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AIBU to say enough now?

273 replies

Enoughnowstop · 01/11/2020 11:16

I am not sure I can take any more.

I am a single parent. I am over 50. My children depend on me to bring in a wage and keep a roof over our heads. One of my children is a type 1 diabetic and as such, vulnerable to this virus. I am without support as my parents are dead and I am an only child. I am a teacher and a good one. I love my job. I want to be in the classroom and I want to be supportive of the students I work with.

I have read thread after thread on here in the last 24 hours with people looking to find loopholes or claim to just use 'common sense' so that, for the sake of their mental health, they can get through the next 4 weeks. People who have every intention of meeting up with others, even if it is 'just' outside. People who want their children in school because they can't possibly cope with their children at home in lockdown and what about their rights to an education, a future and their mental health.

I have spent an hour this morning quietly sobbing in my room whilst reading this shit. The utter lack of social responsibility and refusal to see a bigger picture. Not one fuck given about either the physical or mental health of every single person now working in key positions knowing that potentially, things are worse than they were 7 months or so ago. When you want to push your child in the pram and don't see why meeting up with someone else pushing their child in a pram, despite the rules being 2 people not 4 people but it's OK because your mental health can't take any more, maybe just give a thought to those of us who are cramming ourselves into small rooms without ventilation with 32 people who refuse to wear masks because they're exempt and who are transmitting the virus with few.....statistics suggest that there will be anywhere between 5 and 50 students in my school tomorrow who will have that virus. A russian roulette of whether or not I will end up in a room with one of them. I mean how could we be anything but mentally unhealthy knowing full well that tomorrow might be the day we contract this virus and our lives change forever? Who is protecting the mental and physical health of keyworkers? Does anyone actually care about the mental and physical health of keyworkers?

Maybe just start thinking about the mental health of every single person and every single person's right to life and our children's right to have a physically and mentally well parent, capable of meeting their needs.

And please, feel free to professionally insult me some more, becuase that's what always happens on these threads, tell me we don't need teachers like you and if you're that bothered, get another job there are thousands of unemployed just waiting in the wings to take over. Well, no, you can't do without me and my colleagues, our experience, our skills, our professionalism. Just as you can't do without the medical professionals who are facing dealing with this shit again because your right to mental health negates our right to both physical and mental health.

Your rights don't usurp mine. I don't have much faith in this government, but they are what they are. They are making the rules. Follow them. Remember you are not the only one struggling. Be grateful that you're not the one doing the keyworking and be supportive of those of us who are by remembering we also have a right to be physically and mentally healthy. There is balance required. For all of us. We all have a right to a future. Let's make sure those who's future is taken from them in this pandemic number as few, not as many, as possible.

As for me, I think my resignation is on the cards. I think anything at all is better than this.

OP posts:
TiersTiersTiers · 02/11/2020 07:49

I agree with you. There are a lot of extremely selfish people who are looking for anyway possible to not follow guidelines and I think that is why there is a second lock down.

Good luck to you all Flowers

Ilovecheese53 · 02/11/2020 07:51

@Mittens030869

I hear you, OP. There is a lot of selfishness on these boards. Admittedly, the last thing I want is for schools to close, as the lockdown in the spring was very bad for my (adopted) DDs, as they need routine. It was also extremely hard for my DH and me, as he’s WFH and I’ve had long Covid for the last seven months.

But teachers have been treated very badly; they should absolutely be allowed to wear PPE like other key workers.

There’s a very good thread at the minute discussing PPE. No key workers have PPE. Even most hospital staff do not have a FFP3 mask to wear. A mask from bought from Poundland is not PPE!!
NorbertMeubles · 02/11/2020 07:52

All the people looking for loopholes so they can do stuff is the reason we are all still in this mess. These people are selfish and have the 'the rules can't possibly apply to me!' attitude. Selfish beyond belief.

DumplingsAndStew · 02/11/2020 07:52

@Goingdooolally

As a teacher, don't you see the importance of giving accurate information?

In Scotland from tomorrow senior students plus teachers need to wear a mask.

That's not true. That only applies in level 3 and 4 areas.

kowari · 02/11/2020 07:55

I think YABU to describe other people's situations and worries as 'this shit'.

Zippy1510 · 02/11/2020 07:55

I’m with you too. I teach at a university and we are still doing f2f- as much as we can accommodate safely whilst still social distancing across campus and all we get is complaints about the mental health of the poor students not being able to do a, b and c. These are adults- peoples personal freedom does not trump public health.

AlternativePerspective · 02/11/2020 07:57

I’m not a teacher but agree with you and am sick of the people who seem to think that the rules don’t apply to them, and like a PP, sick of people constantly throwing around the Mental Health excuse for doing whatever the fuck they want.

Perhaps think about how it will affect their mental health if they catch COVID and give it to someone vulnerable who dies.

Personally I think we should stay in lockdown well through Christmas into the new year. Otherwise people are just going to do whatever they want over Christmas and flock to the pubs and the bars and the new year will be a write off with a 3rd wave....

Cancel Christmas and get the country back on track, with severe penalties for those who break the rules. Fines of £10000 and above...

Racoonworld · 02/11/2020 07:57

@Bambooble I know, and it really shows on a thread supposedly full of women. I can’t believe someone in what’s supposed to be a caring profession would have that attitude towards other women and new mums. We should be supporting each other not having a go because a mum dares to want a walk with one friend. We’ve been without support for months now and I just can’t do it anymore and people like this just make me want to throw everything in.

Bambooble · 02/11/2020 08:01

@Racoonworld my inbox is always open if you need an anon ear to vent to, its heartbreaking and the irony is that people proclaiming everyone else is selfish as it's putting them in danger are also being selfish by putting their needs above all. Please reach out if you need support, and do go for a walk, even the scientists acknowledge a walk outdoors, especially if distanced is extremely safe, and it can make all of the difference. My friend followed the rules to the letter, I wish she hadn't, if she had made it through until the rule of 6 came in, there is a chance we would have noticed and could have done something more to help. I agree that those who do what they want for no real reason just because they want to are selfish, but for those struggling, it isn't fair to assume everyone who mentions MH is pulling a fast one. Flowers

AwaAnBileYerHeid · 02/11/2020 08:05

I'm 100% with you OP.

BurningTheToast · 02/11/2020 08:11

I hear you OP and I feel for you.

My sister is a teacher and clinically vulnerable and it amazes me some people are so dismissive of her health and safety. All the guff from people about how they won't comply with another lockdown, the picking apart of the rules to find loopholes, and just plain whingeing makes me want to scream.

It also seems that those people who don't want to comply are often those most insistent that schools should be open. That schools can only stay open if the R number drops and that in order for that to happen we need to operate within the lockdown rules seems to be completely beyond their grasp.

Stay safe, OP and all the other key workers.

Goingdooolally · 02/11/2020 08:13

[quote DumplingsAndStew]@Goingdooolally

As a teacher, don't you see the importance of giving accurate information?

In Scotland from tomorrow senior students plus teachers need to wear a mask.

That's not true. That only applies in level 3 and 4 areas.[/quote]
It was late, I was tired and trying to help and support the OP. I didn’t think that that level of detail was important, in the context. Also, some schools are extending their requirement all the way down to S1. But yes it is only S4 and up.

I don’t think there is any need for your nasty response. I feel quite upset by that. I’m going into school today to teach, wearing a mask (which I’m dreading) and I don’t need some nasty little keyboard warrior trying to make me feel like shit (especially when I was just trying to be supportive and helpful!)

chocolatesaltyballs22 · 02/11/2020 08:21

I was with you until you started talking about schools. I'm sorry you're struggling. We all are. But the one thing I'm grateful for right now is that schools are open. My daughter is in her final year of A levels and I'd rather her entire future wasn't ruined because she didn't get a vital year of education.

queenofknives · 02/11/2020 08:25

Maybe just start thinking about the mental health of every single person and every single person's right to life and our children's right to have a physically and mentally well parent, capable of meeting their needs.

I think you might be asking a bit much there OP. Most people are struggling just to get through the days and think of themselves and their loved ones.

I do think teachers have been handed a very unfair role to play in all of this. I'm a teacher myself but working from home at the moment, and as much as I miss being in the classroom, I'm grateful for that. I agree with pp saying get signed off for a few weeks before you decide whether you want to resign. Good luck, whatever you decide to do.

pralineandketchup · 02/11/2020 08:27

Good job OP, well done. Ignore anybody who is piling on as they don't know what it's like.

Youandmeareluckytobeus · 02/11/2020 08:28

Why the hell is it not compulsory for ALL teachers and ALL pupils to wear masks ALL the time in a school setting?

It would protect far more people in society if that were to be the case.

WanderingMilly · 02/11/2020 08:28

I am with you on this; I hope the fact that many of us are supportive of you helps a little....

I work part-time in a school in a non-teaching capacity. We are a private school so they feel they can do what they like...our teachers have no PPE (Head specifically said he would prefer it if they don't wear it) and the children are young so no social distancing at all and obviously not in masks, all crammed into a small space.

I see children who are sick, we do at least have an isolation room now as I caught COVID just before the last lockdown from an ill child. We share desks/phones etc. in the office which shouldn't be acceptable, we have no screens, even the keys are shared - why can't they just give us our own set? But no, everything handled by everyone with no cleaning in between....

I am the only staff member who uses sanitiser to clean everything down on my shift, no-one else bothers and they think I'm being too cautious about it. Their mantra is constantly "well, there's no virus here" which is blatantly wrong, since children are being sent home for testing all the time. We are supposed to keep quiet about the special marks against their names on the electronic register.

Now we have another lockdown, but schools are not shutting. All schools should be shut, primary as well as secondary. And some recognition of the fact that most other key workers (healthcare, delivery drivers and so on) all wear PPE and take special measures....except teachers/school staff. It isn't right.....

Wherehavetheteletubbiesgone · 02/11/2020 08:33

[quote TheGinGenie]@KarlKennedysDurianFruit have you ever gone 12 weeks without seeing another single person at all? Have you ever felt suicidal?

Why don't we all be a bit less judgey and a bit more empathetic to the fact that this is very tough on an awful lot of people for a lot of different reasons. [/quote]
Because empathy doesn't get rid of the virus. China didn't erradicate it from its borders by being empathetic. The population just got down and complied. Yes if we fully locked down and enforced it there would be suicides but we would still save more lives from Covid.

DumplingsAndStew · 02/11/2020 08:33

@Goingdooolally

"Nasty little keyboard warrior"? For pointing out that you are spreading false information?

I'm sorry that you are upset and know that the new rules for some Scottish schools will be hard, but your response is entirely disproportionate.

Racoonworld · 02/11/2020 08:36

@Wherehavetheteletubbiesgone so you think it’s ok to have more suicides but not more Covid deaths? Despite many of those commiting suicide likely wouldn’t die from Covid?

Racoonworld · 02/11/2020 08:37

The world really has gone mad

Racoonworld · 02/11/2020 08:37

@Bambooble thank you that means a lot. Feel free to pm me too if you need to.

bravotango · 02/11/2020 08:37

Yes if we fully locked down and enforced it there would be suicides but we would still save more lives from Covid.

Wow

Bambooble · 02/11/2020 08:39

China didn't erradicate it from its borders by being empathetic. The population just got down and complied

No they didn't, they complied as they physically had no choice as doors were welded shut, and there were severe punishment for those who didn't comply; thankfully we don't live in a country where that can happen. Suicide rates amongst young people especially rose following lockdown, I don't think that's a fair price for young people to pay personally. There should be a balance, as is trying to be struck here.

Etinox · 02/11/2020 08:40

Flowers OP
Over 50 techer here, although I’m currently delivering workshops to small groups of adults. I wear a visor, stand well back and keep the room like the car deck on a Scottish ferry well ventilated. The risk of transmission rises with time so if you can’t have an Arctic gale blowing through all the time, at least open the doors and windows between classes.
Flowers