Start clomid tomorrow. Just read leaflet and I'm scared

[summermagic]

Hello

This is my first post on Mumsnet although I've been reading the conception threads avidly.

I'm due to start Clomid tomorrow and I've just been reading the lengthy side effects and now I've gone from excited to really scared.

Are they really that bad? I'm having visions of myself in a darkened room with pencils up my nose!

Any reasurances would be greatly appreciated. Headaches and hot flushes I can cope with. Insanity I can't.

OH MY GOD RAY!!!!!!

I have never met you and have only been communicating with you on MN for a month but I am literally sitting at my desk in work with tears streaming down my face.

Congratulations that's such brilliant news. I'm so so delighted for you. How early did you test? Were you due today? Oh my God Oh my God Oh my God - that is just so amazing.

I've been on a course in London over the past few days and I'm telling you someone is playing nasty tricks on me at the moment.

I've got a bit of a cold which is making me feel really sick on and off all day and is giving me a horrible taste in my mouth. My boobs are hurting, I'm constipated, weeing more than usual (though not as much as before), emotional and tired but every single one of those symptoms can be explained by other things.

• I do sometimes feel sick and have a funny taste in my mouth when I have a cold.
• Sore boobs and emotional probably AF
• Weeing and dry spartan CM could be clomid
• Tiredness probably due to lack of sleep.

Agghhh. I feel like someone/something is just doing it's best to make things even more complicated for me this month. Oh well we'll soon see.

Ray - whatever happens you've given us all a massive amount of hope. I'm just so excited for you. Don't desert us all for the July babies thread completely. xxx

Issy and Vicks - we'll get there. xxx

Hi guys.

I'm so sorry to be miserable today, but am feeling crap I thought I'd share with you guys, I hope that's OK.

I have done another test today and still a negative so no BFP for me this month. Still a few days before I am due on, but don't feel any different really.

My partner has just been diagnosed with hypothyroidism (basically means he puts on weight easily, has sore joints and sleeps all the time, also, has no sex drive.) We have only been on clomid a month, but I think we'll have to take a break, I think it's putting too much pressure on us.

I am really sad, because I want to carry on, but I know a break would be better for DP. The clinic have said they'll let us have a three month break, and then we can start again. Just seems like a very long time right now. I am so sorry to moan, especially considering the great news we've had over the last day or so, hopefully I can return to my normal cheerful self soon.

SM-You're symptoms sound positive I think, maybe you'll be BFP no.2 this month!! Fingers crossed x

Ray-How you feeling now? Ok I hope x

Issey-Us soon eh? x

Hi Vics - so sorry to hear about your dp - hope they can sort out suitable treatment quickly. It's still not too late for this cycle and some women get pregnant after stopping clomid as it triggers the ovaries to start working properly, so don't give up hope. 3 months must feel like forever, but try and plan something brilliant that you can't do if you're pg. My friend went on a horse riding holiday across a desert somewhere exotic after her miscarriage as she was told to wait three months before trying again and she had given up riding when she was pg. And to give you more hope she's now 14 weeks pg - took her 18 months of trying in all and she was on and off steroids that meant she couldn't try for some of that time but she got there in the end (she's 37 too).

Summermagic - your symptoms sound hopeful but I know what you mean about attributing them to something else. I have been nauseous, esp. car sickness, had needle-like sharp cramps since I ov'd and (TMI warning) had the abundant white cm but they could be the hcg - and have subsided today so even more likely. Cramps could also be slight constipation and nausea could be that I'm eating really late cos I keep spending too long on here or that I drive too fast anyway when I don't have passengers. Almost tested today, but stopped myself at the last minute as only 9 days since hcg so no point. Tomorrow is the day when it should be -ve and am tempted to test. But then if it's still positive I'll be tempted to keep testing and don't want to do that to myself again, but then if I don't then I'll not know whether any future positive is a real one - dilemma time.

Egypt - thanks for your positive story.

Ray - now you have me obsessing over my ankles, where is it I should be looking? I read near the ankle bone on the inside of the foot, but is there something more specific than that? And congrats again - so happy for you.

Think my not symptom spotting has gone shooting out of the window!!!

Hi all,

AF arrived this morning for me Trying to put on a happy face for work. Hope you all have a better day, V x

Thinking of you Vicks. Lock youself in a room and let it all out then buy yourself a massive bar of chocolate.

Don't give up. I know it feels like years now but why not take it one month at a time. Things might have settled down a bit in a month or so and you can look at it afresh with new eyes and in the meantime you can both focus on getting super super pregnant.

Ray - you ok?

Still feeling sickish today but no change in ankle so convinced I can't be pregnant. Am totally dreading the arrival of AF because right up until then you can daydream. Had horrible dreams last night that all these middle aged ladies I know where pregnant and delighted and I was the only one that wasn't. xx

Sorry AF got you Vics .

I caved in and tested (with an internet cheapie 25mIU test) and it was -ve so hcg shot is out of my system. But now I think am not pg as last month I kept testing positive until 13 days after the injection. At least I can now try not to test until next Wednesday, knowing that I've already had a negative.

Good luck summermagic. How are your symptoms today? My symptoms are:

• still a little nauseous and light headed but I think I'm coming down with a cold.

• a strange menthol smell to my unperfumed shower gel that I've been using for years and never noticed before. I have recently started a new bottle though and I couldn't smell it this morning, but the ingredients list hasn't changed, and I've noticed it for previous three days.

• an odd rash on my skin which I only notice when I'm in (or just out of) the shower - probably just the time of year making my skin drier.

• twinges in my stomach last night, but today I have twinges in my back just below the waist and in my thigh so probably just fighting a cold virus.

-alternating between feeling ravenous and having no appetite.

This ttc lark really does make you over analyse everything doesn't it?

Hi guys, thanks for words of support. We have contacted the clinic and have asked to be put on a three month 'watch and wait'. That means we don't have to be referred again and can pick up exactly where we left off.

I symptom spot too, and I think you can drive yourself round the twist with it!! But all your symptoms sound positive

I have been to my mates house for tea this evening and decided that I must redecorate the house! DP is thrilled, he pulled this face when I told him !

Love to you all, thanks again for encouragement.

Vic x

Oh, and Issey, my sister in law is pregnant and she had the 'ravenous one minute and no apetite the next' thing, started about three days before she found out. Hope that helps! x

Vic - thanks for giving me some much needed positivity. Really hope things work out for you soon.

Summermagic - we cross posted earlier so sorry if it seemed I had ignored your post. Sorry you had that horrible dream. Fingers crossed your nausea will turn out to be a BFP.

I'm feeling quite sick this evening and am trying to convince myself that I have the ankle thing, but I don't even know if I'm looking in the right place and there's a nagging voice in my head saying 'they always look like that' . I'm also having some vision problems - almost like I'm looking through a haze - if it was the beginning of the cycle I'd think it was a clomid side effect. It's probably just the way central heating changes the air. Also the slightest thing is making me exhausted and breathless. Yesterday it was just hanging out washing and today going upstairs to get my temps to input into ff. Just as well my dance teacher cancelled my lesson tonight - I'd have struggled with the rumba never mind a jive.

Summermagic - just looked at your profile - being nosey - and noticed you're from Cardiff. I grew up in Cwmbran/Pontypool.

Summermagic - it's the big day for you today isn't it? Hope AF stays away and you get that BFP you've been waiting for. Good Luck x.

Thanks Issy. No AF yet and just poked boobs to check they're still sore and they are but have now convinced myself that all this is is a long luteal phase and AF will arrive over the next few days.

I am literally driving myself mad but can not bring myself to test. I've got a baby angel on one shoulder saying "These symptoms are real. You should have had your period by now and your boobs never usually feel this sore". But I've also got a baby devil on the other saying "Don't be ridiculous. You think this every time and you're always wrong. You're just working youself up to a massive fall and you're prpbably only late because you're wishin it away.".

Well I'm still not testing until Monday (Sunday on the outside). I do get long luteal phases so it really wouldn't be out of the ordinary for me to just get my period in the next few days.

Issy - we're practically old neighbours. Your symptoms sound positive for this month too.

Vicks - hope you're putting all your efforts in to transforming your home in to something out of Living etc.

Ray - were are you? Neeeeeeeeed an update.

Hi guys,

so so sorry that i havent been on for a few days, to say things have been manic is unbelievable. Still on cloud nine but trying so very hard to keep my feet on the ground not working though.

Summer magic, your symptoms sound promising i am so keeping my fingers crossed for you.
Went to the docs today and they have sent off an urgent referral to the hospital so that i can have an early scan and check everything is ok and how many there are !!!! i'm so worried will get there and there will be nothing but just irrational fears surely.
I have another prob as have a condition which i have been taking painkillers for. Now call me naive but i thought i could just stop taking them but apperantly not so i have to be weened off them over the next few weeks and that is worrying me sick. God the things to think about.
I tested 4 days early and the test was positive so im taking that as a very good sign as you can image have done another 3 tests since and all still positive so keeping fingers crossed and have been praying alot.

Vics- so sorry Af got you what a shit.

Issy- the foot thing was below my ankle on the bridge of my foot but at the side and on the other foot it is just to the side of the ankle towards the heel that it is swollen. i also have a vein just to the side of the ankle thats pulsing and i am convincing myself its the heart beat how silly is that!!!!

I am keeping my fingers crossed and sending lots and lots of baby dust to you all. Lets hope it comes in threes and it is me, summer magic and issy. Oh i do so hope so please please let it be.

and guys thanks so much for all you support and to you summer magic. Does this sound silly but i feel that we have made a connection this month i do so hope for the best for you .

Well have to get my little missy from Gym now so i'll log back on later if i can if nit will be on tomorrow to check updates.

Good luck guys and lets pray my bean decides to stay where it is.

Hi guys,

Ray - all good stuff! Keep thinking happy relaxing thoughts!

Summer - fingers and all crossed for you, let us know!

Issey and Summer - I have never heard of this foot thing, where did you find out about it?

Feelin a bit better today. Stopped glaring at every pregnant woman I see, so that's a bonus eh?!

Thanks for heaps of support, V x x x

Ray - lovely to hear from you - I can totally understand why you've been away for a couple days. Glad you're getting an early scan - it will be so reassuring for you to see that heartbeat. I'm really glad I get one as part of my treatment, when I eventually join you. I agree with your feelings about this thread too, it's a really nice one. I also think that you and I may have more in common based on an earlier post you made.

I think I might have those swellings on my feet - trouble is I've never really looked that closely at my feet before and I'm probably imagining it - certainly no pulsing veins. I have been feeling really sick all day today though, but that's proabably a cold. Baby devils and angels on my shoulders too summermagic .

Vics - it was Ray who mentioned the foot thing earlier on this thread.

Really hope you have an exceedingly sticky bean Ray, a bfp tomorrow summermagic and a bfp next time you try Vics.

God - when is it going to stop being bloody Friday? Feel like this day has gone on forever. Can't tell you how many loo visits I've made today in my paranoia that I'm sensing AF's arrival.

Ray - so good to hear you're doing well. Bet you must be suppressing the overwhelming desire to stand on a chair and shout "I AM PREGNANT" at the top of your lungs. What are your symptoms at this point? Don't worry too much about the painkillers thing. I had to take yellow fever injections when I was pregnant and I know a few girls who had to take strong anti-depressants all the way through their pregnancies and their little ones are fine.

Still no ankle symptoms but I did find a strongly pulsating vein behind my ear that I've never noticed before the other day.

My darling boy is very poorly with conjunctivitis and a cold at the moment. Just checked on him and his hair is plastered to his face and his pjs are all damp. Poor little fella. Keeps telling me he's "not velly well".

Issy - loads of ladies on that twoweekwait website I've been looking at seem to have colds just before they get a bfp. They do say that your immunity is lower during pregnancy don't they???

Off to bed now. Pleeeeeeeeeeease don't let AF arrive overnight. God I don't know what I would have done without this thread in the last month. Thank you. x

Really keeping my fingers crossed for you summermagic. Hope your ds gets better soon too.

Caved in this morning. BFN .

I know it's still early and a test the strength I used would only pick up around 52% of pregnancies at day -4, but still feel sad and really feel like it's not worked for me this time now. I'm still undecided about whether it's better to be let down gently by testing early and hoping you could be in that 48%/13%/3% or get the crushing blow of that temperature drop at day -1.

Need to pick myself up as out tonight and need to shop for winter shoes that go with summer clothes to wear for my cousin's wedding next Saturday.

Hi ladies

Issy - don't give up just yet. 48% is still good odds. It's terrible how we torture ourselves though isn't it. Hope your retail therapy took your mind off it a bit and that you've bought youselves some fabulous shoes.

Woke up with dull ache in my legs, back and tummy during the night and again this morning and thought that my boobs had stop aching overnight. Felt absolutely shit at thought that I'd imagined all this and took my temp which was (if I kept themometer in for ages) 36.7. I don't know much about temping but my friend told me that preg tempratures are about 37 so took that as another indication that I'm not.

Sore boobs back now, aching has diminished and as to this very moment AF has still not arrived. Still can't bring myself to test though as have realised that I do have 32 to 42 day cycles when not on clomid so could be just that this is a longish cycle too.

Hope you're all having nice weekends. x

Thanks summermagic. I would give the same advice to anyone else who tested so early, but it's harder to believe your own advice isn't it?

Temps vary from woman to woman. My temps have never been over 37 even when I was pg. 36.64 is about as high as mine have ever got - except when I had flu. My coverline is about 36.15.

Am amazed at your stamina in not testing, wish I could be like that. your signs are so hopeful too. Really want to hear that you have that BFP when you do.

Very unsuccessful shopping trip, will have to try again tomorrow. Best get ready to go out now.

It's not stamina it's fear. Prefere to be on that tightrope between yes and no rather than risk a definate no and feel terrible.

Even starting to think I'll wait til day 35 (32 now) to see if AF arrives before doing anything now because I looked through my diary and that seems to be my average length without clomid. Surely clomid would bring it a bit more forward wouldn't it?

Sorry if I'm being irritating. I'm irritating myself!

Hope you had a nice time last night Issy and your second shopping trip is a bit more successful.

Ray - when is your scan.

Hope you're feeling ok Vicks

Hi guys,

sorry for your BFN issy what a bummer but remember its early days so still could be.

Summer magic,

Not sure when scan is yet as they havent called me to confirm but doc said normally happens within 10 days so hopefully by the end of next week. Once ive has scan and they confirm all seems ok i can then relax.
Speaking to God alot at the moment and praying that all stays ok i dis another test yesterday which was when i was probably due on CD32 and it came up within seconds and was very strong so taking comfort in that. When i had MC i was a week late and the test was so faint so indicated hormones were low where asd this time they seem to be high which is so good. BB are so sore can hardly touch them and feeling tired in the evenings felt sick last night but thinking could be in my head at this stage as normally sickness doesnt kick in til 6 weeks.

I still cant quite beleive it guys feel like i am in a dream world, it takes alot of getting used to not having those feelings of desperation (which is good of course) and i am so so so so happy but feels wierd after 5 years not having to try and concieve anymore (which is good too). I want to jump forward to jan when i will be 12 weeks and all my knicker checking is over and i can relax a bit.
I am so keeping my fingers crossed for you summermagic it would be great if you are.
Just do the test i am on tenter hooks waiting for you, please please please do the test. When did you Ov do you know? if you do and you are 14DPO then do it it should show up.

Baby dust your way.

Hi all. Turns out I was doing the tests wrong - they are internet cheapies and the instructions were not clear but someone on another thread has helped me out. So I retested this morning with the cheapie and a cb digital and BFN. So now I'm down to hoping I'm in the 13% or that I'm having a 15 day LP and in the 48%, but in reality I'm pretty sure now that I'm not.

Ray - so glad that things are going well for you. lol for your message to summermagic, I'm desperate for her to test too, but I understand why you don't want to summermagic . And thanks, I did have a nice evening and I found some shoes today, but no outfit so back-up dance exam clothes it is. Clomid should make your cycle closer to 28 days and you're not being irritating. Good luck!

Vics - hope you're OK too.

Hi everybody,

Summer - As soon as you've tested you MUST tell us!! I am hanging on the edge of my seat!! BFP would be great!! Understand why you are so reluctant though.

Ray - Glad you are well. Scary times I know, but hopefully soon you will be able to chill out and enjoy the wait!

Issey - Try and keep your spirits up, sooooo hard I know, it will work out for us, I'm sure

Saw my pregnant sis in law today, finally had a heart to heart and explained how I was feeling to her. I am so lucky, she was very understanding. Feeling overjoyed for them but sooo jealous and unhappy that it's not me. Real mixed bag of emotions. They had trouble conceiving too so they really do know what it's like.

This is a difficult journey eh?

Love to all x x x x

Hi Vic - nice to hear from you and glad you've spoken with your sister-in-law.

I meant to say that my friend, who is 15 weeks pg after 18 months of trying, told me on the phone last week that in her successful attempt she took the new pregnacare conception tablets rather than the ordinary pregnacare. They're really expensive at £10 for 30, but given that my 8th IUI attempt will probably be my last I've decided to throw everything at it and bought some today.

Fingers crossed you won't need them summermagic xx.

Hi Issey, that is a good tip. I will check them out for myself. After speaking to sis in law today, have decided to spend the three month break from treatment monitoring my temp. Just to get to know my cycle better, thought this would be helpful when treatment starts again. Maybe the clomid will have kick started ovulation? I have heard this can happen.

Off to bed now, feeling more positive though, after a difficult week.

Love to all x x x x