30s TTC - Butterdish Smashing World Record Attempt

[PollyPoo]

Line up, line up for the world record attempt for most dropped butterdishes per fred.

The bar is here, along with squishy sofas, some fluffy beanbags, low lighting, and most important of all, free booze.

I have installed some naked waiters (Morgan from being human, together with Russell Howard) - they have trays of champagne cocktails that can never run out, so dig in laydeez and lets make this a fred to remember.

ffs chocho - have just read that condescending shit. Maybe you should've put TMI in the title and sprinkled some babydust and ickle angle baybee emoticons. Twats.

Oooh we're on a TTC board - let's not talk about JIZZ because it might offend someone. Fuck me if they find out they have to put the jizz IN the foofoo!

I didn't get bleeding gums when diffed, but my teeth seemed to move apart slightly, even tho' v. early in pregnancy....flossing became less of a struggle, but it felt freaky! I guess that gums must get affected fairly early on.

Tee hee, as you can see I am keeping a dignified silense...perhaps the issue is because I shortened the word, and should have used jism or jizzum instead, maybe I should go back and ask for the correct spelling.

I can't imagine that anyone would consider it their place to tell me off!

Yikes at the thought of moving teeth. But admiring of the high level of dental hygiene that the casual mention of flossing seems to suggest. Sorry to hear your clinic is so utterly shite though Cho. I suppose you have to keep calling and try to be as overbearing as you can ? I work in open space so calling doctors is a horror of lurking out in corridors with my mobile. Hope it's easier for you. Sorry not to have any better ideas...

Feeling quite proud of my "symptom" now, with the encouragement - anything to fan the flames of the craziness

Silence, ffs (God, it's like the jizz thing all over again)

Hi IttyBitty, yes, you can always be assured of someone to assist you in the woofling here...I always keep dental floss on the coffee table...otherwise I would never remember, or be bothered!

...yes, with clinic I know I have to keep on at them all the time, I don't want to become a nightmare or be rude, but sometimes you do need to be forceful...I normally say to the person I'm emailing that I'd really sppreciate their support in resolving the problems, becuase it's making me a bit anxious and worried that time is passing by...appeal to their sympathy

Normally they respond kindly, though I am sure that they still think I'm a pita, but at least I am not venting my spleen on someone that has no control on the situation.

Ski...I think some of those laydeez would need to carry a perfumed hanky under their nose just to click on the 'Conception' title

Ah, have only recently comprehended today is Scromptious's treatment day. Luck and fondles, Scorps.

Cho, ha ha, I've been over to fan the jizzy flames!

Perhaps everyone outside the Palace only does Scorps-style sex speak? "I would be most obliged if you would insert your penis in my vagina. Many thanks" etc.

Talk about the BESH/PESHies closing ranks - have just been over the StickyJizzGate fred & have ended up snorting coffee out my nose onto my keyboard.

Absolute pure class. cho you must win an award for the most fabulous OP (lifts cho up on shoulders to parade through the streets).

Have never really inspected the boyf's get-jizzy-wiv-it. Me thinks that's tonight's task. Well, helps the winter nights fly by.....

How many boy's jizz does one need to inspect before one becomes an expert in viscosity chocho?

About 20 IMHO ahem pass the spitoon and dental floss...

...just tried to lure Victoria Coren into the palace...

can someone oil the shackles in the dungeon and get out the flesh hooks please...we want to impress her!

Lycra, just because one has to debase oneself saying such filth to one's partner doesn't mean one should discuss such disgustingness in a public forum

Ha! Scorps: sounds like it was straightforward and reassuring! Glad to hear it. I truly hate these kind of procedures, so well done on getting it done and dusted. It?s all good. Think my own deepseated discomfort possibly dates back to the time my gynae (a woman at that time) breezily suggested a breast check after doing a smear. So, I had to take off all remaining items of clothing . I was lost in the horror of total nakedness on the examinination chair thing - and this was the moment she chose to launch into some chit-chat about my holiday plans. Oh the humanity.

Glad it all went ok scrapie and good that you had a chat about other ishoos too. Now what you need is some anxiety-mamanagement techniques.

Scorps...methinks perhaps tis the bukakke that is at the root of the problem - how is one to identify one's preferred jizz?

Glad to hear the 'procedure' went well - back to woofl-bagging!

Well done Scorps, good news.

Humpy are you around? I got the parcel today, thank you! I am looking forward to getting Iris to sleep this avo so I can put feet up and read.

Well I have made it to CD24 so far without sign of bleepy metal fucker, which for me is pretty damn good! D'herbs and needles are working, all is right with the world.

Chars, Cunticles! Eagerly await names of books that help me stop being such a nervous nelly ('Get a fucking grip' by Dr Anne Zyetti, etc,). Or you might need to come to mine and beat me with a blunt piece of wood, repeatedly screaming 'snap out of it!' at me until I lose consciousness.

TWitty, worst thing about last smear was Dr obsessively talking about fucking Avatar. I dunno why they think it's helpful. This Dr just talked to me about my gynae health and ttc, which was good as it was both relevant and distracting.

Left bukkake comment on jizzfred. My bad.

Am worried at how easily I find inventing great porn titles

Another vocational option perhaps scrapes. Work from home, utilise talent, indulge fantasies, make loads of money. What's not to love?

Poo, am allowing self to get quietly excited for your long 'nuff LP Come on, LP, do it for the BESHes!

Possible comma overuse there. Off to self-flagelate

Have just googled bukakke.

Am shocked at you people .

Surely its bad enough dealing with jizz in order to get diffed.... But dealing with jizz because you LIKE it????

Eeeewwwww

Well done on being so brave Scorps! Onwards and diffwards!

Cockermouth I am now sniggering at the thought that the internet police will have you marked out as some juvenile acne-ridden boy sitting in his room gooling dirty words ...why not try 'wolfbagging'?