Hello ladies,
So sorry I've been a bit quiet - busy, and a few ups and downs. Was a bit gutted, somehow, when I got my AF for the last time before IVF - in part because I'd had this secret and totally irrational hope/feeling that we might just do it on that last cycle. But should be pleased really that there is some action to be taken at last. To that end, I went to the clinic today and picked up my enormous purple bag full of medicines - it's actually huge, as it contains a box for discarding sharps (used needles, oh yes, I've got all the lingo now). I should start injecting for the 'down-regging' (when they provoke a temporary menopause - what fun...) around 23rd March - I've opted for injections rather than a nasal spray, rather to their surprise, as I would prefer to stick needles into myself than spray stuff up my nose, and it seems a little more certain you're delivering the right dosage. Haven't actually tried yet, obviously, but I'm pretty mellow about needles (piece of cake, right, confused!).
The weirdest thing about this limbo is that we're NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING UNPROTECTED SEX!!! They obviously have to make sure I'm not pregnant when I start the down-regging, but it does seem a little crazy. Haven't bought condoms for a loooong time. Still, better show willing and reassure DH that we can and will have sex without the sole purpose of procreating...
Otherwise things a little fraught - my dad has been diagnosed with bladder cancer. They've caught it really early, and should be able to blitz it with targeted chemo, and are even talking about a possible 'cure' (and even if it reoccurs it can be managed pretty well). But somehow the 'c' word is still scary. But I know (and we all do on here) how lucky he and my family is that it was caught relatively early. It's slightly tricky to know how concerned to be, and in particular how much I should be talking to my parents over and above the normal. I get the feeling they want to carry on as normal, and there's no reason not to for the moment, but I don't want them to feel I'm just ignoring it, or not taking seriously the anxiety they are inevitably feeling, or for that matter what my dad has been through in terms of surgery etc. and has ahead of him - though the chemo is localized and absolutely nothing like the usual horrible stuff.
Anyway, quite enough from me. How are you feeling, YTD?! Hope you're not getting too exhausted. And all good wishes for your friend and her baby - sounds scary, though basically ok, thankfully. My sister was 5lb 4, like confused, and I was 5lb 7 (my mother doesn't eat, basically!) and we're both strapping women now! [Looks at impossible-to-shift belly ruefully...]
HP, HP! That is so exciting!! And from my perspective at least so nice of your DH to take some responsibility onto himself and own this (in the horrible jargon of the day) as his decision too. At least I hope it felt like that. I just wish my DH would be like that and actually make some sort of positive statement - it would make it so much easier for me to press on with all this. (I can't complain though, really - he's stopped whingeing, which is pretty good in itself, and even made some observation about not booking to go away before Christmas as I may not be up to too much travel.) Anyway, v. best of luck with the first (big) step. I will probably be around tomorrow night so will look in and wave encouragingly.
Congrats too, lq (can't remember if I said that already) - you didn't dither long on the ditherers' thread! It is bananas that we've got two BFPs in such quick succession.
Hope you're doing ok, Suerock - all sounds very tough at the moment. I feel the same about working - though as you say am full of admiration for those (of either sex) who stay at home with their kids - that is really hardcore hard work. And very valuable. I am still in complete career turmoil, trying to decide whether or not to leave my current job, and jettison/waste all the years of education and temporary jobs and poverty and crap that it took to get here. But I know I'm lucky to (currently) have some degree of choice. And I know those choices (if they even exist - the alternatives being rather speculative) will diminish dramatically once I have a kid. It's such an old-fashioned, bra-burning feminist word, but it basically is bloody patriarchy (without any hostility meant to most of the individual men I know).
Am crossing everything for a quick and satisfactory (or more than) house sale, confused - the market is a bit slow at present, but people do know a good thing when they see it, and I'm sure the right person will come along soon.
OK, bet you're wishing I had kept schtum now! Sorry for the mammoth post. Lovely to catch up with you all, though, and will keep you posted, probably in horrible detail knowing me, about the fun few weeks I have ahead!