30s TTC - After all, we're not nice 'down there' at the BESH of times...

[CUNextTuesday]

Yey! Well DONE gasper!!

A different type of madness will now ensue!!

Been feeling crampy for a week now

Hope this isn't just "normal" for me. Would be pretty irritated to get cramps for a week and sore boobs every month.

Oh well, could be worse.

Well... I'm 2WOOFLing but I've had sore boobs for the first time evah and haven't made it past 9pm for a week, last night was a new record - asleep on the sofa by 8pm and I didn't even work yesterday. I'm CD26/26 today. My nips are still on fire and jailbait says they look darker.

Oh ski that does sound positive. Sorry to say it, but there you go.

I'm just off to the loo as really quite crampy hurt so just checking I don't need to protect my knickers

I did.

CurlyCurlyCurly! Go girl! Time for another naked dance of joy!

Hooray Hooray! That it the fabbest of newses. Bollytime!

carrots I yearn for a life where I can go to the loo every day without sticking a finger up my foofoo for any signs. Signs? What am I expected? Teeth? Someone to grab my finger with their teeny-tiny hands. If I'm not positive this month then I'm putting myself forward for the worst case of YBIFWY. Does this mean you're out? Or is it fake droid like Curly's?

Carrotty - bugger. Bastard druid.

ski tell me about it. Seems like full on proper droid given abdo pains with a vengeance. Will know later today of course when my pad overflows into my undies. Sorry. Had a chat with YOB, made me feel better and made me laff over his ideas for next time (sperm with little cameras were one idea so they would know where to go )

VAG, cheers.

Carrots, Sperm in the foofoo not the bumsex.

Oops sorry, realised I'm put a downer on cassie's news but it's actually so nice that you made it, C, it made my fail not so bad, so un-BESHy hugs.

ski damn damn DAMN why didn't you tell me that earlier?

Carrots so sorry about the little metal fucker. Here you go...

Am I too late for the neked dancing?!

Iggy are sure the wild look in fite club Brad's eyes is not him manically looking for an escape route? If so, tighten the manacles.

Thanks polly

OK, I am going to be really positive about this.

I can now chart this month properly with a thermom which works. I am going to spend the next month increasing my exercise and shedding a few pounds by eating better (apart from self-cheering-up cake I just scoffed ).

I'm ok. Very disappointed but as Gin said recently, it's only the first month.

Absinthe all round it is - other than those of us who are TTC. Oh. Ok well anyone for orange juice?

Very good stiff upper lip ole girl. Have a manly punch to the shoulder. (and I will sneak in a quick grope whilst at it.)

Yay, virtual absinthe for all! Perhaps I will just have the usual pint of gin instead

sory rots and defo not putting a downer on me. I feel bad in the opposite way IYSWIM. Loving the positive slant now, but gonna give you a girly hug anyway. {smile]

Poor Carrots Here, have a wellie filled with gin and think about all the lovely satnav-sperm foofoo sex you can have next cycle.

I just thought - if I don't drink in RL, can I still drink in the Gin Palace? Because I could do with getting virtually-ratarsed today. Just feeling great babyfail sadness.

Thanks y'all. Feeling all luuuurved up and groped a bit too (squeak).

Just a brief dip back into the religion debate. I have absolute proof of the non-existence of God. Noone could be mean enough to give droid pains at the same time as babyfail. Still, off to church on Sunday as it's give a child with nothing a show box day and I have - a shoe box! Hurrah.

Must must must do some work. I spend far too much time in here.

Did I mention I ironed my tummy?

show shoe. Fuck.

Denise Van Outen is pregnant. She is 35 and is a cougar - how DARE she updiff before me? I find her coarse and over-rated.

Heh! I was recently introduced to the term "cougar" and I like to think it gives me something to aim for. Sequinned kaftans, here I come.

Is it Josephwhatshisname's baby?

In contrast, scorps, she speaks very highly of you

Bad news rots, although you are aware that had you got diffed straight away at first go you would have been sent to the Deeply Unpopular Room to sit with Jeremy Clarkson and Piers Morgan. It is totally verboten to Diff First Time Only joking - lots of luck for next time round - let the madness commence!

cunty speaks da troof - it would've been deeply suspicious of you to have diffed first time out of the box. We'd all have had to make snide anonymous remarks about you simply pretending to be a BESH for the xmas pressie.

carrots top marks for super-positive attitude! I do understand that just cos it's 1st month doesn't mean it's not disappointing.

Maybe follow skisexdoctor's advice next month eh?

well I just tried to sleep while mai napped and still feel rubbish. Looked at test again and convinced there was summat there but is v like the clearblue one that was load of bollocks. Is a new boots 'early testing' one. Wouldn't have bought if knew it was blue dye. Read a lit bout blue dye ones since the last weird result,and although I know from experience that a strong positive is obvious,there are all sorts of issues with evaps,leaky dye etc. So am not putting any faith in what doesn'yt really look like a line anyway.

Have to somehow drag myself n mooch to the shops.