AIBU to say enough now?

[Enoughnowstop]

I am not sure I can take any more.

I am a single parent. I am over 50. My children depend on me to bring in a wage and keep a roof over our heads. One of my children is a type 1 diabetic and as such, vulnerable to this virus. I am without support as my parents are dead and I am an only child. I am a teacher and a good one. I love my job. I want to be in the classroom and I want to be supportive of the students I work with.

I have read thread after thread on here in the last 24 hours with people looking to find loopholes or claim to just use 'common sense' so that, for the sake of their mental health, they can get through the next 4 weeks. People who have every intention of meeting up with others, even if it is 'just' outside. People who want their children in school because they can't possibly cope with their children at home in lockdown and what about their rights to an education, a future and their mental health.

I have spent an hour this morning quietly sobbing in my room whilst reading this shit. The utter lack of social responsibility and refusal to see a bigger picture. Not one fuck given about either the physical or mental health of every single person now working in key positions knowing that potentially, things are worse than they were 7 months or so ago. When you want to push your child in the pram and don't see why meeting up with someone else pushing their child in a pram, despite the rules being 2 people not 4 people but it's OK because your mental health can't take any more, maybe just give a thought to those of us who are cramming ourselves into small rooms without ventilation with 32 people who refuse to wear masks because they're exempt and who are transmitting the virus with few.....statistics suggest that there will be anywhere between 5 and 50 students in my school tomorrow who will have that virus. A russian roulette of whether or not I will end up in a room with one of them. I mean how could we be anything but mentally unhealthy knowing full well that tomorrow might be the day we contract this virus and our lives change forever? Who is protecting the mental and physical health of keyworkers? Does anyone actually care about the mental and physical health of keyworkers?

Maybe just start thinking about the mental health of every single person and every single person's right to life and our children's right to have a physically and mentally well parent, capable of meeting their needs.

And please, feel free to professionally insult me some more, becuase that's what always happens on these threads, tell me we don't need teachers like you and if you're that bothered, get another job there are thousands of unemployed just waiting in the wings to take over. Well, no, you can't do without me and my colleagues, our experience, our skills, our professionalism. Just as you can't do without the medical professionals who are facing dealing with this shit again because your right to mental health negates our right to both physical and mental health.

Your rights don't usurp mine. I don't have much faith in this government, but they are what they are. They are making the rules. Follow them. Remember you are not the only one struggling. Be grateful that you're not the one doing the keyworking and be supportive of those of us who are by remembering we also have a right to be physically and mentally healthy. There is balance required. For all of us. We all have a right to a future. Let's make sure those who's future is taken from them in this pandemic number as few, not as many, as possible.

As for me, I think my resignation is on the cards. I think anything at all is better than this.

Really feel for everyone in positions like yourself. Some will bend and flex the rules so much, it’s not fair on those who really have to sacrifice so much more. Do what’s right for your family.

So you don't have the 'energy' to engage with the people whose very real issues you have shat on OP?

Luckily the govt have recognised that your suggestion that parents of young children should not be allowed out in effect would be unreasonable.

Presumably you can explain why those prams are so objectionable?

Fwiw I too work in a school. I feel quite vulnerable. But having nearly lost my mother to suicide during last lockdown, and having to drive her to the psych ward myself and leave her shaking and crying there for over 6 wks due to the utter inability of the NHS to assist her in maintaining her mental health, I cannot empathise with you fully as you seem so utterly callous toward others despite wanting allowances from them.

I really don’t understand why closing school is an option. What about vulnerable children? Surely teachers know what some of the most vulnerable children face at home? I can’t believe how easily those children’s well being is disregarded.

Also OP, a person breaking the rules may be severely mentally distressed and rule breaking is their last resort before doing something considerably worse.

Completely with you Enoughnowstop

Where else in this country are people required to work in such close proximity to others in large groups without any PPE.. you may have mental Heath issues but that does not equate to being put in the firing line INTENTIONALLY with no form of protection from a virus that could make your child with type 1 very poorly.

It's about the lack of autonomy that is being put upon you in order to do your job. Supermarket Workers got screens and customers mostly wear masks. Delivery drivers can make their own decisions about how close they get. Police can wear masks . I interviewed a suspect whilst wearing a mask the interview room was big enough for SD and their lawyer was in an IPad.. our briefings are held remotely .. so why the hell should you be expected to work like this ?

I do not understand what your unions are doing to protect you. Where are the HSE ?

You are absolutely right. No ones 'right' to ignore the rules or have an education trumps your right to work in an environment where all possible safety precautions are taken - in line with every other worker. I would urge every teacher traumatised by this situation to see their GP and been signed off sick with stress then perhaps the government will be forced to do something - along the lines of the U.S . In the states with the fewest cases and lowest spread are either all teaching remotely or doing 2 weeks in , 2 weeks remote to allow proper social distancing in schools where space to do so makes it impossible.

Exactly @Izzy30.

My 14 year old is not vulnerable, but he is an only child and I am a single parent and fulltime keyworker on a low wage with no support right now. He needs to be in school. I can't imagine what children who are actually vulnerable would be facing.

I would also like to know where everyone is getting the 'fact' that suicide rates have increased since lockdown ?
The ONS does keep this data but only releases it after a measured time period. The only current data for this group is from 2018.

fullfact.org/online/suicide-200-percent/

I do sympathise with you OP as working in a school now is a hard job and you are at risk of catching Covid. I have plenty of friends who are teachers who have health problems and are stressed.

But your lack of empathy for others is hard to read. As is the poster sneering at those of us who 'can't bear not seeing their boyfriends for a few weeks'. I don't think people understand how hard it is to be alone when you have a partner to go through this with. Seeing my boyfriend has made life seem manageable. And for him too.

And for mums with babies in prams. What extra risk would two babies in prams cause? Or now it's 'in the rules' is that ok. Even if the rules aren't clear, don't make sense etc?

MummyPop00

What a horrible disgusting post.

This is what happens to traumatised under pressure staff. This is ICU nurses but other frontline workers are also at increased risk of burn out or break down. People like OP deserve our support.

www.google.com/amp/s/www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2020/10/31/traumatised-intensive-care-nurses-sectioned-wake-first-wave/amp/

If this continues, schools will close whether people like it or not. They can't stay open without the staff - who will be off sick (Covid, Long Covid, or stress/PTSD).

The WHO has Covid safe school guidelines. We should implement them.

www.diabetes.org.uk/about_us/news/coronavirus

@StarCat2020

Yes, aware of all that. It might not bother you but it is a massive worry to me. NHS at breaking point and child goes into DKA? Not good.

I have a disabled child and no help outside of DH, I have nightmares about us both catching covid at the same time and being unable to care for her/accompany her to hospital if she was unwell.

I also have nothing but respect for teachers. They have been well and truly thrown under the bus in all this.

I hear you and its such a shit situation. I'm sorry you are struggling

I have read thread after thread on here in the last 24 hours with people looking to find loopholes or claim to just use 'common sense' so that, for the sake of their mental health, they can get through the next 4 weeks. People who have every intention of meeting up with others, even if it is 'just' outside.

I have so much sympathy for you - you sound exhausted and demoralised and I feel for anyone who is working through this who feels at risk.

However you have no idea what others are going through. None. There is no point wasting energy on getting upset about how other people are behaving because you don't have the full picture. You can only control your own actions and try to remember you only know a fraction about other peoples' lives if they're behaving in a way that pushes your buttons. It is such a waste of energy getting angry about something you have no control over. Yes some people are horribly selfish or don't believe in the virus - there will always be people like that. Far more people are decent human beings who are on their knees and are just doing what they can to survive this. You have no idea what other things they've faced in their lives.

There has been ENDLESS judgement on here towards other people and it's ruined the site. You do you. There is no future where people will miraculously do what you need them to do, unfortunately. There never will be on any issue.

I think the big problem is that even without covid.. There is such a divide between people now. No sense of community or looking out for each other. Its dog eat dog which is very very sad. However with such a difference between parts of the country... Even looking at North v South. People do not care about people they don't know as sad as that is.

Now if that's the case befor covid, why would it change now were in a pandemic? How many people. Can honestly say they stop for a homeless people to give them some food warmth or even some company?... Not many of us that's for sure.

Something like that would take little to no effort but many of us don't bother to do it as its an inconvinience. So why would people drastically change their lives for the benifit of a few people if they cant be botherd to go slightly out of their way to help one person?

The utter unawareness of some people. Because they insist on refusing to comply with containment - because they want to see their mum for a cup of tea - other people will never ever again see their mum (because of being dead).

Africa and Asia Pacific countries have more foresight, common sense, and morals.

OP, you don't have to justify yourself, you are not wrong to feel frustrated, worried and angry about the whole situation. Do what is right for you.

There is only one practical piece of advice I can offer you - take vitamin D supplements to boost your immune system. Many people in the UK are deficient in Vit D during the autumn/winter, and this vitamin is known to help the immune system fight viruses. See the YT channel of Dr John Campbell - he has many videos explaining this. Take care, OP.

Because they insist on refusing to comply with containment - because they want to see their mum for a cup of tea - other people will never ever again see their mum (because of being dead)

I will be following the rules but there’s a flip side to this. There are plenty of people whose mothers will not be here after lockdown. Not because they have died from coronavirus, but because they have died from the many other causes which kill people. So by not seeing their loved ones in lockdown, a lot of people will miss out on their last chance to see them.

I’m not saying people shouldn’t comply but I don’t like your logic that we shouldn’t see people now so we can see them afterwards because the reverse is going to be true in a fuckload of cases.

There are plenty of people whose mothers will not be here after lockdown. Not because they have died from coronavirus, but because they have died from the many other causes which kill people. So by not seeing their loved ones in lockdown, a lot of people will miss out on their last chance to see them.

This is being entirely forgotten about in all this. It's heartbreaking.

Yes, aware of all that. It might not bother you but it is a massive worry to me. NHS at breaking point and child goes into DKA? Not good
Why would I not be bothered?

I shouldn't have posted just the link I admit but I thought that the information might be reassuring to you.

I think that this whole shit show is awful and bearing the brunt of it all is most definitely not affecting people equally.

Is tthere anything that I can do or not do that would help you at all?

Terminal illness - where someone only has one month's left, is always sad.

That's very different to the majority of wannabe non compliers who simply won't go a couple of weeks without a cuppa with a family member... despite knowing that could mean many others never get to have a tea with their family member again. Which is heartbreaking.

It's the I Want To Do Whatever I Want Now lot who help drag this out for much much longer than necessary. Unlike places like Australia, Taiwan, the Isle of Man, and New Zealand - where everyone can see their family.

Unlike places like Australia, Taiwan, the Isle of Man, and New Zealand - where everyone can see their family. You do know that almost 30% of Australians are immigrants? Many will not be seeing their families any time soon.

@Pascal2908 London Ambulance Service callouts to suicide attempts or suicides - they shared figures that showed an increase since April. Local policing teams have also reported an increase in calls to attempted suicides. And as awful as teachers have it, I can sure you it is no walk in the park for the policeman who has to spend an hour talking down a suicidal man with a knife who can't take isolation anymore. Or the paramedic teams who couldn't resucitate a young woman who had been trying to access mental health provision for 6 months. I have friends volunteering at Samaritans and Crisisline who hear calls from people who have lost everything and in despair - EVERYONE is suffering. Even if you can't see it.

All death is awful. More people die from diarrhea globally (1.7mn annually) than Covid so far. So judging everyone as callous and horrible and thinking only teachers have it rough is really lacking in empathy.

@SheepandCow

Terminal illness - where someone only has one month's left, is always sad.

That's very different to the majority of wannabe non compliers who simply won't go a couple of weeks without a cuppa with a family member... despite knowing that could mean many others never get to have a tea with their family member again. Which is heartbreaking.

It's the I Want To Do Whatever I Want Now lot who help drag this out for much much longer than necessary. Unlike places like Australia, Taiwan, the Isle of Man, and New Zealand - where everyone can see their family.

It’s not just terminal illness. People can be fit and well one day and be struck down by a stroke/heart attack/aneurysm. No one knows who among us that will apply to.

Good to see the newfound public awareness and concern for mental health and suicides. The silver lining of this pandemic. It's done what even being condemned by the UN (the many deaths including soaring suicides due to benefit 'reforms' failed to do.