Thread for those fed up of pregnant friends... actually pregnant women everywhere... while they themselves have been TTC for ages or keep having miscarriages.

[GordonTheGopher]

I know it's not very PC. But I can't help but be really jealous. Just this morning I got an email off another friend telling me she's pregnant - first month of trying.

That makes 6 friends who are pregnant. I have been TTC no 2 for two years. I had a MMC last May and an early MC last week.

I do try and be happy for them. But in reality I'm not.

Am I normal? Anyone care to join me?

Pinkie and the others - I've been considering accupuncture as well. When is the best time to start seeing someone? Is it CD1? or is it best to go for a consultation before then so that you can start treatment on CD1?

Thanks

Hi lastboxoftampons

I dont think it matters when you start when i went on cd6 she did what she did and then said again next week for the ovulation.

I would def. think you need one before ovulation so it can start to rebalance your body before they do the ovulation one.
dont think it matters too much when this one is.

They tend to do a lengthy consultation when you first go and treat you from that.
Hope that helps

Baby dust to you

Hi pinkie,

sounds Very interesting think i may give it a go next Month.

Alittle worried at the mo have very bad pain in my right side V low down in the tube area, and also in the tummy and funnily enough in the shoulderi Know OHSS cannot occurr until after Ov so cannot be that as only on CD7. trying to last out and see if it goes away if not will have to go to doc tomorrow.
Have you had anything like this pinkie, or anyone else? Need advise quick

Hi ray

It sounds like trapped wind of all things which can give you a pain in the shoulder that is like an 'empty feeling' drink couple of peppermint tea if you've got otherwise hot water with lemon.

You can get this when you are creating eggs but if its persistent would def ring your doc and fill them in. Am sure its better to be safe and know you can rest easier once youve asked the question.

I had the pain in shoulder when i was younger and has pcos always knew when was ovulating due to shoulder pain. so could just be the clomid making the ovary work.

I felt much relief when yesterday was told dont worry so always worth a call.

Hope that helps and let me know how you get on XXX

Hi Pinkie,

Thanks for the advise i will waitt and see if it goes if it doesnt then will call the doc in the morning to ask them. Thats all you can do ay. I am just hoping that it is a sign of the Ovary working and that i will have lots of eggs and lots of chances to conceive would be nice he he.

Good luck hon let me know how you get on with Acupunture tomorrow.

Hi guys am feeling extra down today as a friend from the vasectomy reversal thread who only had her DH's reversal 3 onths ago has fell pregnant :-( ours was 15 months ago.

Dont get me wrong I am very happy for her just gutted for myself :-( feel like its never going to happen. DH had some other sperm test results back on monday and although his count has in creased (to 15.7mil/ml) its still below 20Mil needed and morph/motility wasnt great - also the consultant (who was very rude and abrupt) said we were still waiting for the anti sperm antibodies test results back and if he has them thats it - game over - no chance of natural conception. I have heard there is treatment for this (in the form of steroids) but he was adamant it is untreatable and refused to refer DH to a urologist as in his opinion it cannot be treated. Not tht we know he has ASA yet - but I just have this feeling he has :-(

The consultant was so horrible and I just feel so fed up :-( Ok venting over, hope everyone else is OK

Hi Pinkspook,

so sorry to hear of you upset what a bummer. Did you know what her DH sperm results are ? if they are similar surely there is some hope, there should be anyway just remember it only takes one to do the job.

I was just wondering if any one has ever heard of a womans body attacking sperm. its crossed my mind a few times and if there is how do you get tested for it and can they treat it ?

Thanks Ray81 - I am sure I have heard of that - hostile CM or something? Maybe someone with more clue than me will come along soon!

Hiya

My doctor tells me that they do a test called a 'post coital' test to see if your CM is inhospitable. Ie I guess they take a swab after sex and test it to see how easily the sperm is making its way through the CM.

She also mentioned 'sperm washing' - not sure if it is what it sounds like.

"Sperm washing is a procedure used to prepare sperm for use in IUI. It allows your partner?s sperm a better chance for survival and fertilization. Sperm washing separates sperm cells from a man?s semen, helping to get rid of dead or slow-moving sperm as well as additional chemicals that may impair fertilization. Once sperm has been washed at your fertility clinic?s laboratory, it can be used during IUI to help achieve pregnancy. There are a variety of different sperm washing procedures."

found this on the web

Hi Beanie, thanks for that.

we had IUI in may and it failed but had the sperm washing then and was told DH had very good sperm and very good count so not sure why it failed.

I think if we dont get PG within the 6 months of clomid will go back to doc and see if they can do the test to see if my cm is causing the prob.

Thanks pinkie I just had my first consultation and i have a weak digestion apparently so we are starting with that as it is CD27 so although I am 99% certain I am not pg she thought it best to wait untilknowing for definate so on with the reproductive needles next week! It was a good session though so let's see how it goes....hope everyone is doing OK today??

Hello everyone - felt quite rubbish today - another person at work is pregnant after trying for two months. Just hit again how it is now three years (1mc two years ago).

Is it just me or does this ttc really hit all your confidence in other areas. I know that I'm good at work have a fab relationship but I feel such a failure DH is not keen to try assisted contraception. I've booked an appointment in private clinic in Jan don't know if I want to go either but I don't want miss the oppportunity and be too old. NHS won't fund until I'm 36, I'm 34 in Jan.

It's so hard as I don't want to pressure him but it is so hard trying to continue with everything.

On a more positive note the AC has given me my first ovulation at CD 14 since ttc. Hopefully will have a 28 day cycle, this is my second month of taking it. Did have short luteal phase so hoping this is the thing that will help ever hopeful!!

I'm off to have tarot cards read this week - will let you know if they are good

Hello everyone - felt quite rubbish today - another person at work is pregnant after trying for two months. Just hit again how it is now three years (1mc two years ago).

Is it just me or does this ttc really hit all your confidence in other areas. I know that I'm good at work have a fab relationship but I feel such a failure DH is not keen to try assisted contraception. I've booked an appointment in private clinic in Jan don't know if I want to go either but I don't want miss the oppportunity and be too old. NHS won't fund until I'm 36, I'm 34 in Jan.

It's so hard as I don't want to pressure him but it is so hard trying to continue with everything.

On a more positive note the AC has given me my first ovulation at CD 14 since ttc. Hopefully will have a 28 day cycle, this is my second month of taking it. Did have short luteal phase so hoping this is the thing that will help ever hopeful!!

I'm off to have tarot cards read this week - will let you know if they are good

Hello everyone - felt quite rubbish today - another person at work is pregnant after trying for two months. Just hit again how it is now three years (1mc two years ago).

Is it just me or does this ttc really hit all your confidence in other areas. I know that I'm good at work have a fab relationship but I feel such a failure DH is not keen to try assisted contraception. I've booked an appointment in private clinic in Jan don't know if I want to go either but I don't want miss the oppportunity and be too old. NHS won't fund until I'm 36, I'm 34 in Jan.

It's so hard as I don't want to pressure him but it is so hard trying to continue with everything.

On a more positive note the AC has given me my first ovulation at CD 14 since ttc. Hopefully will have a 28 day cycle, this is my second month of taking it. Did have short luteal phase so hoping this is the thing that will help ever hopeful!!

I'm off to have tarot cards read this week - will let you know if they are good

Hello everyone - felt quite rubbish today - another person at work is pregnant after trying for two months. Just hit again how it is now three years (1mc two years ago).

Is it just me or does this ttc really hit all your confidence in other areas. I know that I'm good at work have a fab relationship but I feel such a failure DH is not keen to try assisted contraception. I've booked an appointment in private clinic in Jan don't know if I want to go either but I don't want miss the oppportunity and be too old. NHS won't fund until I'm 36, I'm 34 in Jan.

It's so hard as I don't want to pressure him but it is so hard trying to continue with everything.

On a more positive note the AC has given me my first ovulation at CD 14 since ttc. Hopefully will have a 28 day cycle, this is my second month of taking it. Did have short luteal phase so hoping this is the thing that will help ever hopeful!!

I'm off to have tarot cards read this week - will let you know if they are good

WOW!! Sorry but my computer froze and I've managed to post four times - sorry!!!

It might not go down well me posting on here, as I now have two DS's. However, the OP really touched a nerve in me. I find it extremely difficult to get pregnant, and I remember coming home in tears every time someone in the office said they were pregnant. I took it so personally and it tore me apart.

I wish you all the best, and hope for good news for you all in the near future. It (eventually) happened to me, but only after I nearly gave up completely.

x

Thankyou all for making me feel less of a horrible person!! I've had 7 ms now and luckily have 1 beautiful 4 year old. But I work in a predominately female enviroment, almost every month someone announces their good news. I'm sick of coming home and locking myself in the loo and sobbing. Its not straightforward, I have 2 wombs and developed rheumatoid arthritis when baby was 6wks old. We've been ttc for 3 yrs now (4 misc), have been scanned, examined etc but no reasons. If i hear one more person say relax, give yourself a break or it'll happen I may just commit gbh at the very least. I feel like I'm about to shatter into pieces as yet another month goes by with no luck despite making a huge effort...

Hi poppy,

so sorry to hear that yet another person os PG. i am just like you and have a cry evertime soemone annonces they are pg for first time or pg again. There is a girl here at work and she PCOS and has been trying for a year and a half, she is now 12 weeks and had just had scan, i am the only one she told and she came and showed me the scan today. Do you know what i wanted to hit her, i wanted to scream and say ' i dont care about you being pg i want to be pg'. God i feel so mean i just dont understand how when we have no probs we can fall yet people who have probs seem to be falling all over the place.

Hi badknees u are def not a horrible person and i am so sorry to hear of your problems. if only we could all join eachother in the toilet when we want a cry, soemtimes i feel so alone when i feel like that and i just want to cry forever.
I will also join you on the GBH thing, so many people keep telling me to relax, not to think about it, give yourselve a break, stop trying and it will happen, dont try so hard i will kill someone, i have to bite my tonge every time and count to ten before i can wlak away without committing murder.
I also feel like am going to shatter into a million peices and trying realy hard this month am on Clomid second month and have been doing OPKS have had +ive today so BDing over the next 4 days everyday twice a day, i am also going to take showers instead of baths in the hope that the sperm wont get washed away in part (probably doesnt happen like that but worth a try) i just know we are going to do this and Af will still arrrive on time as always. If it does fail this month i think i realy will fall apart.

ray81 and badknees you sound like its a baaaaaaaaad day - big virtual hugs and have one of my sweeties Ive just bought from our canteen. Rubbish response I know but at least you know you have us to vent to.

poppie I completely agree re work - I missed a promotion this year thanks to my head being everywhere due to the mc and nwo I'm feeling very lost which isnt a good palce to be what with the credti crunch etc. We're doing our goals at the moment for next year and for the first time ever I am stumpted. AF due today/tomorrow so am not concentrating as I should anyway and off to get a 2nd opinion for my Parkinson's tomorrow so maybe its no wonder I cant focus. Hohum.

Ontheup, Thanks for the hugs and the sweeties, it is so nice to be able to talk to people that know exactly how you feel and to know that i am not an awful person or th only one who feels this way.

I'm not surprised that you cant concentrate, any signs re AF did you give it a good try this month? and sorry about your parkinsons i cant imagine how you must feel, whats the diagonosis? how come you need a second opinion.
No offence, but when i hear about people in your situation it does make me think how lucky i am not to have any other probs other than fertility, although do have a stomach condition thats bad but doesnt affect fertility and also have Pelvic Venus congestion which also doesnt affect fertility but does cause lots of pain when OV and when Af due, there is nothing i can do about it the only way to get rid of it is to either wait for it ........... get pregant(why didnt i think of that) or to have a hystorectomy (not happening) so just have to live with the pain.
I realy hope that you are ok and big virtual hugs back i am praying fpr you and hoping that your Af doesnt arive and you are pg. Lots and Lots of baby dust your way.

Hi everyone!
haven't checked in for a while but it's no surprise how much this thread has grown! i'm 12 months post m/c and have been trying since first period post m/c.(11 months)I have one son, he's nearly 2 and he's great. me? i'm very slowly falling to pieces. what i think is so obvious and isn't understood is that everyone who feels bad about .. well.. feeling crazed with anger and rage.. is that what we're all experiencing is grief.. not just people who have had m/cs.. which of course is an absolutely horrifyingly sad experience.. but everyday and month that passes that you're not pregnant your idea of how you thought, or what you wanted, your life to be slowly fades away.. and i think there's no acknowledgement of that by "outsiders".. i tend not to fill people in on how i really feel.. i did tell a friend once who spoke nonstop about her pregnancy in the months after my m/c and it made absolutely no difference - in fact it felt as if she turned the volume up afterwards so i felt doubly hurt for taking the chance on telling someone something so hugely personal and then having it revealed to me that she really wasn't much of a friend anyway..i didn't want her to stop talking about it.. i just wanted her to talk about other stuff too!!! for me now the acute pain on seeing pregnant people/ hearing stories of accidental pregnancies/sitting through conversations where people without children plan their future pregnancies, seeing the perfect 6,4,2 family, that terrible head-spinning pain is passing .. it's just a constant low-grade heartache now.. to all those who think you're crackers you're absolutely not.. rage and asking why are classic reactions in grief and most importantly please remember that it is cyclical and that's why it's so upsetting.. you're ok for a week or two, you begin to feel sane and almost human again and then something happens and you feel like you're right back to square one sobbing and burning with anger..it feels like you're never making any progress in coping but if you look closely you really are, the crying might be for 1 hr instead of 2 or you drink 2 instead of 3 glasses of wine.. i keep my thoughts on this subject for special places like this where everyone here is careful and respectful with anything someone says.. because they know, they breathe it, eat it, sleep it everyday.. in the meantime all i want to do is get on the bus!! never mind the 9 month journey and all the worry attached to that..so just like every other month for the last 11 i'll stand by the busstop with my hand out.. hoping..

Hi ladies....really need your kind of advice. Please don't shoot me for posting here or be mad that I have invaded your thread but....

Alittle background...
I have been ttc for over a year and half. My sister who is in her 40s and posibily now pre-menepausal has been trying for about 5 or more years. we both have one child. Recently she has sought fertility treatment and we were gonna do this together. However, just before the appointment I found out I was pregnant and though happy unsure what to do. Although we both still went to the appointment I made an excuse of not being sure and decided that I'd wait and support her. She has had a real hard time of it and is currently having her eggs retrevied. I am so hoping this works for her so that I can tell her but if it doesn't was wandering what I should do. If any of you were her, what would you want from me? Should I wait until the 12wk scan is over (as I have had a previous m/c so this little bean may not even stick), or should I include her early on as this may make her feel part of the whole thing or it may make her resent being around me....seriously don't know what to do...PLEASE HELP...All advice welcome, and sorry again for crashing your thread but this seemed the most logical place to go... x

fifi08 what a beautiful post - you summed up pretty much how I feel - are you me??! I guess it really is a kind of grief - god it feels good to put a label on it like that - dont know why!?

I love the bus stop analogy - I think we should name the next thread for us fed uppers "the bus stop"!

x