Am I going to die :(

[Iwannabelikeyouohh]

My husband has just had a positive LFT.

I’m absolutely petrified. I’m extremely obese with a BMI of 40.

I am fully vaccinated but I have had two different vaccines. 1 AZ and 1 Pfizer.

I feel physically sick with worry. 😓

[quote Iwannabelikeyouohh]@hopeishere

I think my weight makes me worry more, but if I was magically a size 10, I don’t think my fear of Covid would go.

My BIL is a healthy weight, young, no health problems. He’s been the one who’s been most unwell with Covid.

Covid is unpredictable and everyone reacts differently.

Just because I lose weight doesn’t mean my risk will magically disappear, and just because I’m fat
Doesn’t mean I’m automatically going to be severely ill.
This week has made me really think about this.

Covid is just a life long fear for me now[/quote]
Your fear might not magically go.

But I can promise you I'm a hell of a lot less worried about it with a BMI of 24 than I was with a BMI of 40.

Plus if you're this worried about Covid then surely cancer, stroke and all the other obesity risks are much more worrying. As they're all much more likely to kill you.

@Iwannabelikeyouohh

I just honestly don’t understand why others aren’t as scared as I am am. Pretty sure everyone was last year!

Also BiL is vaccines, he’s had one vaccine.

I have lost weight this week. I’m also going to a weight loss group on Thursday night.

I wasn't afraid, I never have been. No one at all that I know has been afraid at any point. I'm CEV. Very CEV if I was to actually follow all the guidance I was given. I didn't want to shield so I didn't. I got covid. I've just had a cold that was worse than the symptoms I got with covid. When my DH and I had covid he was more unwell than me (although it was mild for us both).

You're this afraid because of your anxiety. Not because you need to be afraid of covid for the rest of your life. Your anxiety is doing the talking which is why going round and round on here, whether you think it helps or not, doesn't actually help. As it's allowing you to pick and choose what you take on board (which you definitely do, as others have pointed out), and you then spiral further into your anxiety.

You refuse to accept that there are other things that you could do to get help, or other things you could try.

It's all your anxiety that does this, yet you, as a result of your mental health issues, do end up believing it's covid, and everyone felt this way at se point.

Most people really did not ever feel this way and you do need more and different help.

Oh OP, I've been following your thread and I totally understand. I feel the same. I'm terrified of it taking me or my husband (both high risk) or both of us. We have no siblings and two DDs under five. The stress is really upsetting me. My oldest is in school and the risk just seems so high but she needs an education. All four of us have asthma so I just worry how we'd cope. I also had the AZ jab which is now known to be less effective.

Also so many bugs coming home from school/nursery and we're all feeling off colour and have done so many PCRs.

It's just so much to cope with. I can't imagine living like this forever either.

But OP if you've had it in your house for so long and managed to dodge it you probably are immune or had it without symptoms! Did you get an antibody test done? Might reassure you?

@Iwannabelikeyouohh

I just honestly don’t understand why others aren’t as scared as I am am. Pretty sure everyone was last year!

Also BiL is vaccines, he’s had one vaccine.

I have lost weight this week. I’m also going to a weight loss group on Thursday night.

I'm really glad, exercise really does boost your mood and you need that. 20 minutes in woodland is meant to work wonders so do that if you can. Good for you for going to a weight loss group. I don't think your weight is the underlying cause of your anxiety, but it's a big contributor.

I do know lots of people who never had covid.
Bit less these days granted.
All we can do is stay optimistic.
Try and distance, wear masks, get vaccinated.
Hope you feel less anxious soon op.
Don't think the media helps

@YukoandHiro

But OP if you've had it in your house for so long and managed to dodge it you probably are immune or had it without symptoms! Did you get an antibody test done? Might reassure you?

@YukoandHiro

But I’ve read loads of threads this past week where people have said they haven’t caught it when there’s Covid in their household, we can’t all be immune!!

Maybe just a coincidence this time.

In Feb 2020 just before I had my son, I did feel unwell for a few days. Awful headache and high temperature. I was admitted to hospital as I was pregnant and couldn’t get my temp down.

They kept me in for a few nights and gave me antibiotics. They never knew what it was but told me my CRP levels were elevated.

I always do wonder if that was Covid, but it was well before it was probably a “thing” so I highly doubt it.

I’ve never had an antibody test and I don’t see the point now as I’ve been vaccinated so would test positive for antibodies from the vaccine.

Just try and think positive now OP. You've made it through the household having it which is a crowd t to the vaccine or your own immune system.
You could've had symptomless Covid at any point, but regardless you have got through this rough patch.
There's a lot to question about our own genetics and blood work etc as to why some people don't seem to catch the virus, sounds like you've been a lucky one :)
Now try and out this behind you and move on!

@Iwannabelikeyouohh and yet ONS estimates that over 90% of the adult population have antibodies, so why not?

@november90

I’m grateful I haven’t caught it this time but it doesn’t mean I won’t catch it.

It also doesn't mean that you haven't already had it so have antibodies which I think is more likely!
Hope you're family are well!

[quote Iwannabelikeyouohh]@november90

I’m grateful I haven’t caught it this time but it doesn’t mean I won’t catch it.[/quote]
I mean it pretty much does mean you won't

You can test for n protein antibodies which indicate natural infection and not vaccine antibodies as they are to the spike protein. Given it was fev2020 though they may be negative by now anyway so not very helpful if negative.

@makelovenotpetrol

I mean it pretty much does mean you won't

No… it doesn’t.

I have a colleague who didn’t get it when her husband got it, but caught it from the pub 8 weeks later!!

[quote Iwannabelikeyouohh]@makelovenotpetrol

I mean it pretty much does mean you won't

No… it doesn’t.

I have a colleague who didn’t get it when her husband got it, but caught it from the pub 8 weeks later!![/quote]
That's one person.
And you're catastrophising. Hope you're appointment went well today.

Some people can never be reassured.

Yeah I agree op, not catching it now doesn't mean you won't eventually. Well any of us. Mt friend from unis husband had it pre vaccines, she didn't catch it then. She has caught it at work this week and has been poorly despite being double jabbed. I think that is to do with the difference between alpha and delta though.

I'm glad you've escaped this op. The mixed vaccine is definitely a blessing so I think it's safe to say your vaccine worked. Have you had the booster?

One positive is your dh,ds and wider family should now have pretty good immunity for a while so shouldn't bring it home again any time soon x

Op are you in any medication for your anxiety? I ask because I was where you are last year. I honestly thought I would get covid and die. I had a breakdown over it and it took months to recover. I was prescribed propanonal for the panic attacks and citalopram for the anxiety. I had a lot of therapy but the medication has worked wonders. I have always been anxious but managed to control it. The pandemic was a massive trigger for me.

Thankfully it worked as I am a teacher and I couldn’t imagine at the time how I would ever be able to work again. I’m very sensible wearing a mask, hand sanitising and social distancing. I still wouldn’t go to a concert but I feel generally comfortable with it now.

My ds and Dh also got it. Two of my other children and myself didn’t catch it. I have also been notified by track and trace numerous times because a friend has caught it. Thankfully so far I have not had it. I am so thankful for the vaccines. I also am obese. I was a bmi of 56 when the pandemic started and am now 42 so I know how it feels to worry that weight will make it worse.

Have you tried any meditation or anything? What about journaling your thoughts and concentrating on self care. Whatever you can do to help ease your worries. Please please ask your doctor for extra help.

I’ve spoken to my GP again this morning.

I can’t go on like this. She’s writing to secondary mental health and requesting I have a change in treatment. The psychologist I’m seeing just isn’t making a difference.

She also wants me to have some bloods and an ECG. I think it’s because she asked me about physical symptoms and I mentioned palpitations.

She doesn’t want to make any changes to medication right now. I am anxious already about being on meds because of breastfeeding so she doesn’t want to make any more changes.

I just want to get better. I want to wake up feeling happy and interested in the day.

I hate what Covid has done. I hate this pandemic.
I wish it would just go away 😔

Never mind bloods and an ECG. Stay away from the media and this board. Start helping yourself.

@Babybellblue

I am helping myself. I’ve tried so hard for help.

The help you need is to stay away from media articles that increase your anxiety. You need to look at your behaviour. No blood test will help you with that.

@Babybellblue

Perhaps you’ve misunderstood? I haven’t asked for a blood test. That’s nothing to do with me or my worries.
The GP has told me she wants me to have one!

I don’t read the news. I know enough about Covid already

Bit much maybe BabyBellBlue?

Yes possibly I am coming across as harsh. However this poster has made so many threads over the last 18months it's probably close to 100. Everyone has tried to help her but it's all fallen on deaf ears.
So many posters have tried to help her.

You mentioned on another thread you were up at 2am scouring for articles on covid. I think you have made so many threads you are forgetting what you have said.

I sincerely hope you live a happier life one day.