Would you take your elderly mum to Sainsbury's

[Icequeen01]

So I'm in such a quandary about this. My DM who is 81 has had both her jabs. She hasn't been out for weeks and weeks and I do her shopping each week when I do mine. She has told me she is coming with me to Sainsbury's next week as it will then be over a week since her booster. She knows she has to wear a mask, hand sanitise and socially distance etc.

I'm still not comfortable with taking her though. I've explained that they don't know if she can still transmit the virus but this is something she desperately wants to do, just to have a little bit of normality again and to be able to do her own shopping. She was very upset when I suggested she shouldn't come.

What would you do?

@Handcarthell

And the rest of us she passes it on to that haven't had it can just suck it up!?

She’s no more likely to pass it on than anyone else shopping in Sainsbury’s. Unless she’s given to snogging random strangers ...

I would. My dad is elderly and not in the best of health. The only time he has left the house is to go to morrissons (in the summer when no lock downs/shielding and it made his day.
As soon as he has his jabs I won't hesitate to let him go.

I really wouldn’t, it’s just not worth the risk as she can still contract the virus, the vaccine reduces the risk of serious illness. At her age though you just don’t want to take the chance. I caught covid from the supermarket.

Plus as others have said it’s not a social outing, can you go for a wee walk with her if she just wants to get out the house?

I just don't know how to explain it any more simply

Stay at home if you can.

No go for a walk instead maybe window shopping

It's her choice. I would respect her decision.

Yep, no question

If I did take her, I'd make sure it's at the quietest time though.

No..soz but she could still transmit....hold on for a few months...not worth it for Sainsbury's

Apparently the vaccine isn't at full effectiveness for 21 days.

Shopping is essential. You can have someone do it for you, have it delivered or you can go to Sainsbury's!!! Most grown adults can make this decision on which they do without going against any guidelines or being called a granny murdering granny. What is different about the OPs mother?

What part of only one adult glong shopping do people not understand?

If I'd posted about wanting to take my 18 year old to the supermarket for a trip out what would the reply have been?

There are plenty of 80+ year olds still doing their own shopping, it is not against the rules.

Could you take her and then wait in the car while she does her shopping? If she needs help to do the shopping then that is a legitimate reason for you both to go in together.

@MrsMiaWallis

Apparently the vaccine isn't at full effectiveness for 21 days.

Untrue.

Pfizer said the late-stage trial found its shot was about 52% effective after the first dose, with study results showing protection starting as early as 12 days after receiving it. A week after the second dose, the shot's effectiveness rose to 95%

No unfortunately not, although your Mum is now potentially protected there as yet is no confirmation whether she can still act as a vector for the virus. Everyone is still following the rules to reduce transmission for everyone. Sorry it’s awful for young and old alike.

@MrsMiaWallis It's is 3 weeks for the first jab (which she had in 18th December). She had her second one on 11th January and it states 7 days for the second. IF she went to Sainsbury's it would be almost 2 weeks after her 2nd one.

A spokeswoman for Sainsbury’s added guidance remained “shop alone if you can” and customers with children or carers would not be refused entry

So will you lie and say you are your mum's carer?

Absolutely, yes I would. I would never deny an elderly person the right to live freely in the world. That is what she wishes to do and the law says she can. She’s a free person

Then she can go by herself!

fucking hell. Really? She is eighty fucking one. How bloody nasty

@Doobydoo

No..soz but she could still transmit....hold on for a few months...not worth it for Sainsbury's

Any of us could transmit without knowing it! If OPs mum has not been out for weeks she is less likely than a lot of shoppers to transmit?

@VinylDetective I did ask that myself what the point is. So I'll have my vaccine and... still shielding

Yes. Definitely. It's been months. If she's had a vaccine she has more protection than most. As for not knowing if she can pass it on it goes for everyone in the shop.

@charliespie

Absolutely, yes I would. I would never deny an elderly person the right to live freely in the world. That is what she wishes to do and the law says she can. She’s a free person

Then she can go by herself!

fucking hell. Really? She is eighty fucking one. How bloody nasty

Oh behave. I know plenty of 80 year olds who go to the shops by themselves, even though they shouldn't really

@Flowersandtea

No unfortunately not, although your Mum is now potentially protected there as yet is no confirmation whether she can still act as a vector for the virus. Everyone is still following the rules to reduce transmission for everyone. Sorry it’s awful for young and old alike.

But there are no rules about 80+ people going shopping?

The op has already said they don't shop together. More froth than a cappuccino in a blender here.

I would take my elderly mother out to the shops 3 weeks after her first dose, because no one has become seriously ill 3 weeks after the first dose of vaccine. Her mental health is important too.