Had a Spendy Summer? Join the Friendly Frugaleers as we Segue Smoothly into a Sensible September

[LivingInLaputa]

All welcome. Couldn’t see another thread!

No real update on my dad from his appointment. My mum is showing big signs of being overwhelmed by it all. They’ve got someone coming round from dementia support tomorrow, so i’ve managed to get some time off to be there . But he sounds like most of the time now (instead of occasions) he doesn’t know who my mum is, which is a rapid decline within a few days

Very wise happier. That house just was not meant to be

Love I’m sorry to hear that. Good that you can be there for them

Em seriously dh needs to get a grip. Hope he gets better soon just so he doesn’t bother you!

Absolutely shit day at work. I am so sick of aggro men speaking to me like I am shit and team members refusing to do things because they are “busy” when they are clearly anything but. Grrrrr

Happier sorry about the house

That's not great love. Hope you can get some support sorted.

Grrr indeed wolf.

LSD today £3.50 bacon breakfast

Nsd today - just need about another fourteen to survive until payday 🙄

Love I’m sorry to hear about your dad and hope you all get the support you need I take it they’ve ruled out any infections that could account for the sudden increase in his confusion?

em I am feeling a bit sorry for myself too as I have a stinking cold so I have a little bit of sympathy for your dh I hope you don’t catch it. Maybe put him in quarantine

Sea your almost all nighters make me tired just thinking about them. I know I couldn’t cope with that little sleep. In total awe that you do and still manage to do lovely home cooking and baking. Puts me to shame What’s that saying - if you want something done just ask a busy woman.

Happier hard lines on the house, but I’m sure something else will come along

I do have sympathy for dh. He is really suffering. It’s not like him to take the day for a cold so he must be feeling really rough.

He’s made dinner - spaghetti bolognaise (with enough leftover for at least 4 freezer portions) and has given Dd her emergency bath (because his nose isn’t blocked he’s done all the poop nappies today...!)

Picked Ds up from nursery. He didn’t sleep at all today. Having too much fun!! So he’s knackered. And now not sleeping. He’s hit the overtired mark and is singing to himself in his cot.

Catface just chased a butterfly and ate it and is now scratching around under the new dresser. Living room door to garden has been open all day.

Love that sounds really difficult with your mum and dad, have the Drs ruled out physical causes of the confusion? I wonder if he might need admission to give your mum a break and to get his needs fully assessed?

I don't know how you cope on so little sleep either sea I'd be hallucinating on 3 hours kip!! I'm struggling on 8 hours at the moment thanks to the puppy 😬 I'm a 9-10 hours of sleep a night girl!!

Sorry to hear about the house happier but yes these things are meant to be. Glad things are working out with your new fella.

Em I'd have no sympathy either, sounds like man flu 😉

I'm so tired today, feel a bit fed up for no particular reason.

It's been a NSD though.

9-10 hours sounds like bliss. Hell 8 hours straight is a dream at present! b

I was kind of hoping today’s appointment would result in an admission girlie but it was a day unit place. He’s got dementia support coming tomorrow, psychiatrist nurse next week and my mum says the doctor today has ordered more blood tests. He may have had a scan today but she can’t remember . I don’t find out much useful from her to be honest but she did take their sensible friend with them today who went in with them.

I just don’t really know what to do to help. I can’t go to every appointment as I work in a school so don’t get normal annual leave. If I give up work, by the time i’ve done my notice period, it might be beyond my help that they need.

*psychiatric

I think i’m going to have to try and get more time off work unpaid though. I can’t really see any other way, and you only have one set of parents

Would they give you carers leave Love?

Would your dr sign you off Love? When my dd was really poorly and I needed time off the Dr signed me off with stress caused my family circumstances or something along those lines. I think if your dad becomes aggressive or his behaviour worsens your mum needs to ring the paramedics and insist they take him in.

Love- that sounds a really hard situation 😞 I hope you can manage some time off

£5 tea and cake
£15 diesel
£10 electric top up
£27 birthday present
£10 padlock for DS2 locker
£28 life insurance.

Severely over budget

Love being signed off might be the simplest route for leave tbh. Is there anyone at work you can speak to about what is going on and see what options they can think of for you to take more leave? It must be so hard, I'm so sorry.

Yes idk how Sea does it either. I also am a 9-10 hours a night gal like Girlie but unfortunately despite DD being a decent sleeper, I haven't had a proper good sleep since about midway through my pregnancy. Before she was born her kicking, my anxiety, and pee trips kept me awake at night and then even when she sleeps great now she still makes loads of noises in her sleep which wakes me and her and DH both snore. We are all in the same room and honestly I often feel like I should just sleep in the spare bedroom because I am up so much in the night whilst the other two sleep soundly and it drives me mad!!

Today's spends was just my train fare to work as had to go to a different office which took me around 2hrs 20 mins each way door-to-door and train cost me about £12. Tomorrow hopefully only spend will be my £2.30 bus fare to work fingers crossed. Tbh I can't actually have an NSD ever anymore I think really unless the days when I work from home but I often buy groceries on my lunch break then. Because really I'm aiming not to spend anything but my bus fare on most my work days but can't get around that spend lol.

Do it Meadow, sleep in the spare room, at least occasionally!

Love that’s so hard, I’m sorry. Agree with the others about leave - do what you gotta do. You are right, you only have one lot of parents. Take care of yourself too.

I have just finished for the night and am going to bed. Thanks for the support everyone - I’m not a superwoman, just have no choice! Gotta work, gotta have a high paying job (= Stress) and now I have to work it around the family it eats into my sleep. I am having to catch up a lot right now after taking lots of time off over the school Holidays, it can’t be helped. I am knackered though. Up again in 3.5 hours and right now I feel too wired to sleep! AF also appeared today, most unwelcome. Night night

Do it meadow we did that when I was pregnant and are still in separate rooms actually. I do night feed sun - thurs. Dh does fri and sat nights so I can get a decent uninterrupted sleep.

Busy day today. Vet then gone to drop catface off then brunch then dentists to get my nighttime retainers and whitening stuff. Yay.

WreckCat also has the vets later. It's so hard getting an 8kg cat into a basket I'm not looking forward to it.

Meadow def sleep in the spare room.

Sea that all sounds so tough be careful you don't end up making yourself ill

Love I teach and I often worry about being in your situation - just what on earth do we do when we need sporadic time off? I think talk to your school (they may be more flexible than you think), otherwise your GP.

As we approach the mid-September mark I'm feeling cautiously optimistic about money this month. By mid-August we were completely spent out but now we have money in the bank and if we stick to the budget we made, might even have a tiny amount left over (might only be £1 but would be the first time in around 5 months that we're in the black by month end)!

Meadow are you planning to put dd in her own room at some point? I put dd in her own room at 6 months purely so we'd both get more sleep.

Puppy slept 8.5 hours last night so is def getting better at going long stretches. It's my day off today, plan is to catch up on life admin and maybe get out in the garden as it's looking a mess atm.

Working term time is great but it's a pain when you need time off. I've got to make up the hour for ds' blood test the other day but unless I pay £11 for an hour of childcare I'm not sure how I can do it or what the point is when at the moment I'm literally sitting in the office doing nothing because none of my paperwork is ready

I know I should and DH tells me to! I just really prefer to sleep with him but then I get resentful in the middle of the night whilst he's sleeping soundly and I'm tossing and turning and fuming about his snoring lol. So I know I am BU and need to sleep in the spare room at least sometimes...

DD got it coming out of both ends this moening not envy. I had to get DH to come back to look after her but he was only about 30 mins away. I did ask my DM first but didn't know if that was cheeky? She said no which I thought she might as she really struggles with vomit which is fine but idk if I was BU to even ask.

Spends today should just be £2.30 on my bus to work.

Good luck kitties at the vet.

Meadow you were not unreasonable to ask and she was not unreasonable to say no so all is well

love hope you manage to see a way through helping your parents. A customer came in here yesterday and I commented that I hadn't heard from him in a while, he took 3 years off work to care for his 89 year old father until he passed away, I thought that was an amazing thing to be able to do and told him so.

madden that kind of thing happens to me/us first week of the month as that's when all the standing orders go out. Sometimes I've to move money from savings just to move it back again days later, usually that's because h hasn't transferred his money on time. Thankfully having a joint mortgage is coming to an end - signed paperwork to release deeds of house yesterday.

I know I'll be watching the bank account for maintenance but hopefully not relying on it as much.

em has it affected your marriage do you think? Some people do this quite successfully, in our marriage being in the spare room meant he was in a huff/temper with me

meadow being exhausted will make your commute harder too, definitely get a few nights in the spare room let the snorers sleep together