#makeithappen TTC through Donor IUI or Donor IVF or just undecided. All welcome. Thread 7

[kwick]

This thread is for anyone trying to conceive... or thinking about doing so through donor IUI or donor IVF. Nothing TMI - feel free to join, we are a lovely group here to support and help keep the cray-cray away!

Here is the link to the previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2863056--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-Thread-6

Here is the link to the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2832207--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome
Here is the link to the one before that one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2769549-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen-loadsofBFPs
Here is the link to the thread before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2688511-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen
Here is the link to the one before that one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2587046-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome
And the one before that!: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1877198-Donor-IUI

In fact you only asked three questions but I'm a bit daft at the minute so counting to three is outside my current repertoire

Thanks Shoes I get practice of counting to 3 with my nephews!

I'm in no position to start this road for another 2 years at least - can eggs be frozen in preparation if I'm fat?

Also, I have really irregular periods so don't think I ovulate very often - is egg freezing worth exploring or should I not bother due to my age ?

shoes! you crack me up!

Welcome Lewis, it's probably worth finding a clinic you like or that's local and have a fertility assessment and then you'll know better what position your in and what options are suitable for you. Egg freezing may be an option and if you can't do actual getting up the duff for another 2years then def worth exploring. Good luck :)

Hoppy Easter Everyone! 🐰

I know Shoes, Hopeful & Pickle WTF was I thinking. It just looked so pretty sitting there After I had my little cry and a chat with a friend I pulled myself together & ended up having a good rest of the day. Thanks for the support ladies!

Now has anyone seen this report before? academic.oup.com/humrep/article/15/3/621/2915385/Intrauterine-donor-insemination-in-single-women

It's interesting reading although dated (94-96) Does anyone know of something more recent? Better stats than elsewhere but now I'm freaking out about miscarriage!

Karen glad you got a good heartbeat. Give yourself a break on the gardening, it will still be there when you have energy again (even if that is in about two year's time!). I've just cleared my balcony of all the things I've been totally neglecting for at least six months, probably more. It was quite interesting to discover what survives! There's a patch behind my flat which isn't mine but I also garden. I researched drought and shade tolerant plants and only planted them because it's a pain running a hose through the flat and then climbing out of the window to water.

Pez sorry the wait is hard! To be honest I think most women who haven't had problems/friends with problems probably blithely assume everything is ok. Which, statistically, is likely.

Happy birthday Snork!

Looks like another lovely walk Munro.

Phoenix I hope having a good cry helped. Did the old you do stuff or have interests that you never get around to now? You do sound hopeful to me - if you weren't you wouldn't be on here worrying. But I get the pessimism- what are you struggling to imagine working out?

Welcome Bunny and Lewis, good advice from everyone. Lewis, if your check up with a fertility clinic indicates that getting pregnant with IUI might be a challenge in two year's time, also explore the option of freezing embryos instead of eggs. They freeze better so you need far fewer of them and it means you know you've definitely got the beginnings of a baby - if you read back over this thread you'll see that even if a large number of eggs is collected, a smaller number will fertilise and even fewer will make it to 5 day blastocysts which can be frozen. Egg freezing has been in the news a lot but it's a much newer development than embryo freezing.

In terms of money and weight it depends how penniless and fat you are! If you go down the freezing route you are effectively doing the majority of an IVF cycle. For me two cycles of embryo freezing at the London Women's Clinic (who I would recommend) was getting on for 14K. If I had only wanted one child I would have stopped at one cycle, which would have been about 7K. I produce quite a lot of eggs - they won't be able to work out your likely response until they see you. Some clinics have a max BMI because you are sedated for the egg collection.

How was your night out Phoenix?

Interesting article Phoenix. The miscarriage rate is one of the reasons I had a second cycle of embryo freezing. Felt sorry for the woman who'd had 24 cycles.

Welcome Lewis! And hi everyone!

I had a bit of a restless night. For the past few nights I've had to get up a couple of times due to my bladder feeling really tight, it does hurt for a few minutes after I've emptied it but then everything seems to relax into place. Last night, however, I woke up with that same feeling just over an hour after I'd gone to sleep, walked to the bathroom, sat down and then got shooting pains in the bladder/pubic area and nothing coming out, like a really bad case of cystitis. It burnt so much I started breaking into a cold sweat and thought I was about to collapse in the bathroom so ran back to the bedroom. I barely managed to make it to my bed and for a few seconds lost my vision - all was black while my eyes were wide open, like when you get up too quickly and there's a temporary lack of oxygen to the brain (I think). It was so scary but luckily after I lied down again the pain stopped and didn't return.
I'm still not sure if this is within the 'normal' range of pain I could have at this stage - i read about round ligament pain and also the enlarging uterus intermittently compressing the urethra which can mimic the pain of a kidney stone passing (it was definitely of that intensity).

So now, I'm trying not to worry. I've managed to empty my bladder earlier this morning and all is back to normal...

If it happens again I'll check with my GP

Sorry for the long post, I just had to share it as still a bit shaken...

pez that sounds scary {hugs} you could maybe ring 111 or early pregnancy unit at hospital for advice? Epu maybe more knowledgeable? Xx

Yes, I think I'll call the epu at st Thomas this morning - Just to get some peace of mind

Pez - please call 111 now and see a doctor today.

If you could have a UTI I'm afraid you can't leave it until Tuesday to do something about it as if left untreated, infections in this area can affect pregnancy.

Sorry to worry you rather than reassure you but under the circumstances I think this is one of those times it's worth being cautious.

Cross-post. Good idea to phone EPU at St Thomas'.

Pez really glad you are phoning epu

Lewis I went with London women's clinic as other fertility clinics wouldn't treat me as said my bmi too high ( I hover around bmi of 35)

I started by going to lwc seminar to give me an idea of stuff. At presentation I got a voucher for money off the tests they do to check your fertility. I saw that as the first step that didn't commit me to anything but would let me know if any problems ( that was last October) after that I rang a few clinics up but stayed with lwc for weight reasons.

I have sone savings and saved for three goes and a little bit extra. Touch wood I'm still pregnant at moment after second attempt with iui so I have a bit of savings left over.

I think overall its cost me just under 5k for tests, sperm (£950 a pop with London sperm bank) and iui but I've not added up every penny exactly.

EPU told me to go to my local A&E so here I am, waiting and hoping with all my heart there is nothing serious.

Oh Pez big hugs - hopefully it is something that can be treated. I hope you don't have too long a wait. I know when they realised I was pregnant ( well I wasn't by then with the CP but they kept saying that) they kind of fast tracked me to another area eventually - hopefully they will do that for you so not waiting too long xxx

Hey pez. I had the EXACT same thing. Freaked me out. No uti. I think it was just my bladder pressing on my uterus. Then after the major pee everything settled back down. But it felt like major burning right after I went to the bathroom. I was in agony when I laid back down in bed. I still get it every now and then if I hold my pee too long during the night. Don't worry, you'll be fine. I'm glad you are checking things out anyway. X

Pez - I'm glad you're being seen. I hope it turns out to be nothing to worry about and that you don't have to wait for hours and can get on with your day.

Karen, I nearly cried when I read your message!! I hope it doesn't happen too often though as it's freaking scary
I was seen really quick (I feel bad for all the other people still waiting) and they ruled out any UTI. She checked my stomach and all is fine

Phew!

Oh pez so everything's ok? What a relief xxxx

Brilliant news Pez Glad everything's ok and that you didn't waste too much of the day waiting.

They couldn't tell me what causes it though. Most of the relief comes from the fact that Karen had the same thing happening to her ☺️ (not that I wish this happens to anyone else when pregnant as it's bloody painful)

Happy Easter Sunday everyone 🐣

Just glad your both ok 😊

pez I'm glad you are ok. Once I figured out the trigger I became pretty careful about not letting my bladder get too big. If I wake up during the night I make myself get up to pee. It's a terrible feeling. I thought trying to not drink during the night might help but every time I get up I also have a glass of water because I found I was getting dehydrated. Yes, you end up going to the bathroom a lot. But the more frequently I went the less chance I had of having that burning. It's good to rule out a uti though. My dr checks my urine at every appt. just keep drinking water! Sometimes I find it hard. I drink more at work than I do at home. So happy you have been seen and can go home knowing you are ok.

My allergies are killing me. Didn't really think about not being able to take allergy meds. Finally took. Tylenol because I've had a splitting headache. If that didn't work I was going to the hospital. But feeling better. The weather here got very warm very quickly so all the trees are exploding.

Happy Easter Sunday everyone! I'm going to give the dogs their new toys and have some hot cross buns. X

Sorry you've been feeling poop karen glad your doing a bit better
Hot cross buns sound the way forward :)