30s TTC: The BESH Palace - where the bar never closes, booze is free, the humour is black and babydust is strictly for snorting through a rolled up 20.

[PollyPoo]

Welcome BESHies to the new palais. Plz to come fill it up plz.

For your delight and delectation I have dragged across the bar and the pit. Along with Mitchell (of course) to grant your every wish (but you will probably have to fight Scorps for him first... good luck with that).

I have even brought the Kylie infused absinthe. Now, who will join me in a Blackhole?

You're quite right, Humpy, don't know what I was thinking!

I thought the Doc was going to insert a gerund. Shouldn't have bothered putting on me good pants

Thanks for the advice and tips, Perfick. I will defo ask him to go through my test results, as my Doc doesn't like to give the figures out (although I demanded the FSH ones). Whether she thinks only meddykull profeshnulls like her can understand them, or that I'll drive myself menkul googling them I don't know Have bookmarked that natural IVF link too, cheers. Still thinking my ishoo is my general health being shite, not my ladybits, mind

Sgropy Not for one single moment suggesting that you need the link. Just wanted you to be aware that there might be other options so the bad moments of horrible when it all feels a bit futile are a bit less horrible.

That was an awful sentence.

Droms, I understood your intentions. And it has genuinely cheered me up - knowing that there is something like 'Natural IVF' really does make things seem less futile. But am mildly calm and confident at mo, after seeing Needles Lady. For me, 'mildly' is huge!

I heart ya

I forgot about needles lady! I have more needles tonight - but I have needles man.

Needles and I had almost decided that I should have an AMH/FSH test done privately (he wants me to be reassured that the acupuncture is working). Then chatted it through with TNB and realised that knowing the numbers won't make any difference to the final outcome of the IVF when it gets started, so I might as well just live in blissful ignorance. First positive decision in forever.

Just a quick pop in to say I heard your news weewee and wanted to say I'm made up for you

Huge congrats xxx

(Not lurking, hope you're all ok, bye for now xxx)

I am still spotting strangely. This is the 3rd day. It's either brown smears or (like just now) a fair bit of thick pink discharge. Sorry, I know that's TMI. I just wish someone would say, Chin up Bangers, I've had that and it was NUFFINK! But no-one seems to know what it is. And I know I am going to the GP on Monday and should stop fretting, but I've been so lucky being such a great bouncing healthy heifer of a thing all my life, that any variation is really actually scaring me quite a bit.

Stopping now. I do realise 99% of women have put up with far worse.

Head, everyone gets a bit of weird spotting once in a blue moon - I spotted bright red blood for nearly an entire cycle when I first started going to the gym! But obviously it is worrying you, so you should put your mind at ease. Can you not ring your GP and ask for a call-back? They offer that service at my GPs. Ring and ask if you can just have a quick chat with a Doc. And don't apologise for fretting - when something is very different for you then it is really freaky; the thought of having a bit of cervical erosion made me v panicky, even though it's totally common and harmless. Hope it stops and/or you get some answer soon

I'mreallysorryforbeingmememeandI'mgoingtogrowupnow

Fanks Scorpy. I might phone NHSDirect and hope a nice motherly lady with a unibust answers and is kind to me. That will put my mind at rest until Monday.

G'Luck with the flange quack! Mr Pickles!

Poor head don't apologise for mememe. Ring NHS Direct now!

I'm in a living nightmare.

Phone call from Mum at 3.30 yesterday to say that Dad has got sepsis and is in HDU.

I was packed and out of the door by 4, at bloody Basingstoke bloody hospital by 8.30.

As usual I don't know what the fucking fuck is going on or why they can't fix him. He's having another operation right now.

Death rate for sepsis is about 50/50 so I'm going out of my mind.

Not going to apologise for being me me me today. Just wanted you all to know why I'm not around - and also if I tell you lot I'll have 20 extra people sending positive vibes

Jesus Lyra. I don't know what to say. I'm now diverting all energies your way. Have this and I don't care who sees. And, FWIW, I vote you hassle the drs and nurses like some kind of maniac until you get your answers. Will be thinking of you all night.

Loz called 'em - they'll call back this pm.

lyra absolutely all the luck and good thoughts I can muster are in their way to you. I don't have the words for this...but we are all thinking of you and your family.

Biggest of big love to you xxxxxxxxxx

I know there is nothing I can say to help Lyra but I am focusing all positive energies towards you and your family. All the love sweetheart. I'm thinking of you xxxx

Holy fuck, Lyra. Terrifying. Like what everyone else said, all my thoughts & every scrap of positive energy I can muster are with you.

Love, hugs and more positive vibes from here lyra. Please do bug the hospital staff - we had to do this when Gran was in HDU in October and it was the only way to get some degree of peace of mind. (she pulled through despite giving us all a very nasty scare, if that helps at all.) Thinking of you, your dad and the rest of your family. xxxxxxx

Oh lyra I totally feel your pain. Everything crossed for medical magic xxxxxxx

Oh Lyra. All the very, very, very best. How scary. Thinking of you.

Lyra, my heart goes out to you and yours and am sending squillions of healing vibes to PapaLyra. My Granddad survived Sepsis when he was in his late 80s, if that helps. Don't be afraid to be a total cunt if it gets you answers and gets your Dad every possible advantage. Give em Scorpy-Hell, my lovely Birthday Twin. HUGE HUGS.

Can we get a bundle for Lyra going on here?

PS Will update on Fanny Man chat when it's more appropriate. But in brief: have 'won' dildocam and lap. HappyHappyJoyJoy.

Ach, even that mini update from me seems crass in light of things.

Thanks lovelies, for thoughts and energy and hugs and crossed fingers. Just been to see dad who was very very confused and aggro, trying to get out of bed, talking crap - apparently he has suffered a "septic shower", meaning his body is just flooded with crap and his temp is sky high. His resting HR and pulse are both about 130 . Was very scary and horrible horrible. We've left him to sleep for a bit and will go back at about 8.

Please don't stop talking about what you're supposed to be talking about because of me - especially you Scorpy. It's me that's being inappropriate really, ranting about such matters on a TTC thread - but I will carry on as long as you carry on chatting about normal shiz

Glad for the update Lyra. I'm most earnestly and sincerely wishing the very best.

Scorsicle, am tentatively glad about the brief briefing of what's inside your briefs ... obviously a lap is not what any of us would choose for our foofs, but if it gets answers, it's good.

I called NHS Direct and they were shit. Just said to see the Doc ASAP and that I should check I'm not diffed. POAS and it was a BFN, as to be expected (droid got me last cycle and 'tis far too early to test this cycle).

To clarify: glad that you'd popped in Lyra dear, not glad that your Pa has been so awfully poorly

Obviously, Headcase! Don't bloody tiptoe round me you lot, don't worry about your phrasing - whatever you say makes me feel better, just because I know you're there xx