The Mighty Frugaleers Meticulously March into March

[WreckTangled]

New thread. Sorry for lame title

Have just spent £16 in wool warehouse on 6 balls of yarn that I think most closely match my new blue shoes. I need to see them to get the best match before I order enough for a cardi. Always get 10% off (code sc33), but this is the first time I have had to pay postage, I always spend over £25. It us a ver posh christening, and I need to feel good confident . Hence shoes, will make a dress, and knit a smart short cardi. I have the horror of wearing the same outfit as someone else, and looking dreadful in comparison, so always make something individual for this thankfully rare sort of thing.

The older I get, the more I realise that I have been managing a reasonable level of anxiety for as long as I can remember

for you polka if you've hashed and rehashed this issue, it might not be something you can get round. It will do you no good to feel crap forever. I hope you can sort it out soon, his punishment (the silence) has not been at all good for you, don't settle for being punished. Saying that, it took me two years (and two more babies) to let go of my crap relationship, where I got punished for not much, and he was unfaithful, which was also my fault, apparently... so I might not be the best for advice!

cag so pleased your dsd got her money sorted, it must be a relief for you. Rest up this weekend.

Can hear Dh saying to the dc 'go to sleep or I'm going to get mummy' guess which one of us is bad cop?!

Ended up a nsd as managed the top up shop on under £10 and that's what I had on the tesco gift card so all good.

My kitchen is all clean and tidy which makes me happy. I hate a messy kitchen. When Dh clears away everything after dinner he never wipes the sides down and it drives me mad.

Oh I couldn't cope with thst, Wreck. If you're going to do a job, you do it well, in my view. No matter how exhausted or ill I am, the washing up and the kitchen surfaces get done at least once a day.

Mine never wipes either Wreck it drives me mad too!

Same creme. I do it in the morning once breakfast is over and then again after dinner. If we are home it gets done after lunch too! I also Hoover at least once a day downstairs if I'm home. Dh wouldn't even consider doing these things so frequently.

Now hoovering I can take or leave, although with no pets, 1 teenager and no shoes inside the house, it's easy enough to manage. But I don't understand how (mostly) men can sit down or go to bed, leaving a kitchen in mess. The last time I didn't wash up before bed was my birthday in February last year, when I had a heavy cold and laryngitis and was just too exhausted after work and a meal out afterwards.

Nsd and made it to the gym as my ass and tum are spreading

Polka it's his issue now not yours. Well done for gaining insight into your condition. Good luck with the journey and meds.

Happy baking knitting

I have read but have not made notes so forgotten, sorry

Polka. My DH is bi-polar, I feel it's important to say it is diagnosed as well, so not self assumed or anything, self diagnosis pisses me off. He medicates now, but didn't for many years, those years were hard. I get what you say about the lows and the highs, DH used to say he quite enjoyed the highs, as he feels or felt invincible. During the lows, it would be hard to make him get out of bed, never mind run a company.

I don't know how I would feel if DH had been unfaithful, regardless of whether he had been ill at the time. I'm not sure if I could get past it. The rational side of me would say it was the illness, my heart would struggle in truth. He once accused me of being unfaithful when he was in a paranoid phase and that still hurts today.

Your BF isn't supporting your illness though and not helping you, and your illness doesn't mean you shouldn't still be treated with respect. But maybe he's struggling to deal with seeing the other guy?

My anger towards with DH relates towards how long it took him to accept medical help. I feel we went at least 4/5 years through a nightmare that we didn't need to. But that's irrational, as you can only accept help when you are ready.

Watching live well and spend less (or what ever its called ) and have already shouted at the telly more than once!! People are so ridiculous, a mechanic and beautician living like millionaires

I have to leave the kitchen tidy before bed as well and surely wiping the surfaces is obvious?! I also end up hoovering pretty much daily, two cats though!

Cheers creme I do agree, it feels like a massive step backwards but yup no point in having savings when the money would be better spent to save money overall (interest etc)

Seacow :o love the digestive crumb story, I thought my mum was the best person in the world during my first labour as she was the one with the digestives! Move over DH 😂

I started watching it, Girlie, but that woman was just so silly and annoying, I had to turn over. Half-watching a programme on BBC 4 about canals now...

The only thing dh cleans is the kitchen. But never the floor.

He won't Hoover - he used to but the agreement (apparently) was that if we got catface I'd Hoover all the time to try and contain her fur. I don't Hoover all the time. twice a week at most. I hate cleaning. Keep thinking we should get a cleaner.

Have worked out that dh is the messy one. I've corralled all of his stuff and shoved it in a drawer. That was last Sunday. The house has been clutter free.

Just eaten my body weight in curry with dm and ddad. Homemade at their house. Yay!!

Dh has started his journey home. Queenstown to Auckland. Then a few hours wait in Auckland. Then to hk then to London then finally a flight from Gatwick at 1.15 on Saturday afternoon.

Good for you for getting the diagnosis I meant to say Polka It's such a serious issue. xx

North Doesn't feeling fit and healthy become a positive vicious cycle iyswim? You feel fitter therefore you want to eat well. You eat well, so you want to getting fitter!

DS's parent's evening was good on the whole, Physics being the only subject where he isn't pulling his weight. He's not good at knuckling down when he finds things tough.

It does need I've fought with my weight/body image for most of my life but have never felt more positive. I'm not looking for a quick fix and not denying myself anything either, but like you say, exercise motivates me to make better choices. This is for life

Healthy choices for life indeed.

I keep banging on to my DC about this North

Been busy all day. Skip came this morning for all the bathroom related rubbish. So I have finally finished ( well except for 1 shower screen that has to be made to measure).
I now have a working cloakroom, a bathroom, an ensuite shower room and another ensuite shower room on the top floor (which I can't yet use because of missing screen)
But I love it. All work well. All are clean and modern. All are paid for.
And I would never have saved all the money for them if I had not had the support of all the people on here. So thank you all.
Now, saving for posh greenhouse. Garden needs clearing and tree stumps grinding up to clear ground.

polka keep going on your current path and I know you will do great

Left home 6.20am, back at 7.45pm. Done in, so although I have read the thread, just too tired to remember much

Lovely walk by the Thames this morning. Course was mind bogglingly confusing

Polka, I meant to say. You are doing so well. And you are ill.
Don't let him bully you with his silence. You are worth more than that.
Meadow, hope you feel better. You do seem to have a bad time of it.
Both of you look after yourselves.

Need

Thank you for that 😊

Yes the highs were/are easier, until you realise what you've done. You're so productive, everything is great, you're invincible and just so wired and untouchable.

I understand completely how he would be upset and that what I did was horrendous. I have really made that clear to him, I am ashamed and would never repeat it. I understand how seeing him would put him back there, trying to cope with me, my behaviour, I was so not me. I was rude, uncaring, just a total nightmare for him. This incident was roughly in the middle of the high that lasted quite a while. I actually started hallucinating, it was awful. The highs are so hard for people on the outside and easy for us. The lows are almost the other way round; I'm just in bed in a catatonic state, not taking cocaine and piercing myself and staying out all night and spending every penny.

Although I really feel that if he can't see past it, we shouldn't be together and accept I ruined it. I feel I can't have this punishment over and over, despite the awful thing I did.

He has been really great about it all, helping me face up to it and making sure I'm medicated and always happy to discuss my mood or make me see when I'm not being 'me'. He's supported me in getting talking therapy and being great about it, not at all intrusive, just the right amount.

I would be devastated if he cheated on me and there's very very little that would make it ok. I understand that he feels the same and I don't expect him to think 'oh she was Poorly never mind' because that's just horrendous. I do however want him to remember that time and the state of me, to go some way toward fixing this, along with my very obvious regret and sincere dedication to him.

I get more lows than highs, if that helps. So any high is even stranger for me.

new thread

polka sounds like you are doing brilliantly xx

polka I agree with the others. You're doing amazingly well. X x