Has everyone really stopped having sex?

[notevenat20]

It’s early and I am stressed so what better than to worry about other peoples sex life.

Have all the single (or maybe not single) women here really just not had sex with anyone new in 2020? Have teenagers really stopped shagging? It just seems inhuman if true.

What about people who've committed themselves to celibacy?

@Cabincrewclare

Hubby and I are very regular outdoor enjoyer, tbh winter can beat summer, no annoying bugs, less people around, great way to keep warm haha

You may have just solved the problem of ever-present-at-home DD

@notevenat20

People are capable of controlling themselves, it's not that shocking surely?

I find it shocking. Sex and eating are fundamental to life.

I actually really disagree with this (and I say this as someone who likes sex by the way). As soon as you start describing sex as something essential to life it becomes something people are entitled to and you get into justifying prostitution/exploitative porn/coercive relationships wierdo incel territory.

My partner and I stopped having sex near the beginning of lockdown, the longest we'd gone without before then was 3 months after our son was born. Too stressed, put on too much weight, really can't be arsed with it at all

@notevenat20 I live in Cornwall so I was tier 1 for a while. Tier 3 now and our numbers are rocketing hence thinking I can next schedule it in at Easter

Oh I'm also now a VIP member of love honey

Also as soon as you start going on about what happens in prisons as an example, you are going down the road of men have neeeeds. If women dont have sex with men then men can't be blamed for their actions. That is bullshit. Not everyone in prison rapes their fellow prisoners just as (sigh) not all men outside of prison rape the women near them. It is interesting that the chance of being a victim of sexual assault in male prisons is 25% (about the same as a woman's chance of being raped outside of prison) but I think all that indicates is the men who would be raping women if they were free, are having to rape and abuse men because thats all thats available. But thats a whole other discussion.

Seriously it is technically illegal to have casual sex, how many young girls (who would already be reluctant to seek care for sexual health or pregnancy) are now refusing to get care because they are scared of getting in to trouble with the covid policr

New heights of ridiculousness here. Where will you fevered imagination take you next?

@Eckhart I believe, in the case of men, their penis drops of?

Well I have the highly unpopular opinion that we are too sex-obsessed as a society. I've not had sex in six years by choice and no I'm not asexual or any other kind of niche sexuality. I get it bothers other people more but I do think people should be able to cope in a pandemic without sex. But given what society is I expect a lot of people have carried on anyway.

Being locked down in a tiny house with paper thin walls and DD 24 (who lost her job at the start of LD1 so never leaves the house, and is pretty much nocturnal) has pretty much put the kybosh on any kind of sex life. It's so frustrating as DH has been wfh since March so if it'd been us there'd have been plenty of lunchtime opportunities and so on. We've been climbing the walls but with absolutely no privacy there's been no chance.

She might start leaving the house for daily exercise if you start taking daily exercise indoors. She's 24, she can just deal with it.

What do you think is the consequence of not having sex for years and years?

Nothing much happens. I speak from experience. I just switched off. Experience of not having sex for years that is, I've never been imprisoned.

@EeeehElsie

We've gone from 2 or 3 times a week to once or twice a month, if we're lucky. Being locked down in a tiny house with paper thin walls and DD 24 (who lost her job at the start of LD1 so never leaves the house, and is pretty much nocturnal) has pretty much put the kybosh on any kind of sex life. It's so frustrating as DH has been wfh since March so if it'd been us there'd have been plenty of lunchtime opportunities and so on. We've been climbing the walls but with absolutely no privacy there's been no chance.

That's absurd.

Why on earth are you letting adult offspring rule your life like this?!

Tell her you want some time to yourselves and she needs to go out for a couple of hours!

Whether that be to give you privacy for sex or just to have some time alone, it's ridiculous that you would allow her behaviour to curtail your lives like that. I wouldn't allow my DC to simply become nocturnal and never leave my house. No chance.

She needs to get her arse into gear and do something constructive!

Apologies for the rant but I find it incredible that parents would allow adult children to dictate their lives like this.

@SofiaMichelle there's not really anywhere she can go though, save wandering the streets. She's applying for jobs constantly but there's nothing. She's starting a master's later this year so hopefully that will get her out of the house occasionally! Also we bought her some noise cancelling headphones for Christmas, so that might help too

In 'normal times' though no, we wouldn't put up with it. But we're all aware that things aren't normal at the moment so sacrifices are unavoidable.

She might start leaving the house for daily exercise if you start taking daily exercise indoors

[quote yetanothernamitynamechange]@Eckhart I believe, in the case of men, their penis drops of?[/quote]
I see. I hadn't realised. What happens to women?

This is very alarming.

@Eckhart I am not quite certain, but I believe women become shrivelled up old harridens, or possibly (lowers voice) lesbians. Alternatively there is a school of thought that says we women can have sex any time we please we just enjoy the power trip that comes from withholding it. So, as this theory posits, this is not a problem women face.

@yetanothernamitynamechange

You're an education! Social distancing is causing more problems than I thought...

I see. I hadn't realised. What happens to women?

Perhaps we are but men whose penises dropped off from lack of use.
And perhaps I need more sleep.

@BertramLacey

I see. I hadn't realised. What happens to women?

Perhaps we are but men whose penises dropped off from lack of use.
And perhaps I need more sleep.

I thought that too, Bertram, and I got 9 hours last night. No excuse.

I wish I could tbh. It's shit.

God I miss sex. Its been nearly 3 years - its depressing that I stopped having sex at 37. No chance of it now I'm widowed too. Would feel like betraying DH.

I dated a guy from the beginning of may until the end of July, technically that was against the rules but I’d already had covid so figured it was pretty low risk.

Then I met someone else in my local pub in august, was a drunken one night stand or so I thought. He was working in the area and we saw each other pretty much every day until he left in mid September. The original plan was that that would be that, but a couple of days before he left we were lying there clinging to each other and sobbing because the idea of not seeing each other again was so sad. He’d never had a gf before because of the nature of his job meaning he is constantly moving from place to place. So we decided to try and make a go of things despite the logistical issues.

It’s been a challenge, but we’ve made it work so far. His house is 4.5 hours away and he’s been back to see me twice, for a few days at a time. And he was working abroad for two months, in a country that had closed its borders to the U.K., but I managed to go and see him for 2 long weekends during his time there, by doing some heavy duty lying to border control - I also took a corona test before I went each time.

He went back to his home country for Christmas and he was going to come back for new year, but then super Rona happened here and he couldn’t get a flight back. He finally got back to England yesterday and we were super excited that we’d get to see each other, but hours after his flight landed he got a call from his sister saying her husband has got covid, and my bf has had contact with him so now has to do a test before we can see each other. It’s been 4 weeks now which is the longest we’ve gone. And now they are talking about tier 5 which could be an issue, as hotels will be closed (he hasn’t met my DC yet or stayed at mine).

We have broken some rules along the way, but I’ve completely fallen for him and he feels the same. My mental health is historically not great, but chatting to him every day (he’s hilarious) and looking forward to seeing him is keeping me afloat. I’d be struggling hell of a lot more than I am if he wasn’t in my life.

I'm strictly celibate anyway, for spiritual reasons. Celibacy can be powerful, and very positive for some women. I love it, and it's an important part of my identity. Of course I recognise that it wouldn't be for everyone. But I LOVE it

@notevenat20

People are capable of controlling themselves, it's not that shocking surely?

I find it shocking. Sex and eating are fundamental to life.

Maybe to some people but lots of others aren't that fussed. It's fun but to me it's very much an extra not an essential.

@WanderingFruitWonderer do you masturbate? Hey, if you can't ask on an anonymous forum, when can you?