#makeithappen TTC through Donor IUI or Donor IVF or just undecided. All welcome. Thread 10

[kwick]

This thread is for anyone trying to conceive... or thinking about doing so through donor IUI or donor IVF. Nothing TMI - feel free to join, we are a lovely group here to support and help keep the cray-cray away!

Here is the link to the previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2944496--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-All-welcome-Thread-9
And the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2908645--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-All-welcome-Thread-8
And the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2886793--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-All-welcome-Thread-7
And the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2863056--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-Thread-6
Here is the link to the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2832207--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome
Here is the link to the one before that one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2769549-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen-loadsofBFPs
Here is the link to the thread before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2688511-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen
Here is the link to the one before that one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2587046-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome
And the one before that!: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1877198-Donor-IUI

We also have a weight loss spin off thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2889818-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-weight-loss-spin-off-thread

wonky sorry your boss was not more happy for you! I have always tried to show great excitement even if inside I am thinking "how the hell will we cover you?"

Lovely picture pickle 😘

Great news ever!

Paid a big chunk of change over to IVI Spain yesterday- still have joy of UK bill - but at least I am one step closer.

Long time off the thread, enjoying a month off and some chilled time. Doctor’s appointment tomorrow morning to work out what next - hopefully IVF in November.

So much news to catch up on:

Congrats Ever and Wonky on the bpfs! Wonderful news! So pleased for you both!

Go wish - hope this cycle is your lucky one.

Oh Pickle - so beautiful!

Hugs to our other ladies starting treatment and making progress.

Let us know how you get on tomorrow london I am moving on to IVF as well (have consents on 20th Oct) hoping to start in Nov as well

Thanks all.
I ve booked my scan for next Thursday (will be 6+5). Still a bit early for my liking, but I am assured by the clinic that a HB will be seen by then!! Fingers xd.
Good luck with your appointment London

Ever good you have that booked now you can put to the corner of your mind and chillax

Things have gone a bit quiet on IVI front... will chase them on Monday if hear nothing until then...

Won’t be long now kwick I can’t remember how it works do they choose donor for you? Are you doing double donation or embryo?

How’s the weight loss going?

bear they match both donors to my physical characteristics and blood type and then take lady donor through IVF and do egg collection. I am having then test the match to rule out some genetic issues - this adds at least 20 days to the process.
My AF is due in the next few days so the earliest will be November but I think likely December. Which actually could work out well - work has to communicate any contract renewal by Feb so might be able to disguise that long if I am successful....

Weightloss do not think so good but do not actually know as have not been to SW in 2 weeks and cannot find scales 😬 definitely need to get back on track although I have certainly swum a lot this week.

Happy Friday everyone!!!

Definitely celebrating Friday! Best of luck to everyone with everything that's going on.

I've got a wait a couple more weeks until my next cycle then have to go on the pill until I've synced with the recipient of my eggs. It's taking ages! For no logical reason I can think of (prob just that I've got too much time to dwell) I've started to become really worried about the implantation procedure as I've heard you need a full bladder and as mine is teeny-weeny I am stressing about being kept waiting, how you judge full but not wet-yourself level etc

It's ridiculous as it's a such a minor thing to go through, and I'm not nervous about any of the other stuff like ultrasound wands going up there and injections. Those that have done it, what've your experiences been?

Happy Friday everyone! Not for me I’m afraid as come 8am tomorrow I start a 24hr on call. Yuck! Feeling tired all ready.

Am glad your test was good ever and all seems to be going as it should. Apparently you can get early scans from 6 weeks so even if you had late implantation 6+5 should be fine to see the heartbeat.

I can recommend an app called BabyCentre. I have been looking at it today and apparently I am now carrying a sesame seed sized baby that looks like a tadpole!

I was fairly desperate for a wee when I went in for transfer turtle especially with the nerves going crazy. They commented on how beautifully full my bladder was! Wasn’t kept waiting at all and procedure only took 5-10 minutes. However, I did have my transfer on a Sunday (day 2) and so the on call team had to come in and open the clinic just for me! I’m sure you will be fine though and hopefully they will keep to appointment times. Don’t stress too much about it, just keep sipping water until you are comfortably full. Do you have to be on the pill for a month and then they get the recipient to sync to you? Was also wondering if you find out if your recipient actually has a baby?

Thanks Wonky. Kinda concerned that comfortably full one moment becomes painfully desperate 5 mins later, especially if you've been taking on water deliberately, but like you say, I'm sure it will all work out fine.

Yes I have to be on the pill for min 3 weeks, slightly frustrating because of the extra delay it builds in - I thought my recipient would be the one to sync with my natural cycle which could have been happening this month!

I can find out if the recipient has a pregnancy/baby if I request it, but I don't need to ask. Think I'll wait to (hopefully) get a success myself first. After birth I think I can find out gender and birth date, but that's all, unless the child decides to look me up when they turn 18.

Good luck with your 24 hr on call - do you have to be at the hospital all that time?

Hopefully you will be able to keep it quiet until contract renewal kwick.

turtle the full bladder thing freaks me out too I constantly need to pee and can go from feeling fine to bursting in a matter of minutes so the thought of forcing that feeling on myself stresses me out. For my 1st 2 IUIs I didn’t think my bladder wasas full as it should have been but the 3rd I was bursting. I actually found the first 2 more comfortable and the nurse had more trouble with the catheter on the 3rd.

I downloaded baby centre for my sisters pregnancy wonky it’s great.

Thankfully don't have to be in the hospital all day as am feeling knackered. Am on with quite senior juniors (if that makes sense) and not too much going on so am planning on letting them get on with it and going home shortly. Obviously will need to rush back in if there are any difficult cases though. Fingers crossed for a good one.

🐢I have the same bladder issue - ai Know if I chug the water about 15 mins before I will be fine - why not practice to see how long it takes you? May make the tine pass faster

wonky how on earth do you stay awake for 24 hours and work?

Ever I completely understand about wanting to not get a scan too early - I had one at 6 weeks, nothing they coul really see, 7 weeks hearbeat, 8.5 weeks MC so stressful when they cannot see what they want, so sad when your worst nightmare is confirmed. I am sure you will be fine but best not to go too early if you can hold out.

wonky 🤞🏼

Yep Bear, kwick, good to know I'm not alone! I think I'll just get to the clinic early and have a drink then. Try and keep the control!

So 🐢🌳 let me tell you a story... once upon a time I was getting ready to have a scan (just routine, when I lived in Barcelona in the late 90’s) and the instructions were to drink about 1.5 litres of water about 1.5 hours before - which I duly did. Then I got a taxi to the clinic. ON THE WAY I had to make the taxi driver make an emergency stop so I could “let a little out”... I ran into a bar. Of course, it ALL came out! I hastily bought and downed more water. By the time I got to the clinic (about 10 minutes away) I had to do wee-wee again. I downed more water, my scan was delayed, AGONY, nearly weed on a nurse. The utter relief when I had an empty bladder again. The moral of this story: never ever will I fill bladder until I am at clinic with a toilet in my line of sight

Haha kwick I can just imagine! Why does it go through us so quickly??

I had something similar where I had to go for a scan and tried to drink what they suggested so early. Scan was then delayed about an hour and I was literally in the loo every 5 mins letting a little out but scared I'd let too much out and they'd cancel my scan. When I came get on the table I could barely bend and the nurse sent me away to 'go for ten seconds'. I was so embarrassed at how many times I went into the loo at the scan room.

So I will follow your advice and not go until I get to the clinic! I've learned now that water goes through me very quickly and drinking an hour in advance is very unnecessary!

Hi all . I am due to start my iui journey next year . So scared! I'm 36 in May , single. Given up on finding mr right. I have my own donor but he may change his mind . Also worried about how I will afford to be a single mum

Welcome 4leaf!

Welcome 4leaf good luck on this crazy journey. Do you have a timeline of when you'd like to get started?
I'm also worried about affording being a single mum but we will make it work
Gingerbread website for single families is a good place to start to see what is out there for support

Welcome 4leaf
Good to see new faces and you've certainly come to the right group for donor support 😚

Hi 4leaf. Definitely give some thought to your donor. I don't know whether you are planning on making it a formal arrangement but obviously there are legal implications that you need to consider.

Well my on call was actually quite good and I managed to get about 6 hours sleep. Thankfully most on calls we don't work for the whole 24 hours kwick. Normally work from 8am till 10pm and after that can often go home and get some sleep. Have to be ready to race in if there is a problem but overnight the rule is life, limb or testicle so if it's not going to kill you or mean you risk losing a limb or a testicle then the evidence suggests to is safer to do it during daylight hours when everyone functions better!

Have you heard from IVI yet Kwick?

Welcome 4leaf this is a great thread for help and advice. Do you know what your protocol will be yet or have you still to decide on a clinic?

Hi 4leaf - welcome! Everyone here is lovely and an absolute wealth of knowledge (which they are so generous in sharing!). On using a known-to-you donor, just one word of caution: our clinic mentioned that if we were using a private donor there would be a six month delay while their sperm was all checked out. We didn't look into it as we had already decided to go with US donor sperm from Xytex, but I do remember that point they made. Something for you to explore more, I guess, so you're really clear on timelines.

Thanks for the good wishes bear - how exciting to move onto IVF stage together. And thanks for your good luck Ever - how exciting that your scan is so soon!

So the appointment with the doctor went well - we are approved for IVF and will start this month! As I'm on the pill to reduce the size of the cyst that helpfully appeared last month, I can say with certainty that AF is likely to appear Weds or Thurs, so baseline scan will be the end of this week we think (13th?), and then we go onto the drugs.

I'm going to be on Gonal F, Cetrotide, HCG and Menopur, plus progesterone afterwards. The doc said most likely two weeks of drugs, then egg collection under sedation (27th?), then five days in the lab to create embryos, then putting back in (1st?), then tww (OTD 15th?).

Anyone got any tips to share about how you feel during the drug phase, at egg collection or after? The doc warned me about bloating from the drugs, which is so going to happen to me again on these monster amounts of drugs after the vile cramps and constipation of my last IUI round! In particular, do you think I'll need to take any time off work?

And I can feel my expectations rising again - which is so horrible. I know there's a bigger chance with IVF than IUI, and I know that most likely we'll get some frozen embryos too so future cycles if needed could be much less invasive, but still...

Thanks in advance for your insights, ladies. All hints, tips and experiences really welcomed. Promise I'll pay it forward by helping newbies on the thread when I'm an old hand at all this! xx

Hi London, great to hear you're good to go with ivf. I got lucky on my first try after 3 failed IUIs but I know what you mean by how your hopes are raised again. I was terrified of getting a BFN on my ivf cycle, I simply couldn't imagine how I could have broken the news to my parents that it had failed again. Fortunately it didn't and I now have a little one pushing my arms away from my belly while I type this message (she has clearly claimed my body her own 😁)

I was fine with the drugs (same protocol as you but only did 8 days of stims and collection on CD12). I was lucky enough that the last few days fell during the weekend as I was very bloated by then. I didn't have any other side effects from the injections. I worked from home the day before egg collection (had told work I needed a small intervention under general anaesthetics the following day and no questions were asked). EC was absolutely fine and I went home after a couple of hours (train+ walk). I worked from home the rest of the week as I didn't want to have to take the phone calls from the embryologist while at work or stress about it or anything. Embryo transfer is exactly the same as an IUI so you will know the trick by now. Mine was on Sunday and I went back to work as if nothing on Monday and resumed my normal trips between offices.

Hi everyone else, I regularly catch up on the thread and I'm loving the recent BFPs. Can't wait to see more coming!!!

Hi 4leaf, welcome to the thread.

Pez, thanks for sharing your experience. I am about a month behind London on timelines so keen to know what to expect. Does anyone else think Gonal F is a horrible name for a drug? Something about the name really makes me feel funny!

Glad you got some sleep Wonky. 8am to 10pm is still a really long day in my eyes. Much admiration.