Mid 30's TTC - you're my BESH mate you are..... <hic>

[triggerhappybaby]

We've taken delivery of a fine new sofa. Come and rest here

Cosmosis is a REAL lady! swoons

hello. I'm in my early 30s but ttc - can I join you? Just got my period this morning so a bit

ha Bessie123 - ladies, ladeez - look - we've snared another one!

Bessie - we'll need the following questions answered:

i) own any cats?
ii) like gin?
iii) evil career-chasing foe of Daily Mail?
iv) OH - toy boy or sensible older fella?
v) if you were to be a lesbian for a day - who would your secret ladylust be?
vi) Secret lush of shame?

Welcome, we're all nice here. We don't do cutesy acronyms, a CD1 will bring you a hearty punch to the shoulder rather than sprinklings of babydust. We did have some babydust but the ex-ravers snorted it all.

lush = lust obviously - for any difference it might make.

ski lust+crush=lush

so that made perfect sense.

Bessie welcome.here's a slighly chewed biro to fill in ski's questionaire...and here's a long island iced tea.(as VAG mentioned recently,tea is a proper morning drink and this is therefore thoroughly acceptable)

Skihorse

um...

1)) own any cats?
no, but I have been campaigning for one to catch the marauding army of mice rampaging through our house every winter (nice, i know)

ii) like gin?
LOVE gin and come from a long line of boozers

iii) evil career-chasing foe of Daily Mail?
For sure. I am a bit dismayed at how popular the daily mail is on here; all threads about anything in the news seem to link to it...

iv) OH - toy boy or sensible older fella?
hmm, well OH is (a lot) older than me but his mental age is probably about 5

v) if you were to be a lesbian for a day - who would your secret ladylust be?
Chloe Sevigny.

vi) Secret lush of shame?
oh, kevin spacey. I know he is a gay but i just like him.

Can I play on the thread now?

ginhag - thankyou, but I am a bit worried about the coca cola in the long island iced tea - isn't caffeine bad?

We need to caffeine to get over the hangovers.

bessie drinking anything but slimline water is bad - so you may as well have whatever you like. Blue cheese chaser with that?

Mice are pets - that's good - we like pets.

ah, i hadn't considered that, cosmosis. so the 3 cappucinos I had this morning are actually ok, then?

3 is actually rather restrained.

That's just reminded me - when I was at the beach the other week I'd go to a beach cafe for a nice coffee - always served with a Baileys - even before 11am. bliss.

Scorpette - someone is looking for a fight with you!

cos dildocam sounds like an utterly weird experience.I've had several internal scans in the past,and once had a nurse shine a proper maintenance man type torch up me fanjo as the proper hospital lights weren't working so I know something of the indignity of the whole thing...really hope ya get some answers from it.

Also ooo you are a real human,nice pic!I have a (fairly old) pic of me and mani the small on my profile page.it's a rubbish photo but proves I exist.haven't updated for ages except for 1 pic of mani being a duuuude in sunglasses.

Oh and welcome bessie another nice daytimey type drink.

Whoa whoa WHOA!! Back up.... Kevin Spacey is GAY?????

beshie if that is the only contribution you have to make to this thread, i.e. bursting other people's balloons I suggest you turn on your heel and get the hell outta here from whence you came

That has almost ruined my day. I shan't be able to work now this afternoon. Please please don't tell me I am the only one who didn't know that?? Like my gaydar is broken or something??

( P.S. Beshie )

Welcome to Bessie! Though Kevin Spacey isn't really weird enough for a secret crush - surely there's something more hideous lurking in your subconscious? Is it a deep longing for Ann Widdecombe?

gin - argh, you are real too! And not haggish or puddingy at all.

trog - heh! he's the campest camper int he campsite, how did you not see that? though still rather too attractive to be a secret COS.

trog hehe yep, you're the only one who didn't know - in fact it's rumoured he's indulged in homo-erotic bliss with none other than Mandy Mandleson! Still got a wide-on for him?

How's your uterus these days anyway m'dear? Have you emptied it out fully now? Any more doc's tests to be done?

Oh, and as we've been speaking of men who hold women back from motherhood. I have a dear, dear friend who is 3 years older than me, this makes her BOD+3. When she was 32 she met a pure chain-smoking, alcoholic cunt of a man. He told me he had a child in Edinburgh whom he'd never seen (it'd now be a teen) - when she asked him about this child he said I'd lied and that he had no child. She told me it was "probably her last chance at motherhood and/or happiness". Anyway, they married and apparently he has kicked the fags & booze on the head, however yesterday I told her I'd dreamt she had a little boy. She got quite upset and told me that one day "maybe they'd try" and she wished it could be now. He is soooooo the type to be saying "next year baby", "when we have more money baby", "when I've been to x country baby". Tosser.

Nice one ski, not only has my balloon been burst, you've now flicked the remains at my forehead. Cheers.

Withered sac of doom now pristine thanks. And will be so till at least December. Am officially 'resting'

Thanks ski (I noticed your sarky comment on there earlier, which she seems to not have got) - nobody messes with Da Scorp.

Annoying chip-on-shoulder MN dumbo: sorted (I was really restrained an' shit).
POAS: BFNYBOB (big fat no, you barren old bitch). Shall hang my head in shame at own hysteria and go back to making myself infertile with the stress of worrying about being infertile.
Kevin Spacey: not gay - has a gf. Let everyone think he was cos he felt that if he squashed rumours he'd look homophobic or something like that.
Dildocam: That's all I can say: Just hope it'll be helpful and worth it!

I didn't get a chewed fucking biro, you shower of bastards! I had to use my own pen. Mind you, that was before we got the funding for the magnificent revamped Gin Palace we see before us now.

Anyway, my fellow BESHettes, rejoice, for I have found a solution to all fertility problems:
www.kadir-buxton.com/page3.htm

Then, when you're knocked up and ready to pop, he can help with that too!
www.kadir-buxton.com/page12.htm

WARNING! If you amongst others whilst reading, try not to bellow out loud...

Scorpette Crikey - she's really got it in for you. Have you let it be said in public that you eat cured meats/babies whilst wearing fur and stealing husbands?

Wow, I usually get ridiculed for my kevin spacey crush, i'm feeling right at home here amongst you all, with your inappropriate rantings.

Scorpette - could you have a go at George Clooney's cover story as well?

Oh for fuck's SAKE. I'm in too bad a mood to deal with people who are humourless and take everything you say the wrong way.

ski What's that you're saying? Here, d'you want the leg? I find 'em a bit tough after 5 months. God, it's hot in this mink.

at scorp's choice of summer clothing