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Daughter 24 wants to come home

762 replies

AinJD · 28/03/2020 20:55

DD loves London but is working from her little room in a shared house currently as office is closed - life so different from normal and says she just wants to come home (to North Yorkshire) where she can have more space and will feel somehow safer with family. DH reluctantly (is it essential?) said he’ll fetch her tomorrow if she’s sure she wants to be here till the end of the lockdown. He will go there and back, no interactions with anyone but her. We all feel guilty already at going against the spirit of the guidance, but she’s taken care to walk everywhere for the past two weeks, is not ill and will self-isolate in her room here for seven days on arrival. It is probably not essential but feels natural for her to want to be here with us and of course we don’t really in our hearts want to say no. We almost wish there was a form to fill in for this mission!

OP posts:
Hairyfairy01 · 29/03/2020 21:32

Your dd wouldn't be registered to a gp in your local area op...,,,,

Mittens030869 · 29/03/2020 22:23

Mental health is actually a very real problem at the moment, though, so minimising that isn't helpful either. I'm not saying that the claim isn't misused (it is all the time by some), but it is very difficult for people living on their own with MH issues.

My DB has very longstanding MH issues going back to the childhood abuse he suffered alongside my DSis and me. My DM calls him every day to check up on him and has visited him recently. (Not the best idea as she's 89 and his hygiene isn't exactly the best, but no one else would so I can understand why she would.).

He's not doing well under lockdown at all. My DM hasn't suggested that he move in with her, but she's understandably very concerned about him.

AlexaAmbidextra · 29/03/2020 22:58

Mental health is actually a very real problem at the moment, though, so minimising that isn't helpful either. I'm not saying that the claim isn't misused (it is all the time by some), but it is very difficult for people living on their own with MH issues.

I know. It’s very real for some. That’s what I said. But ‘mental health’ has been thrown about on here since the dawn of time. People claiming it for everyday, understandable emotions are not doing those with serious issues any favours. Not everything needs a label.

Mittens030869 · 29/03/2020 23:22

And I agreed that the term has been misused if you'd read my whole post, I get annoyed by that myself as I have MH issues, PTSD as a result of childhood abuse and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. But this period of lockdown will be potentially very damaging to those living alone with MH issues, and a lot of them won't get the help they need. It's something that needs to be taken seriously, and I don't see it happening with Social Care and the NHS already over-stretched.

BumbleBeee69 · 29/03/2020 23:33

the woefully pathetic excuses being rolled out and used on this Thread as justification for breaking Non Essential Travel bans is downright fucking appalling...

You disgust me.. every single one of you...

Mittens030869 · 29/03/2020 23:50

I'm certainly not using mental health to justify anyone travelling anywhere needlessly. My DB is living at his flat and my DM at her house. His hygiene is very poor, so it would be totally inappropriate, especially as my DM is 80.

I'm saying that mental health is something that needs to be taken seriously, not that it justifies anyone anyone not being subject to regulations to protect everyone's health.

I don't know what the answer is, but it is something I'm very concerned about during a time when vulnerable groups could slip out of the net.

I apologise for derailing the thread, however.

LaurieMarlow · 30/03/2020 07:48

I'm saying that mental health is something that needs to be taken seriously, not that it justifies anyone anyone not being subject to regulations to protect everyone's health.

I don’t think anyone disagrees with you on that.

Mental health will definitely suffer and that’s dreadful. I’m not sure what can be done about it.

PaddyF0dder · 30/03/2020 07:50

Non essential travel.

Pretty fucking easy and obvious.

Stay put. Don’t get her.

Roussette · 30/03/2020 07:53

Pretty fucking easy and obvious

Tell that to 100 posters on this thread who disagree and say 'go get her'.

PaddyF0dder · 30/03/2020 08:48

Yeah.

A lot of people can’t understand simple messages, and think that their excuse is a special one.

MarieQueenofScots · 30/03/2020 10:24

A top epidemiologist has suggested that as the north is a couple of weeks behind London, the lockdown may have come in time to spare those cities from the worst of the virus.

THAT is what you’re putting at risk OP, while the rest of us actually up here are doing everything we fucking can to try and protect ourselves and our most vulnerable.

I can’t imagine having such little conscience. I truly hope the OP is still reading and feels some small pang of regret at the possible magnitude of their reprehensible behaviour.

Bluetrews25 · 30/03/2020 10:46

I wonder if the DD did come home, sadly, we may never know.
OP, if you are still out there, and you had a change of heart, do tell us.
Hoping that DD and OP have thought more about doing things for the greater good of all of us, not just what they want that will pose risks to the rest of society.

LaurieMarlow · 30/03/2020 10:52

I think we know Confused

Frownette · 30/03/2020 11:10

I think daughter's home now, hopefully with no repercussions for anyone

Baaaahhhhh · 30/03/2020 11:13

This is really no different from the tens of thousands of uni students who all came home in the last couple of weeks, or all the repatriating travellers, also numbering thousands.

Baaaahhhhh · 30/03/2020 11:16

Also, just to add, because I am being bolshy. Most of the young people who "live" in London, still "reside" at their parents home address. They come home for GP appointments, have all their bank and insurances based from their "home". London living is transitional, and few actually choose to base their lives from there.

Frownette · 30/03/2020 11:21

She's working there (WFH at present) isn't she? As soon as I'd left uni and moved away from family address I changed doctors, dentists, bank etc

eggandonion · 30/03/2020 11:29

My kids use our'home' address for 'household admin', because they tend to move around a bit. Two of them have a GP where they live but also stay registered here (not nhs land) and will only use the dentist they grew up with. One has a car, insured at the address where she lives.

I want to go and get my dd1, but she works in healthcare so probably illegal, and she wouldn't come. DD2 is here since before lockdown, but with hardly any clothes, working from home.

TemoraryUsername · 30/03/2020 11:33

This thread is outright bonkers.

A healthy 24 year old should stay put.

People travelling from London to their country homes and relatives are how Cornwall now has a massive problem - and very few hospitals and beds to deal with it.

If she comes to you and she us a carrier, she may never get symptoms but still spread it.

Biscuit At the service station when you stop for the loo or for fuel (or a meal and break, if you'e really stupid)

Biscuit at home, even during a strict quarantine. Same bathroom, shared spaces, crockery, air. Door handles, light switches...
Biscuit after quarantine (its 14 days not 7 if you ignore my advice. And still thought to be possible to develop into 21+ days. And that's the WHOLE family need to be STRICT quarantine for that time, because you'e exposed to her.
Biscuit dad catches it from her, goes to supermarket, passes it on
Biscuit other people catch it and pass it on to somebody vulnerable who dies.

For fucks sake. Not just for your family but for Yorkshire and any rest stops on the way - she needs to Stay. At. Home.

NewBrideToBe · 30/03/2020 11:47

Obviously they brought her home.

It’s the very definition of “I’m alright Jack”.

Medievalist · 30/03/2020 12:00

This is really no different from the tens of thousands of uni students who all came home in the last couple of weeks, or all the repatriating travellers, also numbering thousands.

You mean the uni students who came home before we were told to only make essential journeys? And the repatriating travellers who have nowhere else to go (though how thousands are currently getting home given the lack of flights I'm not sure).

Yes people still have to travel The key word is essential.

coachman · 30/03/2020 12:06

I've just read that Stephen Kinnock drove from North Wales to London to see his father on his birthday yesterday. Apparently he was 'delivering supplies'.

Contemptible behaviour and it's arrogance like this that will lead to a tighter lockdown.

aloealoealoealoe · 30/03/2020 12:31

My brother died today. Nobody can go to the funeral. Nobody can hug each other. Nobody can give his wife who's got two young children any help or support.

Stay at home for fuck's sake. Selfish selfish selfish people.

Hearhoovesthinkzebras · 30/03/2020 12:33

aloealoealoealoe

I am so sorry

MarieQueenofScots · 30/03/2020 12:34

aloealoealoealoe

I’m so sorry Flowers