Husband Has Ended it - road to divorce

[itsovernow1]

Hi
I've had a thread in the Relationship section for a while, thought now we're actually heading for Divorce I'd post a new thread to update here.
All and any advice welcome.

Link to old thread [https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2814181-Husband-has-ended-it?pg=20] hopefully that worked!

I don't think she is coming back Mary. It makes me so cross - we were doing our best to support her and now she probably has no support at all.

Over - I haven't posted for a while but I always read this thread. Please, when you are ready, come back on here and talk to us again.

Hi over how are you. I hope your doing ok. Xx

I really hope you are okay. You have a lot of people here who care. Please don't be afraid of coming back. This is YOUR thread. Don't let one negative poster put you off from venting here. We are all behind you. X

@itsovernow1 I hope you are still reading even if you're not posting.

Hi, Over,

I've been thinking about you. Having read your posts for almost 2 years, I feel like I got some sense of you as a person. You wrote many times about valuing your anonymity here. But... the situation turned out to not be anonymity as you defined it.

Clearly you have a family who cares about you. But you're an extremely independent person. You didn't want to be indebted to your folks. My best hope is that you did end up having some sort of good dialogue with your sister, maybe broke the ice? But I do know how complicated sibling relationships can be...

One of the things most people try to do here is reserve judgment. We're not in a position to diagnose anyone here, not even professionals can do that in this situation. It's just a forum, albeit a very good one. All we can do is offer our own experience and support.

Here's one thing I know: don't ever tell a severely depressed person they are a martyr. Was it helpful? Um, no. My heart sank when I read someone say that to you.

Like I said, I read your posts for about 2 years. Nothing you wrote ever gave any hint of you feeling sorry for yourself. And you have every right to talk about your feelings, all of them, happy or sad. I hope you know that.

Such a shame that you've been effectively chased off your long running thread. I've never commented but have lurked and wished you well.
Hope all is ok.

Just one last message before I delete this from my watched threads - I am still here if you want to PM me Over.

I am deleting it from my watched threads because it makes me too sad to see it there - this was Over's second thread and we were supporting as best we could, until someone knew better and then everything went wrong. I am still thinking about you Over and wishing you well from where I am.

I feel the same as kaitlin. I have followed your threads from the beginning and posted frequently (under a previous user name) and I genuinely wish you all the best for the future over. I hope you are ok.

I have to agree, I find this very sad and have to let go of this thread. But I think of you often, Over, and since I'm a praying kind of person, I keep you in my prayers.

I did wonder if this situation was in part the handiwork of someone pretending to be an innocent bystander, just offering "helpful" advice to you ... as the "helpful" advice seemed designed to push exactly the right buttons to get you terribly upset.

Or maybe I find it hard to contemplate the damage some random can do on the internet without hardly trying. Either, way, sad.

On the other hand, you experienced the kindness of strangers reaching out to you, which was heartening to see. That's the up side of the internet, I imagine. But it is also a credit to you, yourself, that you wrote with such clarity that we felt we could understand you, at least in some small part.

Wherever you are, whatever you are doing, I hope you give yourself credit for all the good that you are.

Mrs.P

I really hope you are okay. Please come back and update us. You've been an inspiration to a lot of people. X

If you have doubts about continuing the relationship. then the relationship needs to end. When the spouses have normal relations, thoughts about divorce and separation do not arise at all. New relationships are better than old ones. So my advice is onlinedivorcewa.com

Zombie Thread. OP was chased off over a year ago by a self-righteous buttinsky who wanted to play amateur Therapist from 1000's of Miles away in a Australia. Here's hoping the OP had a better 2019/2020.

Hope she has too, often think & worry about her.

Hello itsover. I don't know why but I was thinking about you the other day and wondering how you are? I hope things have got better for you and you are well.