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There is nothing in my children’s lives

708 replies

Howdydooo · 05/01/2021 01:01

It’s all been taken away again.

I know it’s a pandemic. I know it’s temporary (but don’t know how temporary).

Screens are no substitute for friends.

They will not be fooled again by home structure and schooling. They have nowhere to go, no one to see and nowhere to go. And they know how long it went on for last time.

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Howdydooo · 05/01/2021 01:03

They have nothing to do.

It will no longer be possible to motivate them to exercise or study.

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yawnsvillex · 05/01/2021 01:03

I feel the same. Sad

hopingforonlychild · 05/01/2021 01:04

I was 11 during the SARS pandemic in a country which had to shut schools. I know its nothing compared to now, but I don't really remember that time of my life really well. And it was a year before major end of primary school exams. I am 28 this year.

I hope your kids would be similar.

foxredlab · 05/01/2021 01:08

Sorry you are feeling so low @Howdydooo how old are your kids, maybe someone will have ideas?

My kids are early primary but have each other and me and DH. Their world has shrunk but for the most part I think it will be us adults who struggle most as I think kids tend to adapt really well.

Im not saying it's not shit, it is but I honestly don't think they'll feel it as bitterly

Howdydooo · 05/01/2021 01:11

Thank you for replies

Mine are older than that and are well aware of everything unfortunately

They are unfortunately voicing how bitterly they feel it and referring back to the last big lockdown

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FlappingFanny · 05/01/2021 01:11

Hey OP, how old are your dc? I've recently set my dd up so she can game with her friends over FaceTime. She's really enjoyed seeing her friends and playing with them... just an idea that maybe your kiddies can do with their friends... screens are definitely no substitute for friends but it seems that socialising over facetime is the best of a bad situation right now

Elephant4 · 05/01/2021 01:12

It’s harder for Secondary aged kids.

Mine are suffering more than me. They will remember this.

Howdydooo · 05/01/2021 01:13

Thank you.

I’ll figure something out

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Howdydooo · 05/01/2021 01:14

@Elephant4 same here. I am not suffering other than through watching my kids suffer

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Elephant4 · 05/01/2021 01:14

Yes. It’s worse this time because they know what to expect. They don’t believe Boris’ bullshit either.

It’s all very depressing for everyone.

0gfhty · 05/01/2021 01:18

I think It's absolutely devastating. Screens are not even a close substitution. This period of restricted socialising depending on where you live has gone on for almost a year, the effects on the young will not be temporary. It's terrible and it's so hard to be happy and to be your childrens world 24/7.

Howdydooo · 05/01/2021 01:21

@0gfhty

Totally agree, this is appalling. The first major national lockdown was bad enough but this is going to do long term mental damage to a huge proportion of children

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Elephant4 · 05/01/2021 01:24

I’m trying really hard to minimise the damage to my own dc OP.

Do you have any tips? Does anyone? It feels like we’ve been abandoned in this.

Like you say I’m suffering because my kids are. How do we lessen the impact of this?

Howdydooo · 05/01/2021 01:28

@Elephant4 I’m not sure how to minimise the impact but great that you’ve asked for ideas because at least that’s productive! Rather than just my grumbling. I’ll post what I think of

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Howdydooo · 05/01/2021 01:29

@hopingforonlychild thank you for your insight, how long did your school closures last for when you were 11 please

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Jijithecat · 05/01/2021 01:31

Feel totally abandoned. Our schools shut without even any provision for key worker/vulnerable children tomorrow, yet everyone knew this was coming.
To top it all off our council are considering closing the playgrounds too. It's like children don't matter around here.

Beebityboo · 05/01/2021 01:31

My DD was 4 when this started and she'll be 6 in June. Her childhood is being completely defined by this fucking virus and its devastating.

Howdydooo · 05/01/2021 01:41

It’s unbelievable. People (adults) are forcing children to sacrifice childhood and I don’t think that is overstating matters.

Not being able to have playmates for long durations of time, for a year? I mean seriously who is actually kidding themselves into believing that is not seriously, seriously damaging

It’s not even just about school (though that’s a big part of it). If schools close then playmate bubbles (small) should be allowed, facilitated by families who agree to it

It’s effectively torturing young kids who are the least able to cope with the torture

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Howdydooo · 05/01/2021 01:42

And the people making these decisions, or supporting these decisions, will never have had to do this as children themselves

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FortunesFave · 05/01/2021 01:44

It's like Flowers in the Attic isn't it!

tolerable · 05/01/2021 01:45

ok.they\you are looking at it wrong.pick a song with a dance to go with it and team effort learn it then do 2-3 times a day.keep a happiness journal-simple down two 2 reasons you smiled today.
i dont understand the misery when the alternative is clear

5zeds · 05/01/2021 01:47

I think they will become the most resilient and thoughtful generation wehaveeverseen.

Happyhappyday · 05/01/2021 01:47

Maybe it would be better to prepare them for the long haul rather than trying to put an end date on it? I'm in the US in a state with a very sensible governor and we never stopped locking down as it is based on ACTUALLY getting the virus under control, which never really happened in either country. Even our more relaxed lockdown was stricter than the current lock down in the UK - playgrounds were closed until September, schools have never reopened for anyone, lots of nurseries shut for 3-4 months. I know lots of kids and families have found it really tough... and we have a little one, but people have also just got on with things, played outside a lot, seen friends from a distance, gone for bike rides etc.

It's easy to focus on the negative but this is the situation we're in, we can't do anything about it but stay home, best keep calm and carry on (cannot believe I am an American saying that...).

Lindtballsrock · 05/01/2021 01:47

All you can do is keep trying to focus on the positives. No one can argue this is good for children...it just isn’t. But the children aren’t hiding in bunkers/basements from bombs and having their food rationed..as children did in this country a few generations ago, and as children still are in some other countries. If your children are safe, warm, loved and well fed then they are still doing pretty well comparatively and their life chances are still going to be better than many others despite the pandemic and school closures. There is no dressing this up as being a great time...it is not a great time and it’s just not possible to keep everything normal for children at the moment. But all you can do is try to role model positivity and resilience for them, and access as much support/help as feasibly possible to get through this. It will come to an end in a few months, we just have to get through it day by day until then.

Howdydooo · 05/01/2021 01:48

@5zeds I really hope you are right

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