. Nothing TMI - feel free to join, we are a lovely group here to support and help keep the cray-cray away!

Here is the link to the previous thread
Thread 9
Thread 8

Thread 7

Thread 6
Here is the link to the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2832207--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome
Here is the link to the one before that one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2769549-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen-loadsofBFPs
Here is the link to the thread before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2688511-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen
Here is the link to the one before that one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2587046-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome
And the one before that!: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1877198-Donor-IUI

We also have a weight loss spin off thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2889818-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-weight-loss-spin-off-thread

@TreasureInMyTummy I keep in touch with Kwick off here. She is doing good :) hopefully she'll see the @kwick .
Hope you and Little man are good x

Thanks @pickle162. Really happy to hear that.

Hope you doing well. I can't find how to do the pm on the mobile app - is it possible? X

@TreasureInMyTummy not that I can work out however if you click on your email notification from mn to say there is s new message it'll take to mn mobile site-on each message there are 3 dots ... in bottom right hand corner of the message. If click on that it says about pm

Sorry about your negative test result @GingerSnapp.

I didn't miscarry naturally despite some intense cramping so I'm booked in for medical management on Monday.

Awe @TinyPaws sorry to hear that you've got to have further intervention 💐

I'm so sorry to hear that, tiny.

pickle, I was also thinking of kwick - if you speak to her, send her my good wishes too? I am so grateful to her for keeping these threads running.

I'm sitting around for this month, but tentatively thinking about IVF, so wondered if I could run things past the wise women here. I've done two cycles of IUI. Mild stimulation. One felt really off - my body felt strange and I wasn't at all surprised I wasn't pregnant as I could tell I wasn't in a fit state to be. The other felt fine, but wasn't successful, obviously.

We can afford a third IUI cycle. We have two more vials of sperm. We are leaning towards one cycle of IUI, and after that, a round of IVF. Sensible? What are the pros or cons? I'm 33, AMH is high, but I have PCOS, a clotting disorder, one malfunctioning ovary and a history of miscarriage.

Going through similar thought process lrd. After second failed stimulated IUI, DP also has PCOS, we are having an appointment next week to discuss IVF as next option. Our first doc didn't seem to understand that we didn't have a bottomless pit of money so we are seeing someone else this time round. Moving to IVF seems a more viable option sooner rather than later financially.

Does anyone know if you have successful multiple viable embryos, that the same IVF procedure would involve use of all/as many as needed? Or do you have to pay per embryo transfer?

I'm pretty sure you pay per embryo transfer. I'm thinking I'd try egg sharing if I did do IVF, partly because it'd be nice if possible, and partly because it'd reduce the costs. But for me it's also the thought of when we call it a day, I think.

I hope your new doctor is a bit more sensible than the first! It would really wind me up, the assumption you don't need to think about money.

I used an Access Fertility package which covered sperm, two egg collections, the transfer of any embryos (either singly or in twos - I had one at a time apart from the first time), storage etc - everything apart from drugs. It worked out far cheaper than paying separately. If I had gone for the separate payments the first round (collection and transfer) was covered, but I would have had to pay for each frozen transfer - about the same as an IUI cost. I can't remember whether storage was extra or if the first year was included.

Ooh, that's worth knowing about. Thanks late.

Congratulations @pickle162 she's gorgeous! Look after yourself and your little one and enjoy this time. x

@TinyPaws so sorry to hear your news. Try to remain positive. I know it's easier said than done.

Hope everyone else is doing well

I'm so annoyed iv ran out of gonal f pen half way through last night's dose so my nurse miscalculated that I would have enough even when I said I didn't think I would! Now I had a good follie on Tues 15 m so was meant to trigger today or tomorrow as have scan later but now holding out no hope for this cycle at all and it's not even my fault it's so unfair and iv wasted another month of meds money rang clinic this morning they didn't seem to care just said come to scan later see what's happening x

Oh, how annoying! But I would think if you had half the dose it won't make too much difference? My last cycle I was meant to alternate 37.5 and 50 shots, and I totally forgot and just did 37.5, and it made no difference whatsoever.

Really crap they miscalculated, though - mine usually err on the side of making sure you have more than enough, and so they should! Daft question, but how do you know you've run out? I've never dared get too close to the end, and a pen lasts me more than a cycle anyway, so I don''t know, but am now paranoid!

When did the dose it finished at 25 instead of zero. I'm on 50 and in leaflet it says if it still has a number up instead of zero it means pen is empty and you still need to administer the amount shown when you start a new pen x

25 is nothing, though. It shouldn't have a big impact. You need a follicle to be 16mm at minimum, and if it was 15 on Tuesday, it sounds quite hopeful it'd be big enough.

I think if it's not, you ought to ask the clinic for money back for this cycle - it's their fault.

Yes that is a good idea i will ask for that if this doesn't work just hope they haven't shrunk like last cycle that's true it's not much 25 but that means I didn't get much in either as only 25 went in my body got scan at 3 so guess all will be reveiled then x

Follie was 19 today so booked for iui on Monday! X

Wahoo tlc-good luck for Monday x

Ooh! Oh, that is wonderful news. Good luck for Monday.

Thank you :) x

Mini update from me:

Clinic are having trouble synchronising me and donors cycles as we are both irregular but I am at clinic on 25th May for an injection to sync me up with donor although I may be ready a week before her but that's fine. Just a waiting game now

In other news we appointed a Solicitor last week to claim against our local clinic for our failed cycle. Apparently it's all on me and DH is irrelevant and the claim has to be in my name. DH argued we both went through it but I have had to sign a document to "allow" DH to claim on my behalf as I don't need the stress whilst going through the next cycle

No, you definitely don't need that stress! It seems odd to me that fertility clinics are so insistent that partners are investigated - god knows I had a ridiculous number of blood tests while DP was being treated - and yet you had to jump through hoops for your DH to do the legal side.

It must be really good to have a date in sight for the start of treatment, though? I hope so, anyway!

I'm just waiting out this cycle and trying to eat healthy. Feeling a bit blue as a friend of mine just shared on a facebook group we're both in that she's started fertility treatment with her DH and is finding it hard. I sent her a message offering to be a sounding board as I'm doing it too, and she replied quite angrily that she's 'really struggling' and it's not the same for me as I have no idea what it's like to go to fertility treatment for actual issues. Obviously she assumes I'm only needing treatment because we're a same-sex couple, and I know she won't know about anything else because I don't talk about it much, but it upsets me. I was trying to get pregnant ten years ago when I know perfectly well she wasn't even thinking about babies. Still, I guess what it shows is how much more we all ought to be able to talk about this stuff and how little it's commonly known that conceiving isn't easy.

Wow lrd that is really tough to hear from your friend!! Trying to get Pregnant does funny things to people sometimes-don't always get that they aren't the only ones who may be struggling for things to work. That's why this thread is so wonderful that can get support from others who really do understand. Don't let her bring you down xx

LRD I'm so sorry about your friend. I'm realising more and more that fertility problems and miscarriage happen so much more than people say, I don't think they are talked about enough, this makes them very isolating things to experience.

Thanks pickle and Tiny. I'm ok, just feeling a bit thrown back on myself.

pickle, how is the picklet?! And how are you?!

tiny - yes, they happen so much, and I think it's such a huge issue. My DP doesn't know many women with children, and still fewer whose children are their birth children, and she went into the whole thing so absolutely confident. I remember asking her to guess how many pregnancies ended in miscarriage and she guessed about 1 in 30.