Thread for those fed up of pregnant friends... actually pregnant women everywhere... while they themselves have been TTC for ages or keep having miscarriages.

[GordonTheGopher]

I know it's not very PC. But I can't help but be really jealous. Just this morning I got an email off another friend telling me she's pregnant - first month of trying.

That makes 6 friends who are pregnant. I have been TTC no 2 for two years. I had a MMC last May and an early MC last week.

I do try and be happy for them. But in reality I'm not.

Am I normal? Anyone care to join me?

Rubbish isnt it....

And just to cheer me up, someone else I know is up the duff. MARVELOUS!

Agggggggggggggggggghhhh...there, i feel better now

arrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhh someone at work just had twins (naturally), someone else just announced pregnancy, girl next to me pregnant with 3rd child and constantly moaning that "this child is sucking the life out of me", other person from work just gone on maternity leave - but do I get a break from her pregnancy related witterings...........ooooohhhhhhh noooooo. She keeps us all FULLY updated with facebook status updates about 3 times a day ALL relating to her fricking pregnancy "xxxx is thinking her bump is massive" "xxxxx cant belive how good the 3D scan video is, have a look everyone!" fuck off fuck off fuck off fuuuuuuuuuuucccckkkk offfffffffffffff!!!!!!!!

SORRY everyone just had to hget it out.

lol pinkmook, a familiar feeling you just expressed!

am thinking of having the V's tattooed on my forehead!

Then I can just point at them and not even waste my breath when someone says they are pregnant (dont really mean that just venting!)

LOL Pinkmook

I'm ssssssssooooooooooooo in touch with that emotion.

I dont really mean it, only in the moment when I feel all the injustice and pent up rage of trying and failing to do this thing month after month.....

Hi everyone, I might have posted earlier on this thread but I can't remember!

Not read all, but Ray heart goes out to you, it truly must be hell what you're going through, don't berate yourself I admire you for keeping on trying for this long. Hopwfully the recurrent mc unit will be able to help.

I already have dd she's 2. Had mc on 14th Sept (dds birthday ) have ov x2 since then, 1 Af have been trying but think af is on it'd way next week, don't "feel" pg. Friend came round yesterday to tell me her happy news (she's been ttc number 2 for 4 months). Put on a brave face but feel as if I've been punched in the stomach. Have had a v wobbly day today crying in car on my own.

Trying to do a postgrad in CBT and work as well, but seriously flaking out not sleeping, not coping can't think of anything else apart from being pg again.

peacelily you sound like you need to get your strength together - i had a mc in MArch and chucked myself into work and everything to try to get back to normal as succeeded in running myself down completely - I am only now getting back to normal. None of which will help ttc so please try to look after yuorself as much as you can - hard when you have a 2yo I know (I do too) but important - take care

Ughh can i join you girls? We started TTC before anyone else we knew. Infact all of the below are either unplanned or conceived within 3 months. Bare in mind none of these woman had ANY kids when we started TTC. Now, we know..

1 whos just had baby number 3
1 pregnant with baby number 3
2 who've had 2 kids
2 who are currently pregnant with number 2

Then there's us... still at square one. Thats 14 pregnancies we've had to witness. And about a bazillion failed cycles for us. AF started for me yesterday, and hearing ex SIL 10 week old baby down the phone just about pushed me into a breakdown. I had to try so hard just not to cry down the phone. I'm so desperate for us to have a family and time is running out. It's absolutely heartbreaking.

TTC05 - its shit isn't it? Sorry to be blunt but it really is. Its like some special kind of hell!! I think I must have been very bad in a former life

Pinkmook you are so right, i feel the same way! Im beginning to get pi$$d off hearing about everyone else getting pregnant when it wasn't even planned/wanted. And even all these women that join these TTC boards... the first cycle they usually get pregnant too! I think im like a fertility charm for everybody but ME lol

AF has really hit me hard this month. Starting another year without a BFP is SO depressing. I'm due at the consultant at the end of the month, so that is another month wasted with no Clomid and no O. Ughh.. when do we get our BFPs???

Hello - am popping in and out at the moment but needed support tonight.

Have been ttc for three years now, 1 mc two years ago. 'Unexplained'

Found out yesterday that another friend is pregnant. She was ttc for 2 months and before this has vocalised how much she didn't want children that much.

I feel like I must have been so evil in a past life to keep on getting these kick backs. I don't mind so much if people really want them but when they are so relaxed about it and feel it is so easy it makes me want to cry

I feel the last two years have almost been wasted and all these other people have been having fun then just decide to have a baby and bingo!

ttc05 & pinkmore I know exactly how you are thinking, I have to face a whole workforce who are popping them out. I am the oldest one who is not pregnant or just had one. Feel like a real failure sometimes as it should be the most natural thing in the world and my body can't do it

Are is there no-one in RL who is ttc???

hello everyone..

ho!ho!ho! not... sigh... not been in for a while as have decided to live under my bed where i can be sure there are no pregnant women, babies or anything else -natal.. passed one yr anniversary post m/c last month and had decided (in yet another moment of madness)that this was the month.. that it would all come good cause it had been a year (so?) and i had now learned my lesson to appreciate the pain of others,(so?) to appreciate how lucky i'd be to fall pregnant,(so?) followed the sperm meets egg plan to a tee,(SO?) did everything that i was supposed to or could have done(SO?SO?SO?).. and... nada.. i mean seriously... what the heck is the point of all this? to put a massive strain on my relationship? check.. to turn me into a psycho? check to fear and dread phone calls from friends who say "guess what?" .. check... i bet when i go to then dentist in the new year my teeth'll all be half an inch shorter i've been gritting and grinding them so much for the last year..

anyone know anything about or had HSG..? it's the cathether, dye, are your tubes open or closed procedure.. having it done on wed.. any info, advice etc would be so great.. was reading up on american website and it all sounded terrible.. although a lot of them mention hsg as having a positive albeit very short term effect on fertility.. not that i need a scientific reason to believe anything related to enhancing one's fertility, but has anyone heard that that might be the case.. ?i'll happily take on some apparently painful and potentially just another kick-in-the-teeth experience to help in even a teeny tiny way..

hope you're ok Ray if you're still reading but just not able to write.. hi pinkmook! how are you? did your DH have good luck in bouncing back from redundancy? i really hope so..hello TTC05, sorry to hear it's all so horribly horrible for you to... letting it all out here really helps so take a deep breath..!!

I just wanted to post to tell Fifi that I had an HSG less than 2 weeks ago and it was really nowhere near as nasty as those websites make out (actually it was not nasty at all). It was uncomfortable in the same way that having a smear is uncomfortable, but mine was not painful and I had no cramping. Just as with a smear, the more relaxed you can stay the easier it is. I did take 2 paracetomol and 2 nurofen about 45 mins before going in, so that might have helped (or at least might have helped me to stay relaxed). It was over in probably less than 5 minutes.

Get them to turn the screen so you can see what is going on. I found looking at my innards a great distraction!

The one thing I did find a bit shocking was that I seemed to bleed a lot afterwards. I was spotting when I went for my HSG and the nurse thought that it sort of flushed out loose blood from my uterus (sorry, that's probably way TMI), but I stopped spotting within 48 hours. They should give you a sanitary towel but you might as well take a couple with you.

Re the fertility thing, I have read that too. My radiologist seemed to think it was not true, but then did say that it might help some people where they have mucus or other debris in their tubes. Either way, the procedure itself is really not that bad, honest!

HTH

thanks mrshappy! that really helps!! huge relief! was expecting the worst so i might even be pleasantly surprised !! hmmm.. had first round of blood tests and gynae ultrasound last month and was so traumatised by the whole thing i ovulated 5 days later than usual!! honestly all i could think was if i had not had DS all that prodding and poking in such a matter of fact almost brutal way would have had me in tears.. staff were really brusk and wouldn't discuss anything with me.. only saw fertility nurse but she was really pushing a PCOS diagnosis as ultrasound showed cysts on one ovary (apparently 25% of women have these but go undiagnosed) but have zero other symptoms and all bloodwork doesn't correlate with PCOS.. she actually dashed off to talk it over with consultant and came back with a perscription for metformin!! i was so shocked i didn't take it.. hence i was really worried about round 2!! did you have all those tests as well? did they throw up anything? thanks for the heads up on the bleeding bit.. it's good to know.. any variables or strange events in cycles drive me mad ..i'm usually really regular.. then if anything unusual happens i don't know where i stand and end up drawing all sorts of tentative lines and dreaming up all kinds of far fetched senarios as to how this time it'll be different etc.. really trying to manage my expectations this month.. and clearly not doing a good job..

No, I haven't had those tests, but I have had a lot of internal ultrasounds one way or another. My problem is that I have had 2 ectopics and a CP this year, so we know I ovulate but for some reason they don't implant in the right place, hence the HSG and next year a hysteroscophy (which I am dreading!).

I think it is pretty normal to ovulate later if you have been stressed out. I think of it as my body's way of protecting the egg and giving my body time to recover from the stress and so convince myself it is a good thing. Not being regular sometimes really is not the end of the world. After my CP I ovulated on CD26 (normally have a 31 day cycle) and did get pg, admittedly with an ectopic, but still. So don't stress too much. You'll be fine, honestly.

Hi guys,

Im not to bad on the outside but on the inside i think i may be dying!!! I went to see a friend yesterday and she is Pg 21 weeks, she did try for 2 and half years and i am very happy for her but we were sat there talking and she wouldnt stop touching her tummy and i wanted to cry, i just wanted to scream WHY ME. Then i was talking to another friend on the phone who is also Pg 14 weeks and she said something along the lines of ' Just my luck' about something and i wanted to shout ' you fell pg the first month of trying, this is your second child and everything is fine what have you got to moan about bitch' obviously i didnt coz i never do but seriously guys what have i ever done to deserve this, its almost like god is having a right old laugh up there making everyone around me pg and seeing how many it will take to make me crack.
I think i just have to face the fact that i will never have more children, i havent even got the energy to try anymore i realy havent.

sorry guys been away for a while and all i do is moan when i come back in.

Hi everyone. Just wondering if i can join you as i think i will fit right in. ttc number 2 for 18 months now and had 4 mc's along the way topped off last 2 months by chemical pregnancies (i know i shouldn't have tested early and i will NEVER do so again). Am starting to wonder if i will ever have another child - seriously it must be more than bad lukc to lose so may in a row? DS is 2 years old and everyone i know is pregnant with number 2. i want to be big about it and say that my losses shouldn't affect my happiness for them but it bloody does and i am not happy at all - just simmeringly jealous. why do they all have it so easy? Not one of them has had one mc and i have had 4. not fair. right enough moaning - am on CD9 so building up to try again this cycle. Am having acu but other than that we are just taking more relaxed approach because blatantly staying off alcohol etc has not helped one little bit! anyone else on a similar cycle?

charlie

Hi everyone, still here, still simmering and with added christmas stress so close to telling the world to f off or run away, reading all the posts has made me feel less of a freak.....

mrshappy, I had a hysteroscopy (well 2 actually as I have 2 uterus and can't keep a pregnancy going in either) and it wasn't so bad, the GA was the worst hangover.

fifi08, if your AF's are regular then you're right it can't be PCOS, go back armed eith some statistics and the fact your blood work doesn't correlate, go and stand up for yourself as if you were doing it for DS.

Big hugs everyone, lets hope if we were all so bad in a former life we bloody well enjoyed it at the time for we're so as hell paying for it now.

Hi everyone!

just wanted to say happy christmas to you all.. only 13 more days till the end of 2008, good riddance!! here's to 2009 and to all of you! to your power to carry on and make it look to the rest of the world that you're still ok, while slowly going gaga, here's to your ability to push the super sadness deep deep down at the moments where people "announce" or say stuff that is just plain heartless and cruel and "act normal" and congratulate and smile and hold it together long enough till you get outside/to the car/home/to your bedroom.. here's to the superhuman powers you have to still "try" while being kicked and punched and beaten by life and chance and luck.. here's to all your poor bruised and aching souls and hearts.. here's to you who hear yourselves say "how did i get to this point? how did things ever get this bad?".. be nice to yourselves this christmas and give yourselves the credit you deserve for just making it through 2008 with your face washed and your hair brushed never mind hold down a job and keep a tidy house and look after your families.. most of all i wish you all peace, even if it's only 15 minutes here and there, where the screaming pain of all of this falls quiet and you're just a normal, happy, laughing human being for a little bit.. happy christmas everyone, love lots fifi xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hi Guys,

I have not posted in ages as felt it was making me more obsessed. BuT

I am soooo fed up, clomid cycles are coming to an end cant believe been through 4 months of it. This last cycle is weird had more side effects than normal but OPK hasnt picked up a surge yet. Loads of people asking and saying "ooh you'll be having one soon" and i just want to scream.

Also really sick of "how ARE you feeling" line from everyone. Think am going to lie and tell them all we going on a non TTCing 6months. that might make them all leave me alone.

Sorry for the rant am just really fed up.

This christmas has meant seeing lots of old friends and their families and having to deal "with questions like so when are you going to have kids then?" which has been annoying to say the least. Am also due to get my period soon and this is once again going to coincide with what should be a happy visit from family and their newborn. Typical eh!

Not got any peaks on my fertility monitor, EWCM seems to have gone on holiday for the last two cycles and I am generally feeling like poo and worrying that I am now in peri-menopause. Also had to go to a work baby shower for someone who is due to give birth in January and keeps updating their facebook status to say things like 'fertile woman is packing her bag for the hospital' and 'fertile woman can't wait to meet her son'