Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

30s TTC - Butterdish Smashing World Record Attempt

1000 replies

PollyPoo · 18/02/2010 12:20

Line up, line up for the world record attempt for most dropped butterdishes per fred.

The bar is here, along with squishy sofas, some fluffy beanbags, low lighting, and most important of all, free booze.

I have installed some naked waiters (Morgan from being human, together with Russell Howard) - they have trays of champagne cocktails that can never run out, so dig in laydeez and lets make this a fred to remember.

OP posts:
Ariesgirl · 28/02/2010 12:27

Mmmmmmm, hidden jammy centres......

Will not test.
Will not test.
Will not test [chants to self]

Medee · 28/02/2010 12:31

don't mention jam!

Muser · 28/02/2010 12:47

It's actually raspberry apple pie butter according to the label. No J word.

Scorpette · 28/02/2010 12:57

I'm going to stay here and cry even more now, seeing as my food allergies are making me miss out on scrummy muffins!

On the subject of names, me and TYF better have girls only, as I only like supergay retro posho names for boys (as I've said here before).

Ariesgirl · 28/02/2010 13:01

Wot, like Crispin? Valentine? Horatio?

PollyPoo · 28/02/2010 13:46

Mmmmm.... I smelt the muffins... yum! Stuff the allergies - gimme gimme. (virtual muffins are ok surely Scorps?)

The only boys name we like is Sidney. Me and TG can't agree on any others. I like Ansford (after my great grandfather) but it won't go with our surname. He likes Hunter (as in S Thompson) but too many people think of that bloody shit gladiators programme so I have vetoed it. Personally I am hoping for another girl. Or actually, scratch that - I just want a happy healthy baby.

OP posts:
Scorpette · 28/02/2010 13:55

I like Crispin, what of it? Wouldn't use it though, as went to uni with a Crispin who was a neurotic, sexually-confused ginger vegan who was also the best friend of an ex who must only be referred to as The Evil One no. 2 (sadly, there is a no.1).

Sadly, my picks make your suggestions sound butch and manly: Lysander, Orlando, Florian, Fabian... you name it!

Disclaimer: obviously, I wouldn't use any of those names. Me and TYF also really like mythical names, but as much as we might like Persephone, etc., we just wouldn't inflict it on a child.

The real problem with names is you never know if they'll start out fine and then become associated with something culturally crappy. My name is the coolest in the world but 1 year after I was born, someone with the same name became incredibly famous and a bit of a comic target and I was teased day in, day out cos of it. Still LOVE my name, though, even if still get the same comments occasionally. TYF's name was v unusual when he was born but it's become popular now and quite a few slebs have called their kids it (including a v chavvy one) and that drives him mad. You just gotta use good sense and taste and hope for the best

I bet 95% of people here have a Mum with one of the following names: Ann(e), Mary, Margaret, Pat/Trisha, Pamela, Susan, Christine, Barbara, Maureen, Sheila, Sylvia, Jane, Jean, Cath/Kath, etc.! My own dear Mama has 2 of 'em!

Ariesgirl · 28/02/2010 14:03

You forgot Linda! Loads of 50 and 60-something Lindas.

I love your chosen names. Lysander is a swoonsome Jilly Cooper character, and Orlando...well, need I say more? And Fabian makes me think of Frenchmen and sunlit courtyards, and expressos and trailing bourganvillia - or however you spell it - and balconies

My friend had a little girl they called Grace, which she wanted to change by deed poll after 6 months when they realised she (my friend) was 6 ft 1 and her boyf was 6 ft 4 and and little Grace was unlikely to be a floaty, graceful, girly little thing forever.

Scorpette · 28/02/2010 14:06

Sidney rocks! TYF hates all boys names, including his own, so, again, we need all girls. If only to stop FIL obsessively banging on about how his first grandson has to be called John Joseph (it's not his name nor that of TYF and his brothers, or FIL's father and GF, so wtf?). Ain't happening in a million years

Girls' names shouldn't be so sugary, IMHO (my name's quite 'strong'). Mind you, got chatting with a young couple and their baby at work, t'other day. Baby was dressed in grey jumper, brown cords, navy socks and black mini converse boots and gnawing a toy car and parents kept calling child Billy. When I said to kid 'you're a handsome one, aren't you?', they told me off in a massive strop 'cos Billy was 'obviously' a girl. I'm fully onboard the 'pink stinks' train, but I mean c'mon, give people a chance!

Sorry am writing so much - am bored and horny but TYF has been making fudge (he's quite the housewife). Much hilarity has ensued re: fudgepacking comments when he poured it into a tin to cool Small things... etc., etc.

Scorpette · 28/02/2010 14:11

How could I forget Linda?! My Mum has about 5 friends called Linda!

My Aunt gave my female cousins French names cos my Mum and Uncle are half-French, but she spelt one phonetically (my GPs apparently tried to politely get her to correct it, but no go). There's classy.

Ocarina · 28/02/2010 15:34

Yup, you got my Mum in that list. And round here most of that generation seem to be called Margaret or Mary.

I've avoided having conversations about names with TH, although I know what middle name I'd want for a boy or a girl. Part of me really likes Gaelic names, but then no-one can spell them.

Grrr to droid arrival Medee, I was so hoping to hear good news.

Muser · 28/02/2010 15:38

Nobody can spell or pronounce my name. It's fine, I just tell them.

GrumpyGasper · 28/02/2010 15:52

sorry medee. That's bollocks, what else can I say?

I am loving the names conversation and keeping an eye on your suggestions. polly I also like Hunter, but it really would not work with our surname. Might as well list the child in an outdoor clothing catalogue

And I have wanted Gaelic names all my life. Then I went and married a dyslexic Englishman - it's so not going to happen!

As you were - I am doing work . The 9-5 stuff has crept into my Sunday.

Headbanger · 28/02/2010 16:18

I HEART Mabel. It's a glorious name. But someone I know has just birthed a Mabel, so 'tis taken, the cow.

So I just POAS. 'Twas negative . The truly cruel thing is that when the piss first went up the stick two perfectly matched horizontal lines appeared in the windows, and I nearly passed out into the bath. Then I realised they were supposed to be the other way round, and sho nuff they faded leaving the one. I am having a large consoling glass of port (no gin, and left the 1979 brandy at a pal's house).

Ho hum. Period not acksherly due for 3 days but I think probably game over as I'm starting to get PMT stuff. I'm now dreading the next cycle of our own particular brand of ghastly conception problems (not actually SWIing owing to a range of factors I shan't bore you with now!).

Scorbulous, on this, as on so many things, you are of course correct. Sod this idiotic early testing business. Next time I shall just wait for the droid and if it seems late get the piss-sticks out.

I'll have a muffin now pliz.

Muser · 28/02/2010 17:18

I have two left, you nearly missed out Heads.

Fucksticks about droidness. We need some more damn baybees round here.

Ariesgirl · 28/02/2010 17:19

Poor Headbanger . Guess your ov-type pain was just something else. Definitely decided to never ever test early now.

By the way Muser, isn't your name really easy to pronounce - Mew-zer, like that? Have just been for solitary walk on beach and now am very up for some of those jammy muffins.

Scorpette · 28/02/2010 18:11

Headtheball, sorry about bfn and droidy ruminations It might just be too early to POAS If I am in any way wise about matters TTC, it's only a knowledge borne of bitter disappointment.

What's that, Jebus? You want me for a sunbeam?

Muesli, I guessed your pronunciation right I felt so brainy!

SomethingSuitablyWitty · 28/02/2010 18:15

Hey medee sorry about droid . It's particularly shit when it was feeling hopeful.

I'm enjoying the baby names talk and particularly liking Lipsy, but as Boyfy is foreign, I'll be restricted in my choices and all of the names I have ever liked will probably be out really. Meh, we'll find something.

I'm back from Dubrovnik. It's incredibly beautiful. T'was for work though, so I didn't get to swan around town much. I'd go back in a heartbeat, though it must be a tourist hell in the middle of the summer I'd say...

Ead - I like Ethel. It reminds of William's (as in Just William) haughty older sister. Speaking of which, Richmal anyone? Bet I could start a thread on it here and find plenty who LOVE it!

SomethingSuitablyWitty · 28/02/2010 18:19

PS - totally missed out an entire page there. Head sorry for negative test.... All sounds a bit weird with the lines appearing and disappearing. Bah, it's shit anyway. I read your post a bit quick and was stuck wondering "why on earth would she test in the bath? A bit gross surely and very dilute... " - but figured it out on a second reading.

Headbanger · 28/02/2010 18:46

Fanks for being nice BESHes .

Might still be too early. But I'm resigning myself, so as not to do the silly rollercoastering at which I am so adept. I risk an ulcer, else. Am bucking self up.

Medee · 28/02/2010 19:45

bah to more negatives.

I'm on full red tide stage, so no denying it now. I do now have Agnus Whatsit, and a glass of wine to compensate. Debating now whether to fire up the CBFM, or not to bother until my next cycle when I actually start trying again. For - would help me to understand what's going on. Against - when I start getting "you're fertile now" messages I might not be able to resist SWIng.

Muser · 28/02/2010 21:29

Oh stupid droid Medee.

Don't know what to advise on the CFBM. If you really don't want to try at all then maybe have this month off completely. It might be good to have a month where you don't think about your cycle at all, if that's even possible.

Medee · 28/02/2010 21:56

I think you are right, but I am now swaying towards, I should just start it anyway, rather than get halfway through and regret not starting it. Bah, why is this so hard!

laurielou · 01/03/2010 08:26

Morning BESHlets.

cokie that's fantastic news, well done you.

head, medee I feel your droid pain, mine too arrived Sat am. I feel such a nob, really had a good feeling this month. Spent most of the weekend just wallowing. Most months I think ho hum & get on with it, then sometimes it hits me like a fucking sledgehammer. This is one such month.

So, on to our appointment at the Assisted Reproduction Unit on Thurs. Instead of feeling positive (BAH!) that we're doing something active I just feel a total failure. Anyone else who's "having assistance" feel like that? The stoopid thing is I don't see anyone else as a failure for having some kind of assistance, if anything I think they're incredibly brave. So why do I have a different set of rules for me?

I'm taking out a 2 week rental on the Pit of Dispair. Have been to Tesco & stocked up on crap food & alcohol to keep me going. One bucket for pee, one for t'other. Am staying in the same pj's. I wouldn't come near if I were you.

I suppose I should be glad droid arrived early (by my standards anyway) so as not to prolong the hope. Had a perfect 28 days cycle (usually 32/33 days). 28 day cycles also mean droid due to arrive right in the middle of camping hell at Glastonbury. FUCK SHIT BOLLOCKS WANK.

I could go on and on.

BrassicaBabe · 01/03/2010 08:57

What about Cordelia folks?

And my tip for a smiley sunny "all is good with the world" Monday morning? A good ol'shaggin' on a Sunday night!!

Sorry bout all the droids of doom.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is not accepting new messages.